DO NOT sacrifice yourself for the law. In this sin damaged world unfortunately compromises have to be made, this is why Jesus died on the cross for our sins and to be victorious over death. Who knows how many men the lord has sent to you, for you to reject them. Just be careful here, just because people made bad marriage decisions previously should not preclude them from trying again with a Godly woman. Our God is merciful and understanding.
so I'm done with marriage. I will die a virgin FOR JESUS.
I can sympathize with that feeling but when I review myself I don't like at all the deeply reserved place it puts me in. Somehow I know it is not right. Marriage is serious serious business it takes you to a place no matter what, you can not return from, it changes you and alters your destiny, and no one really knows a person unless they live with them at close quarters with no way out. If you want my out in left field opinion this person did you a favor. You should thank God for the outcome. I still believe my original statement was true ( birds of a feather flock together ) The two you referenced will have trouble in the flesh. That is a Paulian statement but I don't recall where. I think you got the good deal, and you have a future. Don't be down or indignant I think you are the winner here.
This thread isn't about stopping any non-virgins from marrying virgins, let's make this clear. But my indignance and decision in this is valid and have solid ground, virgins have to make lots of sacrifices to marry a non-virgin, and suffer pain for no fault of theirs. If anything, a non-virgin should be grateful that a virgin will endure so much for them, remain humble and make sacrifices in return. But what I have seen often is a lack of such gratitude, even a selfish and ungodly attitude from non-virgins. They selfishly want to be forgiven without any or minimal cost, don't care that their own actions brought pain on someone innocent, and even shift blame/mock their partners to make themselves feel better. By telling their virgin partners they shouldn't be upset, their virgin partners are even denied the right to grieve about losing their partners' virginity to someone else. These selfish non-virgins disregard the cost of forgiveness - forgiveness that cost Jesus His very soul, as though God and their partner owe them forgiveness.
Forgiveness comes with a high cost - Jesus demonstrated that clearly. The least a non-virgin should do in return for that is to be as self sacrificial to their virgin partners as they can and accept the consequences of what they did - even King David who was favored by God suffered the death of his child for a one time sexual sin. When a non-virgin is all about shifting blame, escaping consequences and denying the pain he has caused to his virgin partner, his selfish attitude shows that he never truly repented. Without repentance there is no forgiveness even from God - saying a prayer is far from repentance when the heart is still selfish.
I believe you and the others are trying to persuade me not to turn down a non-virgin because there is a fear that you may face such rejection from someone you truly love. But being rejected like this is a very light consequence for sexual sins, compared to the loss of a child like David. If that does happen, you just have to accept it. David accepted even the loss of his child, is there any unfairness that you should accept rejection because of the mistakes you made? I don't think so.
God is wise, He knows that if people sin without any consequences they will never learn from their mistakes. If you touch the fire, you will get burned, suffer pain and have a long lasting scar on your skin. You accept the scar and its pain as a reminder of your mistakes and move on, that's how you mature.
