Should children be corporally punished?

[B-A-C]

Prov 13:1; A wise son accepts his father's discipline, But a scoffer does not listen to rebuke.

Prov 15:5; A fool rejects his father's discipline, But he who regards reproof is sensible.

Prov 19:18; Discipline your son while there is hope, And do not desire his death.

Prov 22:15; Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.

Prov 23:13; Do not hold back discipline from the child, Although you strike him with the rod, he will not die.

Heb 12:7; It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?

Heb 12:9; Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?

Heb 12:11; All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

Rev 3:19; 'Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent.

Prov 29:15; The rod and reproof give wisdom, But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.

Should children be punished?

 

[lawrenceb]

Check the KJV. It is God who "punishes," while we chasten and train.

Most folks have much misunderstanding about how to raise up Godly seed.

 

[Fragrant Grace]

Check the KJV. It is God who "punishes," while we chasten and train.

Most folks have much misunderstanding about how to raise up Godly seed.

Greetings lawrenceb

Can you explain a little more please.

Thank you

 

[Rev T.S.Perkins]

Ther have been times I'm sad to say that it's come push to shove with my 4 sons and grand son more than once ,but I've learned that when I teach as Christ there are consquinces for each decision made good or bad than I set the foundation of under standing and wisdom is more Easley accepted ...my son is at the stage I don't want to provoke him as much as nudge him ....just like God does us .... my sister found a book called God the rod and youre childs bod ,she said it was a good one to read. Rev

 

[lawrenceb]

True wisdom will come from a word study of "rod." Look up every mention of the word "rod" in the KJV (less than 90).

A rod is the vehicle by which you exercise your authority.

 

[spirit1st]

Listen , I know GOD deals with each of us differently ! i also know kids are different ! some need a spanking when others just need talked to ! Also other ways to deal with them , depending on the child ?

We need to be careful we do not get mad and lose control ! WWe can hurt our kids very bad ! us being big and so much stronger ! There little bodies not yet mature !

 

[Rev T.S.Perkins]

When I was about 9 I got caught in a lie and my mom said shed never see me lie again .! So she took a gold curtin rod about 7/16 In dia. And folded it over and made black blue ,and purple from my waist to my knees ...! I didn't sit for a week .but on the up side I became an honest man for it.. 2 yrs later I watched her go through a nervous breakdown where she cried for 6 hrs and slept the rest ...but I was at her side because I loved her still .So I've tried to use Gods word as my Rod of correction ..so far so good ...lol ..Rev

 

[mackem lady]

Do you have to hit children to disipline them.

Can you just use other ways like talking

I was hit. A lot as a child and those memories stick.

Does the Bible really mean use a rod

 

[lawrenceb]

We don't "hit" or "smack" our children. There are a couple of resources that we have found to be the very best on the topic. Please read this most edifying article:

Part 1 - In Defense of Biblical Chastisement, Part 1 - No Greater Joy Ministries

Part 2 - In Defense of Biblical Chastisement, Part 2 - No Greater Joy Ministries

Alternatively, some people are not in a position where they can adminsister the rod. For those, please read this article:

Rodless Training - No Greater Joy Ministries

 

[B-A-C]

Do you have to hit children to disipline them.

I don't think it's required. Certainly not for every child, and certainly not in every situation.
I was spanked more than once. Not just by my dad but even coaches in school. I know there is no way this can happen now, but I feel I'm a better person for it.
I loved and respected my dad until the day he died. I still do. He was stern, but he was fair.

Some children listen with a good talking to and reprimand. Other's don't.
In these cases I feel the punishment needs to be more that just a talking to. There needs to be some penalty, some punishment.
Maybe it's their cellphone, maybe it's video games, maybe it's confinement to their room, maybe it's taking away the car keys.
I know many won't agree with this, but in my experience, the men I know who turned out respectable and honest were men who were disciplined as children.
There is a difference between between disciplined and being beaten and abused. I believe discipline can be done in love.

 

[jeffsi435]

I work as a licensing coordinator for foster homes. Our foster parents cannot spank or hit a child or they will lose their license. Corporal punishment simply isn't allowed. They can spank their own children if they feel they need to. I think it is something that could be done in some situations, but in some families it is used far too much.
Teaching is also an intervention to teach a child a different way of dealing with a situation.

 

[lawrenceb]

My wife and I have, in part, a deliverance ministry (drunkenness ("alcoholism") and pharmakeia (drugs)).

Again, the issue is not solely about "hitting" per se, although it may seem as such when we act in the absence of God's direction. We're talking about how to train up a child to be Godly seed, in the manner that God has set out for us. Our "opinions" don't count for much.

The dilemma is as follows. We have voluntarily signed on for varying degrees of control with the God-less state. The most subtle beast of the field uses deception to get us to buy into his "benefits" packages which, of course, always involve an attached duty/obligation which is usually not discussed or revealed in full to the unsuspecting majority.

