Greetings dear brothers and sisters
I refer to a situation where a Christian family is struggling with a family member who smokes....the smoker being the male head of the family
The family have young children.
The smell of lingering smell of smoke in the room, on clothes and on the breath is horrible to the wife and children. Even though the smoking occurs outside....the smells linger for hours on the husband
There have been many promises of giving up over the years, which have never happened not even for a whole day. The wife knew of the smoking before marriage but was told it would stop....because she loved she trusted. And with each child born further promises but no fruition.
The false promises have led to mistrust.
Even more concern is raised now that evidence shows that "third hand" smoking......that is chemicals left in clothing fibres, the hair and the like are just as dangerous as "second hand" smoking
Prayers and practical advise on how the family can deal with this smelly issue which is affecting their marriage would be much appreciated.
@David holton
The Lord is able to deliver you from all these struggles David.
He loves you.
His power and strength are far above any worldly addiction.
Empty yor heart before Him in prayer
He will not fail you.
Blessings grace and peace
Smoking! The trickiest of all my demons, yo. Since I don't know the guy, I won't bother calling him out. Of course, even if I did know him, every addiction and everybody's personal struggle with it is different anyway, so instead, I'll call myself out.
I've used the old "justification" technique, myself. I smoke, but at least I'm not a violent alcoholic anymore. I smoke, but at least I don't freebase cocaine anymore. I smoke, but at least I'm killing myself, not anyone else. I could never drink a couple 40oz's of malt liquor, slam a half-pint of tequila, smoke some cocaine and then go drive to my kids' athletic events. I can, however, smoke a cigarette and go. The list goes on and on.
I'm also a realist. I know that, God willing, should I live to grow old, I will probably die from smoking. I mean, I could get hit by a bus this evening and die in a way that had nothing to do with smoking. Unless I dropped my cigarette and it started rolling and I chased it into the path of an oncoming bus, but still. Ha! But seriously, knowing the chances are high of me dying from smoking, and still not being able to quit? That's sad. It is also a testament to how powerful the addiction is. Someone telling me to "just stop" is like me telling someone who suffers from depression to "just be happy." I've never struggled with depression, so I cannot relate to what they're going through, but I believe it's real, and really hard. No doubt.
We don't get mad and yell at people with cancer, which is a disease, but we do tend to do that with people suffering from addiction, which is also a disease. It may be one we don't accept, or agree with, or understand, but we should still treat it the same way. With compassion, love and prayer. You know how everybody knows who the drunk is, except for the drunk? In his or her mind, they're not even the one with a problem, everyone else is. I know. I was the drunk for many years. Alcohol led to drugs led to crimes led to prison. Funny how that works.
Now? Now I have caffeine and nicotine as my last two vices. Am I any better than the drunk I see on my block every day bumming change, or all these kids I see smoking marijuana out in the open since it is now legal to do so? Nope. I'm just better than the me I used to be. Will people being mad at me, or saying I'm letting them down, make me quit smoking? No. Only Jesus Christ can break my chains, just as he broke all my other ones. The cliche is true;Jesus hates addiction, but loves the addict. Amen. So I will pray that the guy this post refers to will quit smoking, and I would ask that anyone who reads this reply would pray for me to quit smoking. Sometimes that's all we can do, but all the time it is the first thing we should do. Peace
