Marriage Spirituality, Discipline Of Prayer..

[Bobinfaith]

Dear married brothers and sisters,

Many of you have the discipline to pray together. Please share your testimony and may our Father use you to be an encouragement to others. One of the strongest bonds that God can give us is marriage.

Discuss this with your spouse. What factors make it difficult for you to pray with your spouse on a regular basis? Challenges for couples who pray;

Prayer is personally disarming.
Couple prayer is relationally exposing.
Prayer exposes the level of our intimacy.
Prayer is spiritual warfare against the evil one who wants to disrupt.

How about challenges for couples who don't pray;

If one spouse wants couple prayer and the other does not, there is a conflict of expectation.

Couples who do not pray together have missed a rich resource.

Couples who do not pray together are missing an important level of intimacy.

Biblical Principles for Praying Together;

"I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the wonderful future He has promised to those He called. I want you to realize what a rich and glorious inheritance He has given His people. I pray that you will begin to understand the incredible greatness of His power for us who believe Him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated Him in the place of honor at God's right hand in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 1:18-20

"And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God." Ephesians 3:18-19

Suggestions to get started:

Say a familiar prayer together before going to bed.

Agree to pray silently together before going to bed each night.

Use a devotional guide for couples.

Go through a book together.

Listen to worship music together.

You may have some wonderful suggestions already implemented, please, share them.

Your brother in Christ Jesus!

 

[jessid9]

Bob I'm really glad that you had mentioned the things that you did. My husband and I dont pray together. As much as I would like that it seems like its not on his list of things to do. I get frustrated sometimes but I know I have to be patient with him and I have to be the example. Do I comtinue to ask him to come pray with me... or do I leave it and just continue top pray by myself?

 

[Bobinfaith]

Jessica,

Good question, sister! Its a process. I am sure you are praying for your husband and God is answering your prayer but needs to break down walls here. It could be the spouse is more comfortable praying all their inner stuff just between them and God.
Some spouses may be totally exposing themselves and feel uncomfortable. If you go to the bathroom and lock the door that is normal privacy but if you lock the door to do drugs this is being secretive (this is an extreme example but for sake of point).

God will work through these areas gently. You will feel God's leading when you can go to your spouse and say what God puts in your heart to share ask gently if ready to try to pray together. Yes, Jessica, please be patient.

Your brother in Christ Jesus!

 

[Freedomwhatelse]

I do wish that I could be writing that, I have a great praying relationship with my husband I cannot today, however I do know that with a bit more patiants (waiting on the Lord) I will have. He is starting to turn his will and his life over to the care of the Lord, little by little I see progress. And I know that when he has surrendered all WHAM!!!!!! he is gonna take off like... I don't even know how to discribe it.
My husband and I have been sorta' separated although not leagally for almost 2yrs. the Lord is, as I see it, helping us clean up our past and only rely each of us, only on Him. Then I know that we will have just an amazing marriage. I have spent much time in prayer and meditation on this matter and studying my Father's word, and so I know that this was supposed to be and that nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Sometime I will go into further detail but for now the best advice from my own experiance is to give it to Our Father and He will make anything right . Marriage is very sacred to the Lord and it is very sacred to both my husband and myself. We knew full well what we were doing when we got married and there was not a shred of doubt about what we were doing, I had prayerfully done this and I know that His presance was there to bless us on the day of our Marriage.
I can not wait until the day that we will be able to share our prayers together I just think that, no I know that that will just be the ultimate!!!
Hallelujiah!!!! The Lord is so good !!!!
Yours in Him:rose:
GOD bless,Love, Peace, and Prayers,

 

[Bobinfaith]

For years in the morning Hazel prayed by herself to her God and I would pray to my God. Problem was we were praying to the same God! So we saved on oxygen and tried to pray together and she would complain that I prayed too long. I complained that she didn't pray long enough.

So we compromised (Hazel decided and I said ok) and learned to pray using the disciplines and adjusted to the process. We still had a problem that "our" personal prayers of repentence and requests were not included (too exposing).

That is when we both had a prayer agreement and though it took years, God led us to allow some embarrassing repentence and personal requests be exposed . It broke down the walls. We believe that God's forgiveness is a strong cleansing when we are accountable to each other, and we believe we can ask Him anything, but He will answer prayers only what is best for us in our marriage.

What Hazel and I learned how powerful it can be when two come together to lay our marriage prayers to God. We still have our personal devotions with God and the couples prayer needs work. We will celebrate 20 years on June 1st.

