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SignUp Now!Sadeyes said:;74686
This morning, I have still been in pain, but it hasn't been as acute as last night. I have been able to sit in the garden which was lovely.
The most amazing thing happened while I was outside. I was talking to God and I actually had a glimpse of his love for me and in that moment, I was glad to be alive!
Now for you, that might not be a big deal, but for me, it was AWESOME!!!!!
Thank you for all of your prayers.
I have been able to sit in the garden which was lovely.
The most amazing thing happened while I was outside. I was talking to God and I actually had a glimpse of his love for me and in that moment, I was glad to be alive!
For my entire life, I have wanted to be dead. Until this morning, I can not remember a time when I have ever felt anything other than a desire to die. That doesn't mean that I have gone around being miserable all the time, far from that in fact, but my deepest desire, from my earliest memories, has always been to die. The pain that I now live with has just reinforced that desire.
That is why in that moment when I had a glimpse of God's love for me, it was also a miracle that I could say that I was glad to be alive.
Thank you for all the encouragement in your posts.
This morning, I wrote:
The most amazing thing happened while I was outside. I was talking to God and I actually had a glimpse of his love for me and in that moment, I was glad to be alive!
In those two sentences, there are in fact two miracles mentioned (four, if you count being outside and talking to God) - the second of which, nobody has commented on!!
I was thinking about this just a few minutes ago and wondered why this was so. Maybe I am wrong, but I concluded that as you don't know me, you would have no understanding of the significance of these words:
I was glad to be alive!
For my entire life, I have wanted to be dead. Until this morning, I can not remember a time when I have ever felt anything other than a desire to die. That doesn't mean that I have gone around being miserable all the time, far from that in fact, but my deepest desire, from my earliest memories, has always been to die. The pain that I now live with has just reinforced that desire.
That is why in that moment when I had a glimpse of God's love for me, it was also a miracle that I could say that I was glad to be alive.
Thank you for all of your prayers.
I hope that it is still OK to ask for prayer.
Tomorrow I have got an appointment with the doctor and this is always difficult for me. It basically reinforces how ill I am and I don't like thinking about it.
Thank you