I'm terrified I blasphemed the Holy Spirit — Scrupulosity, family idolatry, and demonic dreams

[Kate1009]

Hi everyone. I'm a Christian struggling with what I believe is scrupulosity/religious OCD, and I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.

I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.

Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.

Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.

After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.

That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.

Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.

One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking, I mumbled a blasphemous word against the Holy Spirit out loud. I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.

Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.

I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.

 

[NBTT]

"Get thee behind me, Satan" Matthew 16:23

I hate it

I've seen theologians who say that the fact that you hate it shows that you still have the Holy Spirit. Pray that satan's influence diminishes and that the Holy Spirit's influence increases.

Others here have more knowledge about spiritual warfare. They will surely chime in.

 

[Gothedral]

I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.

Hi @Kate1009 ️ First, you have correctly identified the intruders. Second, from personal experience, a combination of psychological & pastoral care helps me. Jesus Christ is Above all things. Let Jesus heal you of these things. Set your fears down at His feet, and let God handle it, and be at peace.

I had changed healthcare professionals and church-hopped from real fear in the past, too. I don't think I'm the only one who let the temporal things worry me to that point. But Jesus and His Love are Eternal. I don't know what sinning against the Holy Spirit could possibly be; especially in your situation, sister. Oppression and persecution comes with being a faithful Christian, but your soul belongs to God.

I say ask your pastor how to "fast and pray" properly. Overall, trust Jesus.

 

[MedicBravo]

If legit:
Matthew gives the fuller context:

Matthew 12:31–32 (NIV)
“And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander can be forgiven, but blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven.”

Meaning: Every sin but one will be forgiven IF the person is truly repentant and asks Jesus for forgiveness. Only He knows if a person has changes or not.

Blasphemy:

Attributing God's work to Satan​

One of the clearest biblical examples of blasphemy occurs when Jesus' opponents saw His miracles but claimed they were accomplished through Satan.

Mark 3:28–30 (NIV)
“Truly I tell you, people can be forgiven all their sins and every slander they utter, but whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; they are guilty of an eternal sin.”

Simple. There is NO debate about what it is.
I won't sugarcoat it. If anyone here has done it, too bad. Your ticket is punched; permanently.
Anyone pushing "universalism" is evil.

 

[Bob Carabbio]

Hi everyone. I'm a Christian struggling with what I believe is scrupulosity/religious OCD, and I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.

I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.

Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.

Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.

After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.

That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.

Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.

One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking, I mumbled a blasphemous word against the Holy Spirit out loud. I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.

Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.

I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.

If you're CONCERNED about "Blaspheming the Holy Spirit" - then you haven't.
The Spirit is obviously working in your life. Sounds more like demonic oppression, which indicates the need for a deliverance ministry to get you free of it.

 

[Dave M]

I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.

Intrusive blasphemous thoughts,

If you did not speak the words, if you do not believe the words they are not your words, you are being played by the evil one.

Best protection you can do is to study Gods word every day, pray every day, fast regularly, with out constant time in the word you are defenseless and easily deceived.

 

[Curtis]

One of the greatest deceptions of the devil is in putting thought(s) into your mind and making you think they are yours.

 

[Kate1009]

Hi everyone. I'm a Christian struggling with what I believe is scrupulosity/religious OCD, and I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.

I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.

Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.

Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.

After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.

That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.

Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.

One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking,After the devil kept attacking me, I whispered that blasphemous word, but it didn’t go through my mind.I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.

Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.

I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.

sorry， I would like to add on- After the devil kept attacking me, I whispered that blasphemous word, but it didn’t go through my mind. In my article seems I said I speak load . Sorry .

 

[Kate1009]

If you did not speak the words, if you do not believe the words they are not your words, you are being played by the evil one.

Best protection you can do is to study Gods word every day, pray every day, fast regularly, with out constant time in the word you are defenseless and easily deceived.

Thank you. I remember that day, The devil kept attacking me, my jobs is very busy. I meet a person in my work place and I then an other attack throught from demon, then I whispered that blasphemous word against Holy spirit without even thinking it . I was very worried

 

[Brad Huber]

You probably didnt sin against the Holy Spirit in the sense that you are destined for hell now. I would recommend this, be determined to serve God regardless of whether you lost your salvation or not. Do not serve the interests of satan or self glory, Be determined to serve God even if you are a poor servant. Tell the Lord that if you are beyond His forgiveness, still find some way to let you serve Him and when the time comes you will gladly go into hell if your soul would corrupt heaven with its presence.

 

[Curtis]

The ultimate blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is in rejecting the "conviction" of the Holy Spirit that you do not believe in Jesus Christ.

