Chastity

[sweet_mother]

I understand your concern. Just to let you all know I am living in chastity now. I am still battling perverted thought patterns old. Many like - well, female bodies. I have a respect for women but I am uncomfortable around them because I have worry. Worry of committing adultery in my heart. And this can be a good thing, considering what I have been going through. My future self can't repent when my future self is reliving past mistakes - sins against God... These are HIS bodies, this is his blood, his flesh - this is his grace. There is no way to bury his grace out of existence - just look at Jesus. He makes me a sinner for us all, if I follow his example, if I take up my cross - embrace that feeling. For a while, it was consensual sex. When I tried to stop, she tempted me still. It was probably my fault for defiling her in the first place. I didn't know much better - maybe when I was younger I did, but after being addicted to porn I fell from that moral code and thought it was okay because the rest of the world did it anyways. Yes she tempted me when I didn't want any - but that's when I realized my problems had grown far more out of my reach than I could control in the heat of the moment... Could I deny sex? YES. Could she? It took me lashing out to get it through her head - which I know is wrong, anger and violence is never necessary for getting anything out of life. This is truly a bigger struggle for me than I thought. I honestly feel like leaving her at times because my heart has a check - it feels as though God wants me to stay away from her because she is misguiding me away from Jesus and my walk with the lord. I'm not an angry person - I must be full of anxiety and desires and fears. I'm only human though - I would expect all of us to get mad from time to time - but when it comes to people I am supposed to love, it tends to come caving in on me.

I'm proud of you for making that step becoming in God's likeness, you're worth it. Now for your girl I think if your not feeling right than that's the holy ghost letting you know maybe it's time to move on from her. My Fiance was the one who decided he wanted to wait til marriage and I didn't keep encouraging him... I trusted in him and respected his wishes because I'm his helpmate I was made to be submissive to him and hear out his opinions, show him good guidance. That's what you need in a woman you want to marry; sensitive to your feelings, good influence, kind to you and others, loving, faithful, and mainly always devoting herself to God. She needs to keep the true words of God in her heart to be a good future wife and mother. I'm not saying it's easy for women but I working on myself everyday with the help of the Lord becoming a better person. Give yourself some to think about the disadvantages and advantages of your relationship with her, pray, and ask for God guidance. He will let you know some way or another. You deserve a good women Cote never think otherwise because your definitely worth it to God.


God bless you,

sweet_mother

 

[SBNmediamember]

Cote,
There's no doubt that you love the Lord Jesus Christ and that you understand His great Love for you! It's been a joy these past few days to watch your growth in Christ Jesus and I'm so happy I stumbled on your converstion. For you threw it out to the Christian world through Talk Jesus when you could have chosen so many other avenues to suppress your thoughts. You turned to the body of Christ and, in so doing, you strengthened ALL of us! You have NO idea how many people are being touched by your sharing, brother. For in your weakness, we can clearly see that God is STRONG! And through your issue, God is reaching many. Glory to God! There's a verse somewhere (and perhaps my brothers and sisters can help) that says that when we have passed through a trial, that we should turn around and help our brethren. And that's exactly what the Lord will have you do when you come through this fire, for through it you WILL come! Heavens! Think of all the prayers that have gone up for you. Isn't it beautiful? And let me share something more. It's not just worldly men who are plagued with thoughts of perversion. NO! Cote, you would be SURPRISED how MANY "Christian" brothers (AND SISTERS) are caught in the same soup! It's a powerful TRAP more addicting than drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes! I know, brother, because I was also troubled all my life by these things. But, you know? The Lord began helping me as I continued to cry out to Him, and it wasn't until I began understanding the POWER of His Cross that I was truly delivered...yes, truly. I am now good friends with a female lifer in a state prison and understand fully how strong the addiction can be, as these dear ladies will attest. But she and I know first hand God's powerful Hand to deliver. We discuss our failings as, surely, they happen because Satan only attacks in our most vulnerable times. BUT! In our deeper understanding of God's Grace and Mercy? We have learned to RUN to God, ask forgiveness, and tell Satan he's a LIAR. We ARE delivered...and COMPLETELY. We tell him that our deliverance came 2,000 years ago at that Cross. OUR VICTORY WAS WON THERE! So we give Satan back his guilt trip, we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and we go on with Jesus Christ... JUST THE SAME!!! For Christ remembers our sins no more and neither should we!! So, the more we do this, Cote, the stronger our faith in Christ Jesus becomes, and the more we KNOW THAT HE IS ABLE TO SAVE TO THE UTTER MOST!!! That's why I said in a previous email, one day you'll turn around and this thing will be behind you. And what will you have?? A TEST-IMONY from your test! So that you, like me and my prison friend, will be able to turn around and strengthen the brethren. You will not only have knowledge of the situation and how troubling it is, but you will also have COMPASSION. You will be a witness to him (or her) that we CAN have the more abundant life that Jesus Christ died to give, KNOWING first hand that Christ, indeed, CAN DO ALL THINGS. It will be Christ who gets the Glory and not you, for you will know that in your own strength you didn't stand a chance. You will know the power of Faith, the supreme importance of never giving up, and the strong need to preach only Christ and Him crucified for EVERY situation that has troubled our minds (1 Cor. 2:2). I have more to say about my own recent trials with dating temptations, but I've already gone over anyone's limit. I'm just so happy you haven't given up in defeat, for you truly are MORE than a conquerer in Christ Jesus. Thank you, too, for making me a friend. And, if you'd like, I can send you to a website where you will receive a constant supply of POWER IN THE CROSS messages that will lift your spirits, destroy condemnation, give a song in your heart that will never end. And you will have courage to give the devil a big ole' black eye! Let me know, Cote, or anyone else reading this. Again, I'm so proud of you. Keep trusting Christ and what He has accomplished for you at Calvary.

