20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

[skipbeat]

# At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

# Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

# Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

# Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “in”.

# Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

# In the memo field of all your checks, write “for smuggling diamonds”.

# Finish all your sentences with “in accordance with the prophecy”.

# Don t use any punctuation.

# As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

# Order a diet water with a serious face whenever you go out to eat.

# Specify that your drive-through order is “to go”.

# Sing along at the opera.

# Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

# Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

# Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood.

# Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.

# When the money comes out the ATM, scream “I won! I won!”

# When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

# Tell your children over dinner: “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go”.

(Author unknown)

 

[TouchTestimony]

# At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

# Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

# Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

# Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “in”.

# Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

# In the memo field of all your checks, write “for smuggling diamonds”.

# Finish all your sentences with “in accordance with the prophecy”.

# Don t use any punctuation.

# As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

# Order a diet water with a serious face whenever you go out to eat.

# Specify that your drive-through order is “to go”.

# Sing along at the opera.

# Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

# Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

# Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood.

# Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.

# When the money comes out the ATM, scream “I won! I won!”

# When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

# Tell your children over dinner: “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go”.

(Author unknown)

hahahaha, this list is good

 

[dannibear]

I am going to ask want fries with that at my job
These were hilarious

 

[SpiritLedEd]

LOL! Not only will these maintain YOUR insanity, it will generate insanity in others!!

SLE

 

[agua]

* Whenever you hear Jamiroquai on the radio comment loudly " I love Jerry Mcguire"

* When ordering at a Micky D's drive through ask for " a crocodile sandwich .. and make it snappy "

 

[TouchTestimony]

* Whenever you hear Jamiroquai on the radio comment loudly " I love Jerry Mcguire"

* When ordering at a Micky D's drive through ask for " a crocodile sandwich .. and make it snappy "

hahahahaha