Joh 16:7 Nevertheless I tell you the truth. It is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I depart, I will send Him to you.
Joh 16:8 And when He has come, He will convict the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:
Joh 16:9 of sin, because they do not believe in Me;

 

[Christ4Ever]

Dear @Kate1009

Praising God
Worshiping God/Singing as well
Reading the Word of God
Praying to God through the Son Jesus

Remember that when you came to Jesus, you were sealed by the Holy Spirit. He is with you and though there are things that you do (sin) that you shouldn't be doing, you, nor is anyone else here is perfect....yet! He is just to forgive you when you do wrong, and don't listen when those negative thoughts crop up, about grieving the Holy Spirit. It's like others here have told you. If you are worried about grieving the Holy Spirit, you haven't. You won't be concerned about it if you had!

You are a new Creation "in Him"! Meaning that the things you used to do, are in the past, and not your NOW in Jesus. Always remember that. Because when you start doubting, then you are giving an opening for the adversary to feed that doubt, with lies! For that is what he has and brings against you. Oh, you can be oppressed, but then that is why I mentioned those things to do in the opening, that you should be doing anyway!

They surely do not like you reading the Word of God, Praising Him, and bringing yourself closer to Him! After all Jesus is your Sheperd! He takes care of His sheep. Now, if there are bad influences close to you, wolves, then pray to God! Do not give them room to misdirect you. It's not easy, especially if they happen to be family. Still, in Christ Jesus, you can! For you have Victory in Jesus! Battles continue, but we know the ending is that God Wins! That is why you keep in reading God's Word. If it doesn't make sense, pray that He will grant you understanding. After all you have the Holy Spirit who will guide you to knowing!

Read Psalm 23!
[Psa 23:1-6 ESV] – 1 The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.
3 He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Seek other believers, who are well grounded in the Word of God. If a church doesn't study the Word, then pray for finding one that does, and keep looking, because in these days, they may not be that many, but they are out there.

It may seem at times that you are all alone. You are not! I know you will have those here who will be praying for you Kate! Stay strong in the faith in Jesus, and even if you have to go back to the Cross, falling on your knees, with tears running down your face, then do so! Nothing wrong with that Little Sister. Others have gone through what you are going through. Remember...

[1Jo 4:4 ESV] – 4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.

So, find another Sister in Christ Jesus, to connect with. Even here on Talk Jesus there are Godly women that I'm sure will be willing to help you in this. Just don't let the negative thoughts take over. Be proactive in having an environment that glorifies God and continue to do the things that will help you grow closer in your walk with Jesus dear sister.

Remember you are Loved!
With the Love in Christ Jesus.
YBIC/Moderator
Nick
\o/

 

[joestue]

After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.

That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks

what makes you think this spirit was from God?

 

[Kate1009]

what makes you think this spirit was from God?

Hi Joestue,

I can't tell... She sometimes shows up in my dreams... One day she told me to stop asking her questions, saying she's getting old and hadn't slept for a day... But angels don't need sleep... Maybe it's just symbolic.

 

[Gothedral]

I can't tell... She sometimes shows up in my dreams... One day she told me to stop asking her questions, saying she's getting old and hadn't slept for a day... But angels don't need sleep... Maybe it's just symbolic.

True faith is not anti-intellectual; it makes full use of the sciences, history, logic, imagination, and emotions. Clearly, Christ is present in you and your journey. @Kate1009 , you already believe in Almighty Jesus and seek understanding Him. You see His yoke is easy, your burdens are light.

"Through faith you are all children of God in Christ Jesus." - Galatians 3:26 (NABRE)

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not from you; it is the gift of God." - Ephesisans 2:8

"Jesus said... 'Everything is possible to one who has faith.' Then the boy's father cried out, 'Lord, I do believe; help my unbelief!'" - Saint Mark 9:23-24

I add you to my prayer lists, that you may be comforted in deliverance.

 

[Christ4Ever]

Hi Joestue,

I can't tell... She sometimes shows up in my dreams... One day she told me to stop asking her questions, saying she's getting old and hadn't slept for a day... But angels don't need sleep... Maybe it's just symbolic.

Dear Kate,
I pray this finds you in uplifted Spirit!
I shared 1 John 4:4 in my other post, but there is more to that chapter to know. I will share some more of that Chapter, since you appear even in dreams to encountering some sort of being of some type (unknown). These additional verses will help you in this. Remember them, and make them part of you, and you'll be able to use them when you find yourself in these dreams and don't know what to say (scripture). The more of the Word of God that you can know, the more that is available to you to remember even when sleeping! I pray for you and that you'll continue to grow in knowledge of the Word of God, and your walk with the Lord Jesus Christ!

[1Jo 4:1-6 ESV] –
1 Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.
2 By this you know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God,
3 and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you heard was coming and now is in the world already.
4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
5 They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world, and the world listens to them.
6 We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error.

