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Are you a good listener?
'Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak' JAMES 1:19
It's often said, 'God gave us two ears and one mouth because we need to listen twice as much as we talk.' Learning that means being 'quick to listen, slow to speak.' Good listening builds relationships. But good listeners aren't born, they're made!
So here are a few tips to help you get a bit more use out of those wobbly bits of flesh on either side of your head!
1) Keep your lips closed! Resist the temptation to jump in and finish off other people's sentences for them, rein yourself in; just listen
2) Keep your mind open! Try not to jump to conclusions about what is coming next; just try to understand their point of view, their feelings, and their needs. Good listening is hearing what someone means; which can be different from what they actually say. Not everybody handles words well, especially if they're upset or under pressure in some way. If what they say doesn't quite add up, keep listening. 'It's stupid and embarrassing to give an answer before you listen' (Proverbs 18:13 CEV). When you hear more, it may make sense
3) Don't throw hand-grenades! It's easy to try to correct somebody by tossing in phrases such as 'That's not the way it was,' or, 'What did you expect?' or, 'You're just being too sensitive.' Yes that might be true but it will probably stop the flow of real communication.
written by Bob Gass
