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Word for Today / Getting Them Through the Teenage Years

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Getting Them Through the Teenage Years

'Use wisdom and understanding to establish your home.' Proverbs 24:3 CEV

When you’re the parent of a ‘teen in transition’, it’s important to find the right blend of correction, instruction, motivation and praise. Instead of focusing on behaviour you don’t want, praise and reward behaviour you want more of. If your child feels like you’re always ‘on their back’ instead of ‘on their team’ about how they dress, their friends, their music, etc., they’ll resist you at every turn.
The Bible says about parenting:

(a) ‘Children, obey your parents.’ (Ephesians 6:1 NKJV)

(b) ‘Do not exasperate your children.’ (Ephesians 6:4 NIV)

Use the carrot and stick approach. If you’re all ‘stick’ and no ‘carrot’ you’ll provoke them into rebelling, going undercover and cutting off communication. And if you grew up in a home where you were never praised or rewarded, you’ll have to work harder to break the cycle.

Exploding at your teen just teaches them to handle their own anger explosively. Expect to be shocked and be prepared to respond constructively. If you take their mood swings and inconsistencies personally, you’ll end up reacting in ways you regret.

Do you remember your own adolescence and how you felt about your parents’ opinions, tastes and rules? Mark Twain said: ‘When I was fourteen my dad was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have him around. But when I got to be twenty–one I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years!’

If you’re raising a teen, here are two Scriptures worth remembering: ‘Love never fails.’ (1 Corinthians 13:8 NKJV) ‘Use wisdom and understanding to establish your home.’ (Proverbs 24:3 CEV)

written by Bob Gass

 

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