Sexual self-control

[B-A-C]

I always dread posting a thread like this in a mixed gender thread. I thought about putting this in the men only forum, but then I thought, this is something that affects everyone, not just men. So here we go.

1 Cor 7:2; But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband.
1 Cor 7:3; The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

1 Cor 7:5; Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

1 Cor 7:8; But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I.
1 Cor 7:9; But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

"Because of immoralities" - what kind of immoralities? Stealing? Lying? No... it seems the immoralities here are sexual immoralities. A spouse is supposed to "fulfill their duties" to their husband/wife.
What does this mean... "fulfill your duty"? Take out the trash? Wash the dishes? No, again we are talking about sex here. Paul says.. "stop depriving one another"... so that Satan will not tempt you...
tempt you in what way? Tempt you to lie? Tempt you to steal? He does that sometimes, but this passage is about sexual sin. How are we tempted sexually? At least three ways are mentioned in the Bible.
... "because of your lack of self control". Have their been times in your life you have lacked "self control"?
Paul says if you don't have self control... it's better to marry.

1 Cor 6:18; Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body.
1 Cor 6:19; Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?

It seems sexual immorality is worse than some other sins. Some sins are outside your body...
but the immoral man... "sins against his own body". Have you sinned against your own body?
Lying, stealing, coveting are bad things.... but they aren't sins against your own body.

Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit... your body doesn't belong to you anymore.
If you would rather do what you want to do to your body than be led by the Holy Spirit,
then are you really being led by the Spirit?

Numb 32:23; But if you will not do so, behold, you have sinned against the Lord, and be sure your sin will find you out.

Even the sins we do in private have consequences. We can't hide them from God.

Gal 6:8; For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.

Are you pleasing your own flesh? Is personal sexual gratification what you are sowing to? Beware of
what you will reap from this.

Matt 5:27; “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’;
Matt 5:28; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Matt 5:29; If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
Matt 5:30; If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.

What do people think about when they are having sexual fantasies? Is it your spouse? Is it someone else?
What if you aren't married? Then who are you lusting for? A movie star, an actor/actress or some celebrity?
Your neighbors wife?

Deut 5:21; ‘You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, ...

Where are you getting these fantasies from? What are looking at? What are you watching on television?
What are you looking at on the internet? What kind of romantic novels are you reading?

If your eye makes you stumble, it's better to tear it out... "for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

What are you using your hands for? The Lords work, or your own gratification?

If your hand makes you stumble, cut it off.. "for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

I don't know if this literally means disfigure yourself, but it does show how much God detests certain sins.

 

[B-A-C]

One of the sexual sins is adultery.

Prov 5:3; For the lips of an adulteress drip honey And smoother than oil is her speech;
Prov 5:4; But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, Sharp as a two-edged sword.
Prov 5:5; Her feet go down to death, Her steps take hold of Sheol.
Prov 5:6; She does not ponder the path of life; Her ways are unstable, she does not know it.
Prov 5:7; Now then, my sons, listen to me And do not depart from the words of my mouth.
Prov 5:8; Keep your way far from her And do not go near the door of her house,
Prov 5:9; Or you will give your vigor to others And your years to the cruel one;
Prov 5:10; And strangers will be filled with your strength
And your hard-earned goods will go to the house of an alien;
Prov 5:11; And you groan at your final end, When your flesh and your body are consumed;
Prov 5:12; And you say, “How I have hated instruction! And my heart spurned reproof!

Prov 5:15; Drink water from your own cistern And fresh water from your own well.
Prov 5:16; Should your springs be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets?
Prov 5:17; Let them be yours alone And not for strangers with you.
Prov 5:18; Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice in the wife of your youth.
Prov 5:19; As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
Be exhilarated always with her love.
Prov 5:20; For why should you, my son, be exhilarated with an adulteress
And embrace the bosom of a foreigner?
Prov 5:21; For the ways of a man are before the eyes of the Lord,
And He watches all his paths.

Are you drinking water from your own well? Or are you looking at someone else's well that doesn't belong to you?

Exod 20:14; “You shall not commit adultery.

1 Cor 6:9; Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals,

 

[Lanolin]

I find it interesting that, some people interpret Genesis verse..'be fruitful and multiply' is to have sex and lots of children. But if you read the Bible, its not saying that! God was telling Adam and Eve to look after the earth, the plants and animals. Being fruitful meaning growing fruit and multiplying the plants to fill the earth. And also the animals. He wasnt saying to adam and eve to behave like animals themselves.

Eve was made from adams rib to help him. If adam and eve did not eat the forbidden fruit, God could have made more helpers from adams rib. But they chose the hard way, lost control..and had children that ended up killing each other...oy.

 

[Lanolin]

Imagine if adam and eve did not have any children..they would have had the entire planet to themselves and living in paradise, as equals, together always..and they would have stayed young and innocent and never aged.

 

[B-A-C]

Just a few more thoughts about self-control. Self control is a fruit of the Spirit.

Gal 5:23; gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
Gal 5:24; Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

2 Tim 3:1; But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 Tim 3:2; For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
2 Tim 3:3; unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
2 Tim 3:4; treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

I remember teachers in school telling the class "control yourselves". The phrase "self" control implies we have to do this
ourselves. God doesn't "take control" of our actions and control us. Self.. control is called for in these verses.

You want to to be an overseer or elder in the church? You want to be responsible for others in the body? This is one
of the requirements.

Tit 1:7; For the overseer must be above reproach as God’s steward, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not addicted to wine, not pugnacious, not fond of sordid gain,
Tit 1:8; but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, just, devout, self-controlled,

2 Pet 1:5; Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge,
2 Pet 1:6; and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness,
2 Pet 1:7; and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love.
2 Pet 1:8; For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
2 Pet 1:9; For he who lacks these qualities is blind or short-sighted, having forgotten his purification from his former sins.

 

[Lanolin]

Yes well its dangerous to have teachers in school who are looking with lust at children..or young adults past puberty. That is a serious sin that God will not tolerate.

I have started a new job and several workmates do not seem to have self control, they arent christians, but i think just pray for them, one of them seems to know its a problem but doesnt realise he can do aomething About it. If I am going to be on a run alone with him am going to have to have a tactful word with him, Lord help me.

 

[Lanolin]

The other one said he was gay, which me being female means hes not hassling me, but he cant seem to shut his mouth about anything.
Its kind of weird being around people who just want to talk dirty or be profane all the time. I dont have to listen or join in, but yea, I dont want to encourage it, and not particularly looking forward to any staff functions if they get on the drink!