 

[Cote Dawg]

My pastor told me it's probably time to move on from her. I don't want to. I want her to be the one... After I was saved - God showed me a love that I will NEVER have, and it was in her, to me, she is my love, well she was... It was such a moving moment and deep, burning penetration into my heart that I couldn't possibly bear to lose that feeling, the sense that I had that something with her. But after my heart had a check - once I did get back with her, something was telling me we would have to start out slow. We've crossed every bridge since then. And now my path is being directed away from her and towards the light. If she doesn't follow me then there is nothing I can do about losing her. Maybe I'm negative? A hypocrite? Naïve? I don't know but I know she doesn't trust me the way love usually should. To me, her life with males often makes me want to explode, makes me want to exploit their hearts for what they have projected onto her visible body, and what their spiritual bodies look like onto hers. She doesn't get it. I want her to love me and I want to feel it - and often times I get that satisfaction I need. Sadly, it's not enough. It doesn't keep me there. She feels as though she should be keeping me out of line for her own... exploitation? Projection.. If ever I have been selfish about it with her, I cried. I love her so much and to see her heart feel so trashy, bratty, and negative near my person, my soul... It hurts, deeply, I have a yearning to know more about it but I feel as though she wasn't there - never letting me into her fantasy, her wild things, never has any fruit to bare. She cannot confess not a single sin to me. She doesn't feel like she does anything wrong. And when she says that I know she feels like a liar, I know the holy spirit is nudging on her, telling her - take a second glance at the way you are receiving my opinion, my outlook upon your mortal soul. I am crying out for a second opinion, is it time for me to leave? I don't know, I don't want it to have to come to that. When she is being tested by me and by God all in one, she can tell she needs to hurry and do something about it because she doesn't have much time, because she doesn't. She passes the test and begins failing miserably all over again - everywhere and every little thing. I respect her emotion structure, I don't have any hate, resentment in total out toward her person/being. But I know that is not how a right minded, moral, ethically sane and meek person should display their heart. Without courage. I asked her. Who is more important to you - Me or God? She paused. I said I want the truth, I know you know what is right and I also know you know what is honest, so of course, she chose me - no lying there. I want this woman. I've put so many hardships and trials faced and hard work and emotional bondages. I want to see deep, serene pictures with her, If I could only imagine. And we have had our moments like these. But it all comes down. And I am stuck - blow for blow. However, I am feeling great about knowing her person, scripturally I mean. She can't handle the truth. She can't face her inner demons. I am counting on her to provide for me. Not ONLY materially, because I will provide for her as well, whatever keeps her happy as can be. But I really want her to provide this unconditional love, this fire that restores me, my inner person - who shall be there for me? To make me wondrous, forgiving, and carefree/happy go lucky? Will she? Give it to me? I am a saint. And saints uplift saints. But she gives me no... compassion? ZEAL!

