Hi everyone. I'm a Christian struggling with what I believe is scrupulosity/religious OCD, and I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin. I need help and I don't know where else to turn.
I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.
Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.
Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.
After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.
That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.
Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.
One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking, I mumbled a blasphemous word against the Holy Spirit out loud. I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.
Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.
I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.
Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.
I was born into a family that practiced idolatry. But thank God, when I was 5 years old, I had a dream where Jesus stood on the territory of my family's idolatry and said that after I die, I can be with Him.
Years later, I was called by the Lord, I repented, and I was born again by the Holy Spirit. The Lord sent an angel to fight spiritual warfare for me. I was being led very well by the Holy Spirit.
Until this July. I had a vivid dream where an angel of the Lord said that the Father loves me and that I will attend a glorious banquet in the future (I can't say more about this). When I woke up, I searched AI and found that this term does exist in the Bible. So I went back to sleep.
After I fell asleep, this spirit reminded me that I didn't know how serious this matter was — that I searched AI — and warned me not to tell anyone around me. I was terrified and said I wouldn't tell anyone.
That same night, the demonic dreams started. Evil spirits pretending to be my idol-worshipping family members, doing idolatrous activities in my old home. Every single night. I started waking up 3-4 times every night. Eventually I couldn't sleep at all. Sleep jerks.
Then 2 weeks later, intrusive blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit appeared in my mind. I didn't want to blaspheme. I fought hard against them. But the thoughts just kept coming.
One time, I was busy at work, exhausted, and without thinking, I mumbled a blasphemous word against the Holy Spirit out loud. I didn't mean it. I didn't want to say it. I hate it. But now I'm terrified I've committed the unforgivable sin.
Right now I feel like I'm in a wilderness. The Lord isn't answering me. I feel alone. And that time when I said it out loud — it was because the devil would not stop pushing blasphemous thoughts into my mind. I didn't want to say it. I was fighting it. But it came out. I'm terrified.
I told my local pastor, but he doesn't want to help me — he thinks my situation is too complicated.
Has anyone experienced anything like this? Intrusive blasphemous thoughts, saying something out loud without meaning to, demonic dreams related to family idolatry? How did you get through this? I'm really scared. Please help.
