I've spent a lot of time reading the forums here and I find myself posting because A. I agree with most everything I've read posted here on this topic and B. I am in desperate need of some advise. Please know I am not trying to whine or gossip, I just don't know how to ask without sharing a little about my life...
I am very pregnant and not long after we found out we were expecting my husband had a large list of very very strong opinions on how we should handle the pregnancy. Although in some cases I strongly disagreed with him (and in some cases the doctors disagreed with him) I am a strong believer in submitting to my husband, and since he could not be talked out of anything I set about the task of finding someone who would attend the birth with so many unusual requests. After weeks of prayer and research I managed to find health care providers who would tolerate his preferences (which I presented as our preferences at his request). I thought at last I could relax and enjoy my rapidly growing baby belly, but now he is asking for something I am struggling with. He is asking that we refuse to get a birth certificate and social security number for our child. In our state it is explicitly illegal to not obtain a birth certificate and I believe we will be barred from leaving the hospital without a ss#. While the previous choices he order me to make as his submissive wife I managed to accept, this one seems different. Would it be sinful for me to disobey him in order to keep the laws of my state? He says the laws are wrong, but it would be me as the birth mother who would face criminal charges. I haven't felt good about his other decisions, but this just feels out right wrong. It has caused me a lot of emotional and physical pain so far to follow his wishes and I don't take this lightly, but I just don't know if I can keep this up, especially if it might mean being seperated from my baby soon after it is born. Has anybody else been put in this position before? Does anyone have any advise to offer. Thanks
mamabean
I am very pregnant and not long after we found out we were expecting my husband had a large list of very very strong opinions on how we should handle the pregnancy. Although in some cases I strongly disagreed with him (and in some cases the doctors disagreed with him) I am a strong believer in submitting to my husband, and since he could not be talked out of anything I set about the task of finding someone who would attend the birth with so many unusual requests. After weeks of prayer and research I managed to find health care providers who would tolerate his preferences (which I presented as our preferences at his request). I thought at last I could relax and enjoy my rapidly growing baby belly, but now he is asking for something I am struggling with. He is asking that we refuse to get a birth certificate and social security number for our child. In our state it is explicitly illegal to not obtain a birth certificate and I believe we will be barred from leaving the hospital without a ss#. While the previous choices he order me to make as his submissive wife I managed to accept, this one seems different. Would it be sinful for me to disobey him in order to keep the laws of my state? He says the laws are wrong, but it would be me as the birth mother who would face criminal charges. I haven't felt good about his other decisions, but this just feels out right wrong. It has caused me a lot of emotional and physical pain so far to follow his wishes and I don't take this lightly, but I just don't know if I can keep this up, especially if it might mean being seperated from my baby soon after it is born. Has anybody else been put in this position before? Does anyone have any advise to offer. Thanks
mamabean