 

[sweet_mother]

If she really is everything your explaining her to be in this description than my best offerings to you is, you need to let her go. In my past times I thought I loved someone but it was always God tugging on me letting me know "Daughter I have someone greater for you in the future, let go." and I did because he was in my best intentions. That's the #1 man in my life, GOD and it should be for her as well. She shouldn't have answered your questions with you, I'm sorry but you know deep in your heart that shouldn't have been her answer either. Now I need to ask you the same question "Will it be her or God?" would you answer the same thing? than you are not walking with him as you say you are. I love my Fiance dearly I adore him but, my first answer would be our one and only true Lord. When times get hard in life you turn to him, when your sad, you turn to him, guidance, true love, eternal happiness, friendship, perseverance, strength, courage you should seek ALL that through HIM because his love will never fail you. Cote, your better than you know and you deserve a beautiful woman who knows her worth is like treasure in God's eyes. There ARE plenty fish in the sea and many of those fishes have a delightful hearts for the Lord. At the end of the day, you're the only one to make that decision.

 

[SBNmediamember]

Cote, I suppose you didn't understand anything I wrote? You're 20 years old? Perhaps that's why. I was 20 a long time ago and can still remember the floods of emotion that cloud young minds. But as Sweet Mother has counseled you, you must make the same decision that you thrust on your girlfriend. You'll either choose God or her, but you can't serve both. And this girl will NOT meet your needs, Cote. Only GOD can do that. Let me tell you, I didn't know this and paid HEAVY prices. I also sought people for advice and learned that it was the attention I craved. So it becomes a drama and this you want to renounce. Otherwise, what else can be said? You need to hear GOD's Voice in this matter, and I believe you've already heard it (through His written Word). For if the girl isn't saved (and we'll know them by their fruit), then the Bible warns that two people should not be unevenly yoked. You would have a life time of bondage that would be so destructive to you and all those around you. And I speak from experience. You must trust God to help you walk away. Then start over with the Lord and determine in your heart that He will make a way where there seems to be no way. But if you continue in the path you're on, then the end will be destruction. Guaranteed. I'll be praying for your strength to do the right thing. For, if you don't, you'll only end up enabling this destructive behavior in a girl who needs to hit rock bottom where she will have to face GOD...because she's already dealing with demons. You must be the example if you are truly born again...no choices. Absolutely none. So it will be hard, but God will give you supernatural strength and, once you've made the firm decision to do the right thing, then ask the Lord to help you avoid every appearance of evil...knowing that Jesus Christ's death and resurrection empowered you so that you can. Walk in that knowledge, Cote, and not in your carnal nature. Don't trust your gut, trust God. And this is walking by faith and not by sight, trusting your Savior, Jesus Christ. Otherwise, you'll only have a form of godliness and will continue to deny His Power, for which, the Bible tells us (your brothers and sisters in Christ!), that if you, Cote, continue this lifestyle after repeated warnings, then WE must turn away from you. Make sense? 2 Timothy 3:5-7 "Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts. Ever Learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the Truth." Because, in the end, it's God's Way or the highway, Cote. I'll be praying that you'll come through as gold. Turn it over to Jesus Christ, the ONE, TRUE Jesus, and not "another" Jesus and "another" spirit (2 Corinthians 11:2-4 "For I am jealous over you with godly jealousy: for I have espoused you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ. But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtlety, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ. For if he that cometh preacheth another Jesus, whom we have not preached, or if ye receive another spirit, which ye have not received, or another gospel, which ye have not accepted, ye might well bear with him." And 2 Corinthians 6:17,18 "Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing: and I will receive you, And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty." Cote, one day you'll look back on this and realize that the decision you made affected your whole life. Will it be the right decision? You only have one life and many who will follow your example... be it good, or bad. Just cry out to God right now and say "Lord! Help Thou mine unbelief!!!" And He will, Cote. He will.

 

[Cote Dawg]

Listen to me you all... I AM a friend in Jesus, if my fiancé isn't then I will break off from her if that is God's will. No matter how dark, evil, detestable - Jesus does NOT turn his back upon any mortal soul. He stays beside God and other's turn their back on him. Jesus will always leave the door open for you to come in. If I lose friends of Jesus due to sin - so what? I can come back! Our redeemer is that good to us! The church doors are always open. For us to turn our back on someone is for them to close their eyes and walk out. So I leave you with this question. Did you ever turn your back on the Devil? Did Jesus?

