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Discussion in 'Feedback' started by aaroncam85, Apr 4, 2012.

  1. Is it me; maybe taking things too personally or do people really like to answer harshly when responding to threads?

    Maybe WE; including myself believe we have things nailed down; correct, right.

    God is love, i feel that needs to come across more.

    If someone needs to be rebuked, maybe a private message would be better, so non Christians and Christians are not discouraged.

    Also the private message may stop others entering the conversation and making it confusing, just a suggestion
  2. Any particular thread your referring to?
  3. nah, no thread in paticular, just an overall observation of the threads I have read.

    As i mentioned before, it might just be me, but if its not, then maybe something we can consider as a community.
  4. I've moved your thread from Ethics & Morality to the Feedback forum since this has nothing to do with ethics or morality.

    You know, if you have an issue with a thread or post, there is a report abuse button on the top right of each post. Its there for a purpose, let's use it and the mod will remove any offending posts or correct any member when necessary.
  5. ok, cool. was not aware of the abuse button. i don't find the posts offensive, i just thought they seemed a bit harsh at times.

    will use the abuse button from now on.
  6. Harsh Reply's.

    I myself have been guilty of Harsh replies. Normally when it's someone that has condemned someone else, or comes off as their doctrine is top supremo uno!!!

    I don't put down the person, I just use scriptures I know they can't answer.
    I am working on not doing that and wait it out a bit before responding.

    This is religion and people tend to get upset if you cross something they believe true about God. I have found there are scriptures that counter about every Doctrine out there that is common. I stick with one doctrine. God is good. I personally view the Word with this one thing in mind.

    The other thing, without love of each other, Then we lie if we say we also love God. Without love, even being right sounds like someone banging a bunch of trash can lids together.

    Jesus Is Lord.
  7. thanks, really appreciate the fact you took time to consider this and searched yourself, i think we are all guilty once and a while. feel we will progress in this area and it will be truly beneficial to our community here.

    thanks again.
  8. #8 Thiscrosshurts, Apr 7, 2012
    Last edited: Apr 7, 2012
    Actually that's a good prayer that we should be lifting up to God.
    Thank him always and in all ways for providing a Spirit of love,grace and fellowship in the Holy Spirit that those who come here can leave better prepared and refreshed.

    There is a difference between testing your theories and pushing them.
    Some times it's better to ask a question that we think they may not be able to answer.Some times they will have an unexpected answer that can(actually should) lead us to examine our own belief system.

    There is some value to the back and forth banter and even debates but they are of no value to those who are hurting or struggling to see God in this world.

    I learn something everyday that shapes and forms my beliefs,the big question is ,did I learn it from the living word or the dead world.

    The only thing I can think of is to have an arena with stringent engagement rules so that if you want your position or reasearch tested you can expect a professional response governed by love.
    The forum would have a warning that it is not recommended for those seeking encouragement.

    From what I've see even the most grueling debates also contain plenty of humor and wit,with occasional charm thrown in.
    I have learned when I am paying attention I can even learn things from people who I think are 85% wrong.

    What we think we know is not nearly important as the path we are pursuing in our seeking and knocking.
  9. great

    It would be great if everyone could defend what they believe, my experience is they just get upset, and are unequipped to answer your scripture, unless it's with some far out (NO SCRIPTURE) explanation someone else but them came up with.

    There are a few Rare and diligent that actually care if they can back up what they believe. I am one of them. It's at these times I learn the most from others, as they break down the Word, line upon line. Agree or not, it's these I respect the most as they care and love the Word.

    Rapture!!! Jesus is coming to take us away, Ha, Ha!!!!
    My Group believes this, but when asking them to prove it......... OH MY............ It's sad.

    Jesus Is Lord.
  10. You are quite right aaroncam85. Sometimes either the thread has dissolved into two untenable positions that all that is left one to do, is to see if they can have the other person stop replying This becomes especially true when…..should I even bring it up?.........why not……when the subject is salvation by grace, works or both! Yikes! If scripture were bullets, we’d all be dead!

