- Joined
- Apr 25, 2006
- Messages
- 18,101
*IRS Audit*
A nervous taxpayer was unhappily conversing with the IRS Tax auditor who had come to review his records.
At one point the auditor exclaimed, "Mr. Carr, we feel it is a great privilege to be allowed to live and work in the USA. As a citizen you have an obligation to pay taxes, and we expect you to eagerly pay them with a smile."
"That's wonderful!" returned Mr. Carr, with a giant grin on his face from ear to ear. "I thought you were going to want me to pay with cash."
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*Birthday Surprise*
A famous author was autographing copies of his new novel in a Cleveland department store. One gentleman pleased him by bringing up not only his new book for signature, but reprint editions of his two previous ones as well.
"My wife likes your stuff," he remarked apologetically, "I thought I'd give her these autographed copies for a birthday present."
"A surprise, eh?" hazarded the author.
"I'll say," agreed the customer. "She's expecting a Cadillac."
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Today's Clean Laugh
*Tired Mom*
I had put in an 18-hour day at work and was upset to find my four-year-old Zack asleep in bed with my husband when I got home. Zack squirms so much it is impossible to get a decent night's sleep when he is with us. Exhausted, I collapsed into his bed instead, where I slept better than I had in years.
The next morning, I asked my husband, "Why was Zack in bed with you?"
"Oh," he replied, shrugging, "he wet his bed, and I was too tired to change his sheets."
A nervous taxpayer was unhappily conversing with the IRS Tax auditor who had come to review his records.
At one point the auditor exclaimed, "Mr. Carr, we feel it is a great privilege to be allowed to live and work in the USA. As a citizen you have an obligation to pay taxes, and we expect you to eagerly pay them with a smile."
"That's wonderful!" returned Mr. Carr, with a giant grin on his face from ear to ear. "I thought you were going to want me to pay with cash."
------------------------------------------------------------------
*Birthday Surprise*
A famous author was autographing copies of his new novel in a Cleveland department store. One gentleman pleased him by bringing up not only his new book for signature, but reprint editions of his two previous ones as well.
"My wife likes your stuff," he remarked apologetically, "I thought I'd give her these autographed copies for a birthday present."
"A surprise, eh?" hazarded the author.
"I'll say," agreed the customer. "She's expecting a Cadillac."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Today's Clean Laugh
*Tired Mom*
I had put in an 18-hour day at work and was upset to find my four-year-old Zack asleep in bed with my husband when I got home. Zack squirms so much it is impossible to get a decent night's sleep when he is with us. Exhausted, I collapsed into his bed instead, where I slept better than I had in years.
The next morning, I asked my husband, "Why was Zack in bed with you?"
"Oh," he replied, shrugging, "he wet his bed, and I was too tired to change his sheets."
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