 

[Cote Dawg]

Jesus extends his hands to you. He lifts you up in all his grace. He gives us a change in the way we have been living. But for me, he has directed me to my own path that I like to refer to as a calling for me. And that would be to stay with Caroline... For now anyways.

 

[SBNmediamember]

Jesus extends his hands to you. He lifts you up in all his grace. He gives us a change in the way we have been living. But for me, he has directed me to my own path that I like to refer to as a calling for me. And that would be to stay with Caroline... For now anyways.

Cote,
In my last relationship, I wanted it to work so badly that I also believed it was my "calling" to evangelize my sweetheart. But, day by day, I found the usual. A blank stare and the same old same old. There was no striving for the things of God. Not even so much as initiating Grace at mealtime. For that man was living his Christianity by riding on my coat tails. Yes, Jesus loves and will not turn His back on us. But He also cannot bless sin. So you will be placing yourself in that spot just like an alcoholic who thinks he can sit in a bar. If you don't feed your soul with the unadulterated Word of God, you will feed your soul with vain philosophies. Be careful. Jesus was not a friend of the Devil. So if we play with the Devil, then we will get burned. The Bible doesn't warn for nothing. It still says: "Thou shalt not tempt the Lord Thy God." Perhaps the reasons that you ever even "felt" your check was because of all the Word of God you were receiving from Christian brothers and sisters. As "Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the Word of God." That's all I'm saying. As well, if turning away from someone is necessary for a season so their eyes can be opened, then that's probably why the Scripture was given. It protects saints from becoming sounding boards to those who enjoy chasing their own tail. Can you see the fruitlessness in that? We must exercise wisdom. For even Jesus could do no mighty works in a certain town because of their unbelief and had to move on. But the Holy Spirit will remain to continue prodding as long as there's still breath. But He won't be able to work if Faith isn't properly placed in the Cross as that's a LAW He must adhere to (Romans 8:2). Think about it, Cote. You don't ever want to be out of the Lord's Will. The song says: "Pass Me Not O Gentle Savior, Hear My Humble Cry." And it can happen if we go our own way and not Christ's. Don't be offended. The Bible says that if we rebuke a wise man, then he will be wiser still. But if we rebuke a fool, we will smart for it. That's the Bible and not me. (And, yes, God does not retain friendly relations with the Devil. For the Devil is our adversary and will ultimately be thrown into the Lake of Fire. For all eternity...no more chances. God will do this so His children will never be tempted by him again.) By the way, if I may ask, what Bible version are you reading? Because if you're not reading from the original manuscripts, then you may very well be feeding on adulterated versions that cannot possibly steer you the right way...like empty calories in junk food...no )

 

[SBNmediamember]

(Cote, and all...I made a mistake by not realizing the page needed to be refreshed, so I did copy and paste the edited version of the above to include Scipture verses. So please ignore the first version and read the second? I'm learning.)

Jesus extends his hands to you. He lifts you up in all his grace. He gives us a change in the way we have been living. But for me, he has directed me to my own path that I like to refer to as a calling for me. And that would be to stay with Caroline... For now anyways.