For example, in the previous post, jeffsi435 says he works as a licensing coordinator. I believe that the scriptures speak clearly in telling us that licenses are against God's will for his people. It boils down to a question of authority. Who do you look to for the authority to do the things you do? Because what you look to, is what you will render to. There is a form of obedience which leads to death: Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness? (Romans 6:16 KJV). And, There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. (Proverbs 14:12; 16:25).

If Satan puts a gun to your head and demands, "Worship me, or I'll blow your brains out!", he gains nothing but a corpse if you refuse. Any court in the land will tell you that a confession or a contract entered into under threat or coercion or duress is NULL and VOID. The real spiritual transference of power takes place when one WILLINGLY VOLUNTARILY agrees to align one's self with that authority. Obviously, no one would sign on for a program of Satan's if they knew what the bitter end of that would be (i.e. hell). So DECEPTION must necessarily be employed...

The first point here then is that we are looking at the wrong scenario, we are asking the wrong questions, about child training. And as I mentioned earlier, we don't "punish" our children; that is reserved for God. Check your Bible for verification. If we haven't done a word study in The Holy Bible for the word "rod," then we forfeit anything else we may want to say or post in forums such as this. Do not be deceived; God is not mocked. If we put forth a lackluster effort, we will reap what we have sown. We should not come here first and foremost, seeking the politically correct opinion or majority opinion on the issue. Don't come here looking for answers; look to the Word of God!

Having said that, I understand many will not agree or even understand, at this time, why, for example, licenes are against God's will. I am not here to pick on anyone. I am here to expose some of the works of Satan so that God's people can walk free. He came to set the captives free! Rarely is there ever only one single thing which brings God's people into bondage; it is a culmination of several compromises that brings us to a point of frustration, with none of us walking in our calling, none of us even desiring to seek out what our own calling is, because we're on the worldly treadmill and too concerned with mammon, too concerned with the things of this world.

 

[mackem lady]

I think children who are smacked are more likely to smak.

In Uk you can get charged for even smacking a child and the articles that larewnceb poisted would be frowned upin by the authorities.

 

[lawrenceb]

Of course you can be "charged" by Caesar's (i.e. man's God-less government) "authorities." Why? Because you have voluntarily chosen to submit to that purported authority.

BTW, "smacking" is Caesar's legal word. It is in no way descriptive of the Biblical description of the administration of the rod.

No man can serve two masters. Which master do you serve?

Let the "authorities" "frown" all they wish; as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

 

[mackem lady]

The thought of going out and buying something like a rubber rod to discipline with doesn't sit tight with me.

I don't like the thought of hitting children

 

[Christ4Ever]

I voted yes. Yet disciplined according to their age and ability to understand. This is the general method we used to discipline the children. God's treasure to my wife & me! Thank-you God for these blessings you have shared with us! Alleluia, Alleluia, Alleluia!

Diaper stage: Where children are still learning words and really don't understand concepts.
I disciplined my children by tanning their hides while they were in diapers. The sound of a swap on a pamper is worse than the actual discomfort of feeling the pain on their bottom. Meaning using a technique where contact was enough that they knew I had done it, and that the actual pain was from the ringing in their ears from the loud sound!!!! How those tears broke my heart!!!

Items/things stage: Began to value certain things more than others.
Once they were out of the pamper stage and moved into the stage where certain items or activities started to have value to them. This allowed us to "take away" or "not allowed to do". The initial punishment used in the diaper stage was remembered by them, so when take away or not allowed was used, they realized that it could come to that type of punishment. I thank God that it never had to come to that. The planting of the seed had been sufficient!

Special note: When I would yell at the top of my lungs that I was going to do dire things to them and the look on my face confirmed this, as they ran to their rooms, I would look back at my wife and give her a smile, to reassure her that "no I was not going to kill the children", but I didn't want the little darlings to be 100 percent sure that their crazy old dad might not. Military taught me a great command voice!

Conversational Stage: Talking continuously for as long as needed.
Once they were able to comprehend why something was right verses wrong, is the time I would use words to punish them with. Nothing like putting a teenager on a stool (with no back on it and away from things they could lean on) while you're working in a certain area and telling them why it was wrong doing what they had done. After a short period of time when they were no longer listening and their eyes were close to rolling in the back of their heads, and could barely stop themselves from falling off the stool, I would ask them abruptly if they understood what I had been saying. Which would jar them awake, and illicit a response of yes dad. Which of cause I would reply to them with "Which reminds me.............." and I would prattle on for a little bit longer until I could hear a moan from them. It was at this time knowing I had made the point that yes dad can talk, talk, talk, talk, talk....which was the time I would ask them a question "We're not going to have to have this talk again are we?" Any guess what their answer was?

