Hi, so I will not be giving you any scriptures, I am not as well versed with the bible, but I do know what it is like to have issues as a christian. I have a very traumatic past that includes rape, domestic violence, and prostitution. Which has left me with some "issues". Thankfully I don't struggle as much as I used to....but I still struggle. I think that's the beauty of it though. God still loves me, even when I mess up. He knows my heart, and he knows that I really do want to seek him and pursue the purpose he has on my life. For me its believing that he has someone special for me, and that he is going to allow us to meet when we are both ready. I so much want to believe that, but my past creeps back in, and I give in to the fears...and I go on a date with a guy that inst a christian...and it doesn't end how I would like it to. Which I hadn't done that in two years, but I did it this past week. I was upset, I wanted to beat myself up emotionally. I wanted my friends to judge me, and tell me how horrible I was. I wanted someone to condemn me. You know what happened? No one did. My friends were sad that I stumbled, but they still loved me. They still accepted me, they didn't judge me. And they told me to brush myself off, and move on. I knew God still loved me. And in the past I would hide from God. This time I went full force to God. And I had a candid conversation with him. I went to church, and my pastor preached about the resurrection, and about Lazarus. Basically Jesus brought him back from the dead, but Lazarus had to takes steps toward Jesus. He had to make that commitment. And then Jesus told the people around to take off the bandages that had him bound up. Those people were "community", and they helped him get free. There was other stuff about the message but I think that is the main point. Seek God on a daily basis, really have a relationship with him, like he is your best friend. And get into a group where you have trust, accountability, and you can be vunerable and share your issues.
Many christians have issues. From alcohol to drugs to sleeping around to porn. Whatever issue it is, you have to be willing to give it to God. To be humble and do the things you need to do to get freed up. For you it may be sucking up your pride and going down to the altar. (For me that has never been a problem.). I have no issues with getting real at the altar, which usually means me crying. lol. My issues are waiting on God. Seeking him in reading the word. (My ex husband was a preacher and very abusively used the word agianst me). He also made me think God was an angry God who would punish me and our child if my husband sinned. Which is not true. When we sin, God doesn't condemn us, he convicts us. It is satan that condemns us. The consquences of sin unfornately have different consquences. For instance the consquences for alcholism can range from health issues, shame issues, and reckless behavior like DUI, having sex, etc. Whereas sexual sin can range anywhere from catching an Std, getting pregnant, to getting arrested (not to mention any psychological/emotional affects and soul ties). And these consquences I don't think are from God. I think they are earthly consquences. And sometimes God has to let you go through them, so that you will want to do what is right. So you will draw near to him. He loves you and wants the best for you.
Anyways hope that helps. I recommend you googling pastors that have recovered from alcohol addiction. Sometimes hearing someone elses testimony can really change your outlook on things. Joyce Meyer and Christine Caine are two women that have done that for me.