Cote,
In my last relationship, I wanted it to work so badly that I also believed it was my "calling" to evangelize my sweetheart. But, day by day, I found the usual. A blank stare and the same old, same old. There was no striving for the things of God. Not even so much as initiating Grace at mealtime. For that man was living his Christianity by riding on my coat tails. Yes, Jesus loves and will not turn His back on us. But He also cannot bless sin. So you will be placing yourself in that spot just like an alcoholic who thinks he can sit in a bar. If you don't feed your soul with the unadulterated Word of God, you will feed your soul with vain philosophies. Be careful. Jesus was not a friend of the Devil. So if we play with the Devil, then we will get burned. The Bible doesn't warn for nothing. It still says: "Thou shalt not tempt the Lord Thy God" Matthew 4:7. Perhaps the reasons you have even "felt" your checks was because of all the Word of God you were receiving from Christian brothers and sisters. As "Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the Word of God" Romans 10:17. That's all I'm saying. As well, if turning away from someone is necessary for a season so their eyes can be opened, then that's probably why the Scripture was given. It protects saints from becoming sounding boards to those who enjoy chasing their own tail. Can you see the fruitlessness in that? We must exercise wisdom. For even Jesus Christ could do no mighty works in a certain town because of their unbelief, and had to move on. Perhaps Matthew 11:20-30 would be an example with Jesus even pronouncing "woes!" But the Holy Spirit will remain to continue prodding as long as there's breath left. However, He (the Holy Spirit) won't be able to work if Faith isn't properly placed in the Cross, as that is LAW that He must adhere to (Romans 8:2). Think about it, Cote. You don't ever want to be out of the Lord's Will. The song says: "Pass Me Not O Gentle Savior, Hear My Humble Cry." It can happen if we go our own way, and not Christ's. The Heavens will be as brass to our prayers. Don't be offended. The Bible says, "Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee: rebuke a wise man and he will love thee" Proverbs 9:8. Why not help yourself to that entire chapter? So it's the Bible and not me. And you will either believe God's Word, or you will be an unbeliever...cut, and dry. (And, yes, God does not retain friendly relations with the Devil. For the Devil is our adversary and will ultimately be thrown into the Lake of Fire. For all eternity...no more chances. God will do this so His children will never be tempted [by the devil] again.) By the way, if I may ask, what Bible version are you reading? Because if you're not reading from the original manuscripts, then you may very well be feasting on adulterated versions that cannot possibly steer you the right way...like empty calories in junk food...no nutrition, just fluff. And if that doesn't make sense, then try fixing a Chevy with a Ford manual. It might work a little, but I wouldn't bank on it. Be wise, Cote, and be strong "in the LORD." He will help you do the right things...ALWAYS, "IF" you remain humble before Him...that word "IF" making the whole thing conditional, my friend.

 

[Cote Dawg]

Why, how could I do this to myself? I was ignorant. Unaware. Blinded by my own goodness? So much that I wanted to save her. But God can do that. I leave it up to him. When she was saved I was so crushed. I remember that moment. To myself I am and was and will be experiencing life. She is still playing games in the heart. She plays around the edges of good and evil things, and sometimes she takes a step over there to badness. I guess it's time. Thank you all. I hope I can make it through this alive

 

[SBNmediamember]

Psalm 73:22-28
"So foolish was I, and ignorant: I was as a beast before Thee. 23 Nevertheless I am continually with Thee: Thou hast holden me by my right hand. 24 Thou shalt guide me with Thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory. 25 Whom have I in heaven but Thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside Thee. 26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever. 27 For, lo, they that are far from Thee shall perish: Thou hast destroyed all them that go a-******* from Thee.
28 But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all Thy works.

Cote, We've all been there. This psalmist, Asaph, was there. Nope. There's nothing new under the sun. Your God is SOOOO powerful and He's just waiting to show you just how much. He'll give you a plan to make it, brother. He did me and I've never been happier. For with each trial, we grow stronger. Glory to God that trials come to only make us strong. And we put those who cannot see, in the capable Hands of our Lord Who Alone is able. For in His time, He makes all things beautiful. Her true salvation will come if you don't stop believing. But there comes that time that we must let go...and let God. He'll take care of her...and He'll take care of you.

 

[sweet_mother]

Why, how could I do this to myself? I was ignorant. Unaware. Blinded by my own goodness? So much that I wanted to save her. But God can do that. I leave it up to him. When she was saved I was so crushed. I remember that moment. To myself I am and was and will be experiencing life. She is still playing games in the heart. She plays around the edges of good and evil things, and sometimes she takes a step over there to badness. I guess it's time. Thank you all. I hope I can make it through this alive

WOOOO!! GO COTE lol go on and get yourself a good girl trust me she'll love you and God earnestly.

 

[Cote Dawg]

This thread needs to stop. There is no other girl for me. She loves me dearly. And she loves God, there's no denying that. We all have the same love of the father for one another. I'm sorry I betrayed some of you in here but this thread wasn't meant for me. I am forever grateful that I have you all here but as for me, I must work out my own demons. That only GOD can solve! WITH HER OR WITHOUT, I DON'T CARE. I love her and would do all I could to strengthen her faith, her bond, her struggle is in me and I am in control here. I know. We know each other. 4 years not enough for ya? I can't stand the thought of her NOT being the one for me. How could any of you possibly know that???

