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Word for Today / Healthy Confrontation (2)

Staff Member
Healthy Confrontation (2)

‘A time to keep silence, and a time to speak.’ Ecclesiastes 3:7 NKJV

Confronting at a time when the person is most receptive takes wisdom. Wife, when your husband first comes home from work, give him space before you bombard him with the problems of the day. Husband, don’t wait until you arrive at the event to tell your wife you don’t like the outfit she’s wearing. Tell her when she can do something about it. And you should make every effort to confront a person when he or she is alone, just as Jesus commanded: ‘If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private.’ (Matthew 18:15 NAS) Confronting someone in the presence of others can cause them to become defensive in order to save face. Your goal is reconciliation, not embarrassment.

If you have something ‘heavy’ to tell someone, it’s not a good idea to have the confrontation at their house or yours—select a neutral location. That way it will be easier for the person being confronted to leave the scene, if he or she becomes belligerent. And there’s always the possibility that this could happen.

Sometimes you have to temporarily lose people, to win them later. ‘He who rebukes a man will find more favour afterward than he who flatters with his tongue.’ (Proverbs 28:23 NKJV) Note the word ‘afterward’. If you don’t get the immediate response you desire, you can still win—especially if you pray, relying on the Holy Spirit to work in a person’s heart. But you must be willing to take the risk and confront the situation in order to bring about the change you desire. If you don’t, things will remain the same—or get worse.

written by Bob Gass
Speaking out before the Lord gives us tthe go ahead to speak is as bad as remaining silent when He has give us the words:

"I said, I will take heed to my ways, that I sin not with my tongue: I will keep my mouth with a bridle, while the wicked is before me." Psalm 39:1

"And when he was accused of the chief priests and elders, he answered nothing.

Then said Pilate unto him, Hearest thou not how many things they witness against thee?

And he answered him to never a word; insomuch that the governor marvelled greatly. " Matt 27:12-14

The one man who was always innocent of sin spoke not a word in his own defense. Was that not in accordance God's will that Jesus remained silent? Is it never in accord with God's will for us to remain silent when we are falsely accused?

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