After I read most of what you wrote, I don't see in you a real atheist (who perceives his human living flesh only to take care of).
If I am not wrong, it seems you are raised among certain kind of Christians (I said 'certain kind' because there are many Christian sects and dominations in the world). I personally was raised in a Catholic family. And when I was about 15 years old, I noticed that most Church's teachings were irrational or illogical, to me in the least, since they contradict, in a way or another, my deep nature and logic. Obviously, these teachings are claimed to reflect (being inspired by) Jesus ones. So I had no choice but to prove, once for all and also to myself, that Jesus, as presented on the Gospel (a Catholic Arabic version) I had, is simply another character used by certain men, along history, to gain money, power and glory (as it is the case in all other beliefs; sorry for not giving examples to avoid hurting the feelings of some). And I started reading/analysing attentively every saying attributed to Jesus in person. The first discovery that I reached after a while surprised me. Jesus, unlike anyone else, seems knowing very well 'my' nature. Then, with time, I realised that Jesus is indeed the perfect teacher (having the knowledge about my being and the world as it is in reality) that I was looking for. So unlike most Christians, I had no reason to have faith in Jesus because I ended up to know Jesus as I know myself. After all, He already agrees with me on whatever I have discovered since then. He also helped me know how to discover even more things by various simple, though effective, hints.
Can I call myself Christian? I am afraid I can't, because I usually hear that a Christian shouldn't believe that Jesus is 'perfect' in his teachings to the end of time and all other references, said of God or else, were just addressed to certain people in a certain period of time only.
If I look for men's glory, I would be a faithful believer in a certain religious group. But it happens that I am not of this world so I leave its glory and treasures to those who are created to serve it (by following God's instructions embedded already in their living cells). By the way, serving the world by destroying and building (as in a wild jungle) has its own story. So I wasn't surprised that most members of my family (who were looking for money and sex, besides being Christian) used seeing in me an insane person at best

They couldn't understand how a highly educated person (professional in electronics) works to gain his daily bread and to support those who assist him in his small private business only. They also couldn't understand how I wasn't interested at all in having any sort of sexual relations as Jesus was (to them, Jesus only is allowed to be so

). Yes, I didn't get married. As you know, I had to get a permission of a ruling system, religious of civil, in order to live normally with a woman for life. I can't live with a person because of any law. I am free and I live with free persons only.
Finally, I am afraid to say that, based on my personal experiences and observations, today's Christianity sees in Jesus the God's Lamb only and not the Divine Perfect Teacher to those who are born of the Spirit (besides having a flesh). Obviously, the men in charge of a Christian Church put aside many Jesus sayings as {Matthew 5:44-45} for example since it is about the Divine Unconditional Love that most men don't like hearing in the first place

.