With the Love in Christ Jesus dear Kate.
YBIC/Moderator
Nick
\o/

 

[Kate1009]

Dear Kate,
I pray this finds you in uplifted Spirit!
I shared 1 John 4:4 in my other post, but there is more to that chapter to know. I will share some more of that Chapter, since you appear even in dreams to encountering some sort of being of some type (unknown). These additional verses will help you in this. Remember them, and make them part of you, and you'll be able to use them when you find yourself in these dreams and don't know what to say (scripture). The more of the Word of God that you can know, the more that is available to you to remember even when sleeping! I pray for you and that you'll continue to grow in knowledge of the Word of God, and your walk with the Lord Jesus Christ!

[1Jo 4:1-6 ESV] –
1 Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.
2 By this you know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God,
3 and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you heard was coming and now is in the world already.
4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
5 They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world, and the world listens to them.
6 We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error.

With the Love in Christ Jesus dear Kate.
YBIC/Moderator
Nick
\o/

Hey, thank you. I am happy I could be one of Jesus' kids, but recently it's been a real attack.


I remember when I was five, the Lord told me I can be with Him after I die. I wish the Lord sees my struggle today.

 

[JunoTheServant]

Hi everyone. I'm a Christian struggling with what I believe is scrupulosity/religious OCD, and I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.

I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.

Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.

Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.

After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.

That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.

Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.

One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking, I mumbled a blasphemous word against the Holy Spirit out loud. I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.

Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.

I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.

Relax

You haven't blasphemed the holy spirit. The holy spirit Jesus was talking about is his words because his words are spirit and they are life John 6: 63. Everything you're going through seems to be based on some vision. My question is...What are you reading from the bible? Do you read daily? If you teach against what is written in God's holy book that's when you blaspheme the holy ghost.

 

[joestue]

Hi Joestue,

I can't tell... She sometimes shows up in my dreams... One day she told me to stop asking her questions, saying she's getting old and hadn't slept for a day... But angels don't need sleep... Maybe it's just symbolic.

I once spontaneously called my fmr neighbor up and we had a few drinks, talked for an hour or so.

Towards the end of the conversation he said what amounts to:
"maybe that's why you called me.... "my black female guardian angel visited me in a dream last night and told me don't worry about anything, you're just a spirit having a human experience".

Well.. let me try to say this nicely.. there are no black female angels. I am skeptical if their are female anything in the spiritual realm, but they do try to pretend sometimes. So far the only interactions I've had with women, through the spiritual realm, were living humans.

Basically, while I don't doubt God may have opened your eyes to an angel fighting some spiritual wars on your behalf, it looks like that was a deception, or a different spirit pretending to be another angel, got to you shortly after that first experience, and has produced all this confusion.


anyhow spirits from God won't tell you to stop asking them questions, they don't get old.
don't try and rationalize any conflicting information as "symbolic"

if you demand the test from 1 john 4:2, a spirit from God will answer you before you even ask the question, because God can read your heart and mind. demons can't, they will wait for you to speak then get angry that you challenged them.

in my experience, any permutation of one word missing is a false answer, you need to hear all 9 words

I confess Jesus Christ is come in the flesh.

Is come, is past present future tense.

they will leave any single word out, confessing Christ came in the flesh, but won't admit it was Jesus. etc.

 

[Christ4Ever]

Hey, thank you. I am happy I could be one of Jesus' kids, but recently it's been a real attack.


I remember when I was five, the Lord told me I can be with Him after I die. I wish the Lord sees my struggle today.

Dear Sister Kate,
He does see your struggles. Just like He sees all that is happening to all His children/friends! How can He not when He is a part of us, who we are, and who we shall be.

Matthew 6:8 “Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”
(Jesus teaches that God already sees and knows every need and struggle.)

Matthew 10:29–31 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”

Sadly, but a truism is that humanity seems to learn better because of adversity, and not as much when everything is going great. When going through these tough times, instead of saying why is this happening to me, say "What does God want me to learn from this?" Then don't be shy about asking Him and saying "I'm not getting it Father. What is it that I should be receiving from going through this, that I'm just not getting?" Oh, and keep reading God's Word, because most times that is the way He will speak and answer your questions! Other times, He'll move someone into your life that you would never expect to know anything, about anything, and then they'll tell you something that will "ring a bell" in your mind, on what has been going on and waiting to get an answer to!

It's the old story about a man hanging off a cliff, and He prays to God to help him.
So, an ambulance comes by but the man says I waiting for God to help me.
Then a helicopter, and the man says the same thing.
This happens a couple of more times, and finally he falls to his death.
Well, when the man comes before God, and asks "Why didn't you help me?"
God answers: Well, I sent you an ambulance, a helicopter, and other things to help you, but you turned my help away everytime.

So, don't be surprised, how the help comes to you. You might even find it here on Talk Jesus, amongst your Brothers & Sisters in Christ Jesus, or some post from a member long gone from here. God does move in mysterious ways, that can have us scratching our heads about, but know that He is not derelict in helping us, and more importantly Loving us, even when we appear unloving to anyone else.

Stay faithful, and keep praying, and digging into His Word!

With the Love in Christ Jesus.
YBIC/Moderator
Nick
\o/