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What is it?

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Is it me or the weather?
Which one is the cause of this disaster?
I feel so weird or even maybe bad
I don’t know how it is caused
Wait, don’t I own me?
Who is in control, really?
I don’t know what I feel and how I feel
I don’t know what to feel or how to feel
Am I the only one feeling down?
Speak up, my heart is partly torn.
My heart weighs more than my weight
Hey, may be that’s why I can’t stand straight!
My mind, my mind has gone blank
It is totally in the dark
It is swimming in the blue
It can’t move as if stuck with glue
Its lane is devoid of clue
Nothing seems to be true
God, you want me to be honest?
Tell me, am I a hypocrite?
How I feel is what I can’t tell
But you clearly see my soul
What do you watch?
Can you tell me what I can catch?
Can you tell me how I can please you?
What I can do to be good and true
Forgive me for I am too confused
The path that is narrow sometimes looks so broad.
But I now know partly from what I should
There will come a time when I won’t be so puzzled
So I will wait for God’s grace
Give my self some space
For God is the only solution
The one with a complete clarification.