Greetings and God's Peace Jayna. Welcome to the site. There are many here that are proficient in the Word of God. I am not one of them. I just know in Whom I have put my hope, and in Whom I have put my trust... Jesus Christ.
I relate to being at rock bottom though.,I've been to bottoms that few survive. God is merciful indeed.
Being honest; those bottoms that I had reached were caused by my own self seeking and indifference to others; emphasized by many broken promises, fierce resentments, and callous disregard for others. That being the case, when I surrendered and repented, no one that "knew me when" took it seriously, and indeed even to this day there are those that would rather remember and reject the unsaved me, than acknowledge the man that God's mercy is turning me into. As painful as that is, I have to acknowledge their right to that opinion, Who is in Charge, Trust In His Will; and allow Him to work on healing the injuries I had inflicted on others. False promises and insincere attempts had made my words cheap. I have to live it now... not speak it
What I also have to do is acknowledge my part, ask forgiveness of those I had harmed; be willing to make amends; and to pray for them, not expecting to be welcomed with open arms, but always willing to extend the same Mercy that God has given me. And I have to accept that things happen on God's Time schedule.... not my own.
God knows us better than we know ourselves; His Light cuts through every dark space in us. He understands our impatience, and Praise Him for His! What I have learned was that I first had to establish my relationship with the King, before I could deal with relationships with others. Trust God; seek His face.... the rest will fall into place