    I am of the belief that “Iron sharpens Iron” but not everyone is made of iron and I keep that in mind. Besides the fact that I pray, agonize for hours, writing and rewriting, so as not to be reflect anything but the love of Christ, has been helpful. I don't in all honesty (won’t have it any other way) believe that the intent is to come across in the fashion you describe. It’s just the lack of writing skills (not meant to insult) or insufficient thought (also not meant to insult) is placed in how the person might receive such a communication.

    You, however, have done well to see that the value of the IM in communicating certain thoughts, as in not communicating the Love of Christ Jesus is a viable solution letting people know that they need to ease up (doesn't mean to change ones position). Just remember that sometimes, it will be well received and other times……not so well

    Not being perfect yet, I do also at times can be rather abrupt in my responses as well but I am trying brother

  11. Yes Christ4Ever that is often the case.

    Talk Jesus is an amazing ministry, reaching out worldwide to the saved and the unsaved...the aim should always be to write posts prayerfully to only ever glorify the name of the Lord, to proclaim His great love and mercy and the wonders of His grace and to share the unfailing promises found in His Word.

    It is when puffed up self comes in that things go wrong.
    Posts can become dominated with the proud 'I' rather than Christ.
    (I'm not referring to prayer requests etc where 'I' is used)

    We are nothing without Him
    Less self more Jesus

    Christ, only Christ, no idle word e'er falling,
    Christ, only Christ, no needless bustling sound;

    Christ, only Christ, no self-importance bearing,
    Christ, only Christ, no trace of I be found.

    Oh, to be saved from myself, dear Lord,
    Oh, to be lost in Thee,
    Oh, that it may be no more I,
    But Christ that lives in me*

    For no other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ
    1 Corinthians 3:11

    * Ada Whittington hymn
  12. I agree with aaroncam85.

    Sometimes, there are some replies here which gives you the idea that they say, "You are wrong, listen to me because I am right" rather than calmly prove their point by means of thoroughly-chosen words and biblical passages.

    James 1:19-20

    Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
  13. Working Together

    Then we as a family on TalkJesus must
    do what is necessary to keep these things
    from happening, and keeping the forum friendly.

    Its always a good idea to avoid the situations
    in the first place. When we feel like the situation
    is getting tense, avoid posting a counter response.
    Send them a private message to continue the conversation
    if anyone should like to, or send them a message saying
    that things were getting heavy and didn't want to end
    things badly and want to leave the issue alone.
    2 Timothy 2:23-24: "Don't have anything to do with foolish
    and stupid arguments, because you know they produce
    quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead,
    he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful."

    If the offending remark has already been made, report the
    post to mods so we can step in and take action.
    We take these things seriously and if they do in fact ignore
    the warnings to keep unity and peace within the forums,
    they will be suspended to think about their actions,
    if still continued, they could be banned.

    When a church body is in unity, Satan will do what
    he can to destroy the good in it. We must protect
    each other and keep each other in check or we will
    let him use our God given emotions and speech for
    ungodly purposes. It is always a good thing to pause
    before making a post and asking ourselves,
    "Is this something Jesus would be proud of?"
  14. Please keep in mind that this is a forum, a community of fallible human beings that have their own maturity level, understanding of Scripture, perception (or interpretation) and of course, even pride. Pride is the root of all evil.

    While I cannot control peoples' responses, tones and respect towards others, I can only limit these things by enforcing basic rules for all to follow, and when deemed necessary, ban any users causing ongoing strife. I occasionally may prune some posts as well that disrupt specific threads in question, to clean things up and keep the discussions going smoothly.

    So its easy to say "this forum so and so", but are you being part of the body of Christ and helping in a way you can? You can minimize strife, avoid it, use report post tool, chat via pm as dannibear mentioned.
  15. Compared to every other forum I've ever browsed and posted on, Talk-Jesus is by far, the most civil. It's unrealistic to ever expect perfect harmony, with many conflicting views on doctrine; but treating each other with basic respect should be a huge priority. Sometimes when annoyed or frustrated by a post, walking away and re-gaining composure is the smart decision. Advice I need to work on for myself, too.
  16. There have been quite a few times where I have written a long reply to a post, but before clicking on the "submit reply" button, I instead put my post in a notepad on my desktop, thought about it for a while and after rereading it decided against posting it.

    It took me a little while to figure out that my words aren't always (ever? LOL) flowing majestically forth, with life-changing prose, like King David's Psalms; neither is the TJ world waiting with baited breath for my next post!