Additional note: Each level of discipline required the support of both parents, if both are available. This is necessary since children are very good at playing one parent against the other. Which means you must communicate with each other!!!! As adults now the children have learned who to talk to with on certain subjects, but because we continue to as parents to talk with each other, our responses normally do agree with what the other will say.

Now, they understand that scripture is the foundation that I will use to deal with them as adults. I will be honest and tell you that my walk when they were growing up was not where it is now. Things might have been done differently, if I had been. However, how that might have turned out I do not have an answer for.

One of these days I'll tell the story about how my daughter came home from school and told me I couldn't discipline her or her brother (5 yrs younger) because they said we couldn't and she had a telephone number to call if we did!!!!
C4E

 

[Fragrant Grace]

Conversational Stage: Talking continuously for as long as needed.
Once they were able to comprehend why something was right verses wrong, is the time I would use words to punish them with. Nothing like putting a teenager on a stool (with no back on it and away from things they could lean on) while you're working in a certain area and telling them why it was wrong doing what they had done. After a short period of time when they were no longer listening and their eyes were close to rolling in the back of their heads, and could barely stop themselves from falling off the stool, I would ask them abruptly if they understood what I had been saying. Which would jar them awake, and illicit a response of yes dad. Which of cause I would reply to them with "Which reminds me.............." and I would prattle on for a little bit longer until I could hear a moan from them. It was at this time knowing I had made the point that yes dad can talk, talk, talk, talk, talk....which was the time I would ask them a question "We're not going to have to have this talk again are we?" Any guess what their answer was?

C4E

That sounds a good method for my older children.....my husband can certainly talk talk talk and then talk a bit more.
We'll just have to invest in some backless stools!!

 

[Eddy Fire]

Check the KJV. It is God who "punishes," while we chasten and train.

Most folks have much misunderstanding about how to raise up Godly seed.

yes - @lawrenceb
-------------

one way for 'men' to look at it is:

would you like some big as in BIG strong as in powerfully strong man to grab you and belt you next time you do anything that might slightly resemble the sort of things innocent children can do as they grow and discover boundaries and learn to perceive the difference between good and bad?

Surely as 'men' we would know better than children and therefore the belting should be accordingly meted out if we are wiling to accept that children should be physically dealt painful reminders that life hurts - even if you might have been fed too much sugar that day and were not in your right mind?

The letter kills, men and women - and children
The Spirit gives life.

do unto others as you would have them do unto you

all too often children only copy and follow those who lead the way.

 

[farout]

To spank a child a lot depends on their level of maturity and age. Each parent has to know their child and know what gets their attention to change directions.

 

[blackbear4110]

I agree with B-A-C and Christ4Ever.
I was disciplined and corrected in love.
My parents used all of (and a few more) the things Christ4Ever mentioned.

While young, I thought I hated my parents for "beating" me with spankings. I hated that I was sent to my room or banned from going outside for the day, or not allowed to play the computer. Yet it DID result in me counting the cost the NEXT time I was faced with option of doing something I didn't want to do. Did I REALLY want to get my fanny paddled? No! Did I REALLY want to be stuck in my room for an hour? No!
I can look back now and see that my parents corrected and disciplined me out of love, and instilled in me a mindset of counting the cost.

However, something that needs to be brought to light is this: some children/teens/even adults will simply rebel against correction. It not only doesn't help, but makes the situation worse.
Something I've heard my dad say more than once is that "When you go to spank a child, spank them till they cry." It's not a matter of pleasure to inflict pain. It's a matter of breaking the rebellion inside the child, for rebellion is sin.
While, yes, many people in today's day-and-age abuse their kids, paddling/spanking for correction is different because it is used out of love for the purpose of training up a child in the way he should go. If another method/means can be used successfully, then by all means do so! But rather than debating over the methods used, I think our attention should be on the intention and outcomes.
Parents/teachers/adults/whoever-is-in-charge should not discipline/punish for the sake of gaining pleasure out of the pain and hurt inflicted. That is wrong. The right intention is to raise the child into a respectable, mature adult.
As for outcomes: if a parent spanks, grounds, or lectures a rebellious child without breaking the rebellion, the rebellion only increases. That is very dangerous, and will usually result in the "no-no"/wrong-doing/crime/whatever to happen again just for the sake of making a point.

Something else to bring out: if parents will being to discipline and correct children at early ages, then it will be MUCH easier to continue training them when they are older. It's nearly impossible to begin disciplining a teenager who has been left to go during the younger, more moldable years.

And I absolutely agree with what was said, that parents should work together as one when training their children.

And, btw, my dad uses the "lecture" method quite often. My brother and I have found it to be a VERY convincing reason why we should or should not do something again.