 

[SBNmediamember]

This thread needs to stop. There is no other girl for me. She loves me dearly. And she loves God, there's no denying that. We all have the same love of the father for one another. I'm sorry I betrayed some of you in here but this thread wasn't meant for me. I am forever grateful that I have you all here but as for me, I must work out my own demons. That only GOD can solve! WITH HER OR WITHOUT, I DON'T CARE. I love her and would do all I could to strengthen her faith, her bond, her struggle is in me and I am in control here. I know. We know each other. 4 years not enough for ya? I can't stand the thought of her NOT being the one for me. How could any of you possibly know that???

Don't work out your own demons, Cote. You'll lose every time. All I know is... that I'm SO GLAD I'm not 20 anymore. Hallelujah! Will remember you in my prayers and, from here, I'll make the first effort to stop the thread. Because you're right about that one. Prayers. SBNmediamember

 

[Cote Dawg]

Yeah well I'm glad I don't have to listen to you any more. I've got God. We all have God. Telling me you are glad you are not 20 is not very great advice. Most people would tell me to live it up while I still can. You might have changed your priorities a little but you people seemed to have a smug grudged out in your own idk, culture, gender, this isn't where I belong, sorry. I deserve supportive intuition, not old people maturity. I take care of responsibilities as I see fit for myself. I won't be glad to be out of my 20s! I will be glad to see the end of this! bondage! confusion. This narrow highway leads me to heaven. Sayonara!!

 

[sweet_mother]

Yeah well I'm glad I don't have to listen to you any more. I've got God. We all have God. Telling me you are glad you are not 20 is not very great advice. Most people would tell me to live it up while I still can. You might have changed your priorities a little but you people seemed to have a smug grudged out in your own idk, culture, gender, this isn't where I belong, sorry. I deserve supportive intuition, not old people maturity. I take care of responsibilities as I see fit for myself. I won't be glad to be out of my 20s! I will be glad to see the end of this! bondage! confusion. This narrow highway leads me to heaven. Sayonara!!

Don't start drama Cote, he was only trying to tell you the truth and help. Your too busy morphing what you think is right... God doesn't like people assuming his commandments when it's not true. You need to leave if your not happy with what we said to you. Good luck with your girl.

 

[SBNmediamember]

I appreciate Sweet_Mother and realize I shouldn't have said what I said and I'm sorry. Also, I'm a 59 year old single woman and know first hand the difficulties of relationships. Married two times to the same man, lasting a total of 34 years, I honestly know the pitfalls of marrying too early as well as not being a Christian at the time. In the second marriage to this same man, I was a weak Christian, not really understanding salvation, not knowing the least thing about being unevenly yoked. Our daughter suffered terribly for all this. For what the Bible says is true: "My people perish for lack of knowledge" Hosea 4:6 May the Lord help this young man take the Lord at His Word and come to a healthy fear (reverence) of how Holy it is. I hope he will forgive me for any hurt I've caused. As well, I'm sorry to all. We must learn from our mistakes or repeat them over and over again, which I'm sure is someone's quote but, more than likely, the majority of us have learned this lesson just through life experiences. Be blessed, all. Psalm 34:10 still comes to mind "The young lions do lack and suffer hunger: but they that seek the Lord shall not want any good thing."

 

[sweet_mother]

I appreciate Sweet_Mother and realize I shouldn't have said what I said and I'm sorry. Also, I'm a 59 year old single woman and know first hand the difficulties of relationships. Married two times to the same man, lasting a total of 34 years, I honestly know the pitfalls of marrying too early as well as not being a Christian at the time. In the second marriage to this same man, I was a weak Christian, not really understanding salvation, not knowing the least thing about being unevenly yoked. Our daughter suffered terribly for all this. For what the Bible says is true: "My people perish for lack of knowledge" Hosea 4:6 May the Lord help this young man take the Lord at His Word and come to a healthy fear (reverence) of how Holy it is. I hope he will forgive me for any hurt I've caused. As well, I'm sorry to all. We must learn from our mistakes or repeat them over and over again, which I'm sure is someone's quote but, more than likely, the majority of us have learned this lesson just through life experiences. Be blessed, all. Psalm 34:10 still comes to mind "The young lions do lack and suffer hunger: but they that seek the Lord shall not want any good thing."