    In other words, this isn't Talk Me, it is Talk Jesus! It's the pride thing Chad hit on. I want less of my posts to have the tone of "I'll tell you what's what", and more of "I'm learning right along with you". Is that tough to do at times? Sure it is, but as you said, if we make treating each other with respect a priority at least we'll be moving in the right direction.
  17. I put this as my facebook status yesterday and I believe it fits here.

    You have a choice. You have a choice in the way you will react to any and all people and situations. Sometimes a soft reply is better than a loud one.
  18. #18 jari, Apr 12, 2012
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2012
    people always in TJ tell me that i have no salvation or i have lost it or that i'm going to hell for not believing like they do.
    but it isn't surprising that they think so as there's wide variety of different types of christians in here. what's more surprising is that they have to say what they think. One member even sent me Private message telling me i have no change to get to heaven because i have apparently already lost my salvation.
    so far moderators haven't done anything about this though i reported it in PM.
    so it makes me wonder, i guess that's just the way this site is run. you can throw anything at others.. as long as it kept civil? and you'r polite?

    of course stating an only single way to be saved is more subtle way to condemn group of people who believe in different way.

    so again i do understand that's there's opinions. I just don't understand why it feels so personal... i guess it's just rough if your going to discuss the bible. If this were in church I think many pastors would not let people who speak here speak behind the pulpit. as they bring messages they are not in agreement with and condemn others according to their understanding of the bible.

    i'm sorry if this sounded bashful towards tj but I just wanted to say how i have felt in here.. not trying to point fingers. i'm just saying this so you can do whatever you wish with this imformation. i really dont expect anything else from christian web sites, but just saying how i have experienced things.
  19. Ok jari. 18,000 members on this site. Who are these "people" you're referring to? You make it sound like its the theme of the community here to tell a member they are not saved. That's not true.

    Secondly, you reported one person specifically via pm to me the other day and provided no proof of this person's accusation against you. What did you expect me to do? Did you follow up with that proof? You have not. Did you expect me to ban that person, whom no one else has reported?

    The only thing you followed up with me was this only yesterday:

    I had already specifically told you to provide the proof in my previous response Jari. I checked the logs and this so called pm was sent back in mid January, but you deleted it. I see only your reply back to this single person you mentioned to me. Why are you waiting 3 months? Why are you asking me to if you should report it when in this thread here you're claiming to have done so, when you haven't?

    You've been here for 5 years. I'm sure by now you know how to use the report post feature in the forums. You are constantly in the chat room and you're well aware there is a save chat log feature there as well should you want to report something. Why have you not done so? Its a simple thing to do.

    Your opinion is irrelevant to the purpose and overall atmosphere of this community. I say this because you're obviously complaining about a couple or so members. There are 18,000 of them here.

    That's nonsense. Me and the moderators are working every single day here doing our best. You show no appreciation, no respect with a comment like that. You literally paint a picture of the mods as if they sit around ignoring you, not caring. You have not reported the pm because it would have been cc'd to me from the mods and a thread would have been created internally in the mod room anytime a post is reported. You are not being honest, nor considerate whatsoever.

    Before pointing your finger the other way, ask yourself "what am I doing to serve the Lord". Start from the inside out brother.

    If someone tells you something unbiblical, you have an option of ignoring that and walking away from the conversation. There's no reason to go tell others that the world is on your case.
  20. #20 jari, Apr 12, 2012
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2012
    i did report it. and Brother mike responded back to me that if the person doesnt apoligize then there's nothing we can do. so that's why i felt your not doing anything... or not caring enough.

    i understand your defending your site Chad. but what i've experienced is not just few people. and regardless you accused me of finger pointing i never intentend to do that.

    i don't wish to argue anymore about this. i'm glad to see you have confidence in your site and moderators Chad, I really am.

    and i won't complain any futher. if there's nothing left in your database of which i reported then there's nothing to do about it. unless you wish to ask this person personally if it's true this has happened and is it typical for her pass condemnations like that.
    maybe she tells the truth. other than that there's nothing more i can do. but i do think it's wrong for her especially to have opinion that people who she thinks have lost salvation have lost it permanately . which again she told me is common practice for her. and which she thinks of some people she is actually ministering.

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