I just need prayer. I've just been feeling more and more lately like there's just no hope. Seems like prayer has become just begging for an answer that doesn't seem to come. I've just gotten tired of hoping and being let down again and again. I watch those around me be blessed, but there doesn't seem to be enough left to hand to me. And so, I just become more sad and depressed and hopeless feeling. There was a time when I had the energy to hope, to read my Bible more, to pray constantly...and yet, even then it just seemed like I was forgotten...and so here I am just despondent...numb. I know the problem is with me and that God is true and in control and is listening...but I just would give anything right now to be reminded of that in a way that isn't just words on a page. I feel abandoned in my daily life...when I pray and pray and pray only to have anything that can't go wrong, go wrong...and worse. Between health, finances, job issues, family issues. I don't know how to pray anymore because I feel like it's fallen on deaf ears. The funny part is my prayers for others get answered. I dunno what it is. Maybe I'm being punished for something. Born with a birth defect, maybe I deserved it somehow. I dunno anymore. I just could use some encouragement and prayer from others.