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Taking my eyes off God, I saw my circumstances.
In my dismay, I exaggerated the truth of the vision God had given to me.
I began to believe that I did not have a fighting chance.
In hast, I ran a worthless race, to burden my spirit with the fatal epidemic at hand.

Out of respect for God, I questioned God’s glory.
“How long will you allow man’s confidence to outweigh your marvelous light?”
God spoke of his vengeance, but I would not hear.
God sent his Holy Spirit to comfort me, but still in him; I would not rest.
God made his face to shine upon me and still I would not give it all to him.
God removed my oppression, but I could not handle not being in charge so I took it back.

Under the shadow of the Almighty, I watched and prayed for a response.
“Trust in me with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek my will in all you do, and I will direct your paths.” God answered.
The answer God gave to me did not sit well with me. His directions I would not take.
God commanded that I give the situation back to him and assured me that the judgment of God would happen. “Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell me what you need, and thank me for all that I have done. If you do this, you will experience my peace, which is far more wonderful than the human eye can understand. My peace will guard your heart and mind as you live in Christ Jesus.”

“Remember that I hate sin, much more than you. For a long time, I have watched as my people are robbing themselves by force and made captives to sin. Now the table will turn, my wrath is on its way, and how terrible for those who are caught in sin on that day. Only a foolish man believes he can save himself from me. They speak but no truth shall come out to set them free. I am the Alpha and the Omega – the beginning and the end,” says the Lord God. “I am the one who is, who always was, and who is still to come, the Almighty One.” “The whole earth sits quietly awaiting my response.”

I lay before the Lord that night with praise on my lips and a heart filled with prayer.
Honored by God’s power and yet amazed by God’s grace, I sought the Lord God with all my heart and prayed a repenters’ prayer for my soul. Lord forgive me for not recognizing sooner the awesome power within. For not having, faith that in your own times you would save again. I remember the brokenness of self it took for me to come to you. So now I will sit back and watch you Lord do that thing that you do. I will rejoice in this time of trouble as you have commanded me to do, I will depend not on my own understanding to get me through. Lord God Almighty, I will depend on you. Even though people are pleased with their sins and not ready to give in. Their life in turmoil and death is for certain. Their lives are unmanageable and they fail to recognize, the wolves in sheep clothing that both you and I despise. I will watch and pray, shout and rejoice proclaiming your Glory all over the earth until you come again on judgment day. I thank you once again for sending yourself down in the form of a man for my debts to pay. The Lord is my shepherd and I have everything that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name. Even when I walk through the dark valley of death, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You welcome me as a guest, anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever. Amen

Copyright Alicia Ivory 2003