Hazel and I are working out some tough problems in our relationship and learned that marriage is a life long reconciliation. It has become a higher priority for us in our couples prayer time and seeking a better relationship in our marriage with our Father.

Your brother in Christ Jesus.

 

[Maureen]

You are all so blessed to have each other 'together' saved by Jesus and can have a relationship with him 'together' how I (not envy, as that's sin) but when I look at my own situation, I'm saved husband, not, and how I would love to 'us' to be together in the Lord, but one day, if it's His will, my husband would take drink sometimes to the extreme and comes home and just attacks my faith, but God will prevail, He knows the situation and has it in hand, I only need to be patient, it is hard, but it's my cross to bear, we really haven't much in common now, and I know why it is written not to be unequally yoked, neither of us were saved when we got married, I took a long time to come to Jesus, but he has turned my life around, praise Him.

 

[WingedGrace]

I'm so glad I found this thread...my husband is a believer, but he's not ready to give everything to God yet. He's not comfortable with with praying together & is very private. I'm just praying and having faith that God will draw him close and he willbe forever changed. I cannot WAIT.

 

[Maureen]

I've just read a little book by Joyce Meyers (another one read) called Why god Why and it gave me a revlation indeed, that if we constanly try to do God's work it robs us of our peace and joy as it's the flesh and not of Spirit, I do believe that was my downfall, as I have been robbed of the Joy of the Lord which is unspeakalbe, so I have made a decision to leave it at Jesus's feet this time once and for ever, Amen.
I am not going to let that Joy and peace be stolen away our Lord is faithful and he will have an appointment with each and everyone lost soul which we cannot hurry by our efforts. So Be It.

 

[Bobinfaith]

Dear Adiaglow and Maureen,

Praise God for His leading you both to share. I believe we all go through the trials of marriage, there are no scores or comparisons kept. We all go through the trials! Many times God sees what husband and wife bring upon themselves, much is beyond our control. The question is, where is God in all this? Is Jesus centered?

It will take His time, many years, to seperate flesh from faith and build us up to be the marriage He wants us to live.

Prayer is still powerful, whether fasting, spending quality time, or a simple devotion. One bite at a time can be a good start. Please be encouraged and press on!

Your servant in Christ Jesus.

 

[Maureen]

Thank you Bob for your wise words, I know we were not saved when we married, so I know I have to be prepared to wait on the Lord to work in my husband's life, and take the time to grow in the Lord while I do.
He knows what's best for us. Amen

 

[Createdtoworship]

lol my boyfreind(who im gonna marry) always says to people that a couple that prays together stays together. Praying with him has brought us through alot and i thank god for him ever moment of every day.

 

[TDS52]

Bob...my husband and I have been married for 31 years. We are Christians, but have yet to have the prayer relationship/fellowship that I have desired and dreamed of before our marriage. We prayed together before marriage, but I was the one who always instigated it. I think it is the man's responsibility for leadership in the spiritual matters of the family, he will be held accountible, so he should be the one who leads in the family worship time. My boys and I would pray together, but not on a consistent basis. We all have our personal prayer time, but have longed for family worship. My boys resent their dad for not filling his place of leadership and sometimes I feel as if I have had to be, both, leader and follower. From a male perspective, how can the ladies who have this desire get results without stepping out of line?

In marriage, we are/have a "one flesh" relationship...I believe this to be in everything not just the physical union. If one part is missing, there is a weakening in the bond...not truly a "oneness". I believe GOD'S order is: HIMSELF, man, woman, children, and our fellowman...the responsibility broadens. Why do so many men overlook, avoid, or shirk their responsibility? As Christians, are we not supposed to being going in the same direction, meeting the same purpose, and as you mentioned, serving the same GOD. How do we come together as if everything is all right, when there is a lacking of bonding in what can/will hold us more firmly together?

My dad taught me a great lesson on commitment and I have learned it to be true. It isn't just a one time commitment on our wedding day, that makes a marriage, but a daily and lifelong commitment to GOD, one another, and our marriages...we make the choice. Sometimes, I have felt that if I have to be, both, leader and follower, why do I need a husband? GOD brought us together in love and the love has deepened through the years, but the one desire for the "spiritual oneness" is still lacking. We attend church together, talk of spiritual things, and share our hearts...what could be the link to a "praying/worship time" together?