I know your sorry but don't be at the same time. We tried helping and in the end he doesn't seem happy with his decisions which is why he keeps going back and forth. He doesn't know who he loves more God or that girl but, he'll see soon who will really be there for him in the end. I'm 22 not far from Cote but let's just say I've had enough relationships to know that who I'm with is who I love but who I love more is Him, who created me. I don't sugar coat things and I told my Fiance that God will always come first in our marriage. He doesn't take it as a problem but he appreciates my devotion to the Almighty Lord because he knows that if I love God that much, I'll use the same heart to love him as well. Heck! I respected my Fiances decision for no sex and honestly back than it would have been a big deal for me. He's not ready to fully give himself to God or he wouldn't make it a big deal is what I'm explaining.

 

[Cote Dawg]

SBN don't feel bad, you did try and I give you props for the goodness in your eyes. I am praying for the fear of God. Yes I love this woman. I chose her. I can have both of them, her and God. What happened was I got carried away with the things working in my heart, tried to explain a little but failed to show you any sign of assurance in my life, that we are busy doing all we know what to do. I don't mean to sugarcoat things, it's just natural to me. Sometimes people have to learn for themselves and this is one of those things in my life that is precious, a memory, I might have a lack of wisdom and selfish desire and vanity, all men fall short of the glory. In all honesty, I feel like you are the ones confusing me for me introducing this topic. I think when you are in harmony with God's love, he allows you to do anything you want, and encourages it more. You don't have to have a public ceremony to know that God is with the both of you now, that he allows access because people witnessed it, no, love is between two people, and not one person on Earth can tell me if I am meant to be there with her and God OR NOT, unless we are to be married with a group, and to me, that would be the congregation. Some are married and don't know the difference, they still feel a lack, a void! It's just like in Titanic, they had sex on the boat because they know it was true love! You don't have to be married, as long as you are following according to what God has planned for you then all ends well. See, to me, I love all, and she is that all, she is that world of love I bare for you all. I hope we can see it through, it wrecks me when people think I shouldn't be with her. But we have had many spiritual experiences, we've been through a lot together, and I hope for there to be more. If I can't have her then nobody will, and I know she will feel the same if I ask her. She counsels me, she guards my emotions from others, and I fear God leaving US. The door is always open, there is nothing to fear. The evil doer has no power over me. Choose sin, choose suffering. We all must die some day. And if you believe in Jesus and put your whole faith in the lord above... Sorry if I can't express it well enough, but I choose life. I cling to my salvation, and even in death, I triumph for the lord hath faith in me. Again, this thread should be over and done with. I learned a valuable lesson about strengthening my relationships and personal protection with God. This is the last time I post anything here. I will remember you all and revisit this from time to time, and it is my wish that one day this mountain can be moved by faith and God the almighty!!!

 

[SBNmediamember]

Sweet_Mother,

That's a nice name. How did you decide on it? And, by the way, should we be using this particular thread? I mean, I think Chastity is still a strong issue not only for you, but for me and perhaps many others. But it "was" Cote's thread, so what's the rule on our continuing right where he left off? I sincerely thought you might at least be thirty-something...so sorry for making you older. But the maturity in your responses seemed to make it appear that way. Not that anyone has to be older to be wiser. It just goes to show what Christ can do through young people who are yielded to Him! Look at David in the Bible, the shepherd "boy" who slew Goliath! And how about Joseph who dealt with so many conflicts and ended up taking care of not only his family, but people from many regions of the world. Right next to Pharoah! These are no small potato stories, for our God is so strong in those who will seek Him above all else. And, even with my own age of 59, there are days when I simply have to ask the Lord to give me wisdom beyond my years! Yes, ma'am! So I'm very happy to meet you. I've never done a forum before and feel like I've jumped in head first when a friend warned that I should take it slow, read other peoples' threads, and only THEN proceed slowly without placing people on the defense. Well, ha, I failed in all counts. But I'm still hoping for the best, which I believe I got. For, although Cote was the first to make me his friend, I still feel I might have one in you. And when I see Cote in my friend box, I don't think it's a waste, because it will always remind me to pray for him. Have you any suggestions what else I might learn about this site now that I'm getting a little more confident? I think I'll like forums compared to dating sites (which are the PITS). But I needed human interaction as I care for two mentally challenged men in my home 24/7. So I needed folks to talk to who could appreciate the Lord. Are you able to tell me why your fiance said no sex when he's not yet saved? Did I understand that correctly? I find it interesting, that's all. You can call me SBN for short, if you'd like, and I wouldn't mind giving my real name.