Ed, not for sure what you meant by I have been in Hell. If life brought so much pain for you, I'm sorry for your suffering. But even today through it all Jesus can help you. If this is what you meant, I pray that you will find Jesus through it all. Suffering without Jesus today brings no Hope in one's life but in the presence of our Lord there is hope.
Your sister in Christ, Trish
What I meant to say is that my life was like a living hell before coming to the Lord. Sometimes after I came to the Lord I thought I was walking through hell itself, but those times were actually a time of great testing. You know how it is? You feel like the Lord has abandoned you, or you tend to think that perhaps you just weren't making the grade the grade as a Christian, yet even though you had doubts, you still carried on.
I've been in some intense spiritual battles that have caused me to question my faith, and thinking that I might not be saved after all, or maybe I have denied my faith completely, has caused me a lot of pain.
For a number of years I have had a form of sleep apnea that has prevented me from attending church. I tried to get it under control by attending a sleep clinic, but I can't handle the machine that I need to be hooked to every night, and I can't afford any of the corrective or helpful operations, so I am missing out on church and that fellowship.
The internet, especially TalkJesus, has helped with the fellowship, but I really wish I could physically hang out with my brothers and sisters.
I don't mean to sound like I am complaining, as I've suffered with this all my life, and have gotten used to it, but I really wish I could meet some Christians in town that I could hang out with.
Also, I've found myself in a couple of situations where I
have found Christians to fellowship with, but they turned out to be rather selfish, high-minded individuals who only wanted to drag me down spiritually and mentally and use me for their own needs.