 

[Createdtoworship]

Amen TDS52, theres alot of questions there i would like to hear the answers to also.
Its hard i find to get the guy to take on some of the spiritual leadership, lucky for me im just in the beg. on a relationship and so we've got PLENTY of time for both of us to grow but....how do you get them the clue up and take charge?

 

[Maureen]

TDS52 dont knock it, count your blessings, my husband is far from the Lord, and what I'd give for him to be saved, let alone pray together, so please look at what you have, not at what you don't have, he told me the other day whenever I become a Christian I won't be a born again one,
don't know what sort he's after mind you, as I told him in John's gospel Jesus tells us 'Ye must be born again'
at least he's gonna be one, someday. Hallelujah.

 

[Rocklin]

bob
thanks for all of your posts...my husband and i don t pray togeather,,as a matter of fact i don t know if he even prays at all. it saddens me deeply but all i can do is hope. i my self don t pray as much as i should but i do believe in the power of prayer. i hope that i can continue on this forum on a regular basis and hear from you and others on your prayer life and praises. thanks so much for this forum

rocklin

 

[Maureen]

I can relate Rocklin when you say you don't pray as much as you'd like, snap, sometimes I get so annoyed at myself that my prayer life isn't adequet, but I find this area difficult and even more so when at the prayer meeting in church once every week, when all around can pray so openly and long winded, I struggle to even break breath and most times don't, I feel more comfortable with silent prayer, but then I feel I'm not joining in with the rest, I need courage and no one to give it better than our Lord and King, but I think it all has to be in His time not ours.
Well just thought about this seeing you asked about 'prayer life' in your post.

 

[Dreamer]

I appreciate what you say, Bob. You know what you are talking about. My husband has been serving in Iraq, and i hope and pray that we will pray together more when he returns home for Christmas. It's been a longing of mine...and I've always felt I had to push forward the issue of prayer and devotions. I hope that now HE will be the one to push it forward! You are so right in what you say. Thanks.

 

[Maureen]

been along time since discussed this one.
I don't think taking the roll as leading the prayer in the household would be something partaining to the man always, I think it would be nice to share that roll.
Just my idea guess it won't be to everyone's taste.
Perhaps it's just cause I long for someone to share it with, I wouldn't mind being the one to instigate it.
Then if it were a case of a long time in our walk together with the Lord it would be good for the man to lead and we follow.
Will let you know how that develops once husband is saved, meanwhile I'll just keep seeking His face on my own.

 

[mc_simmons]

Dear married brothers and sisters,

Many of you have the discipline to pray together. Please share your testimony and may our Father use you to be an encouragement to others. One of the strongest bonds that God can give us is marriage.

Hello Brother Bob. First of all, I thank God I found this thread. I'm sister Cecille. I and my husband are going to be 2-year married couple this December although we're not yet living together full time since my US visa to be with him is still on process. But I urge him we should be more prayerful and rebuke the thousand of miles that separate us through prayer.

At first, I found hard to convince him that we need to continue our time in "praying together" even online. His reason is that "he is not used to it" and would prefer to pray privately... My heart was crushed;-( But, I cried unto God in prayer to soften his heart and remind him we need a prayer pact as husband and wife...

Just last week, I suggested we should make a schedule (like for example, during my waking hour which he knows, I suggested he would stop for a moment and say a silent prayer also and we should type our prayer for each each time we end our chat session. At first, he was hesitant on the first suggestion, so I made a new one: to say a little prayer for each and for our marriage every tick of the clock each hour ;-) this made him more frown coz I could clearly his expression on webcam, lol. I decided not to nag him about this for awhile...I still I trust the Lord would continually talk to him in his dreams...

But you know what? Just the other night, before we ended our chat he really did type his personal prayer. Praise God!;-)

 

[Maureen]

Be patient sister Cecille, He will come around to it.
He did make an attempt, which is progress.

Although my husband is still not saved YET, he is not as far away as he was when I wrote before in this thread, I do see the hand of Jesus upon Him, many are praying for him, so there are bound to be changes in his life.

He just won't make that final commitment just yet, but the Lord will have His way.

It must be so good to be able to share in these spiritual things as husband and wife, oh what bliss.
Pray together, study, fellowship, discuss, all the things we daily live for our Lord Jesus.

I know that day will arrive for me too, I have the patience now that I never had before, Jesus is the giver, when we ask according to His will.

Bless His Holy Name.
Amen