Story-Teller
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- Feb 22, 2009
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Unexpected Conversations
Would life be different if those who didn't have children were able to eavesdrop on one-way conversations between a parent and child?
I was reading a story by Philip Gulley this morning about how during a meal shared, his wife - without pausing for a heartbeat, communicated with their two year old. She asked him not to lick catsup off the nearest Wise Man’s head. Most parents, reading this wouldn’t even question such a thing, identifying without questioning reason. Just a simple, "Hon, put the Wise Man down, use the fries instead". See, we have a secret, learned the hard way that it’s reasoning through such antics which will break you. Why be long winded about such things, when the answer will be modifications of the traditional ‘because’. To demand more will only cause distress and enough mental injuries to scar for a lifetime. (parents, not kids).
***
Being the newest volunteer member of our church Altar Guild, I dragged a surely three year old in tow, bribing him with part of the day spent in the park if he behaved long enough for me to set up for Sunday’s services.
***Note to those without children yet, the % of this working in your favor are between zero and none***
As my angelic son sat quietly, I set the tray for the first service, then carried it to the front of the church. Quickly returned to the altar room, to carry the other two trays to a small kitchen off the side of the church. Immediately noticed that all the wafers earmarked as bread for communion were gone. Not just from one tray, but both.
No way could little hands digest that many that quickly. But I dumbly asked anyway. “Timmy, did you eat all the wafers?”
Big brown eyes innocently looked up to me and he shook his head no.
(Note to self: if you gotta ask, practice early the art of specific questionings)
Modifying my question, while scooting down to his level, I looked directly into his eyes. Held them there to get his attention. Asked somberly, “Timbo, do you know where the wafers are that were on the trays?”
Now he understood, and with a huge grin, pulled at the waistband of his shorts and the training pants he wore. Answered Mom with the only logic that made sense to him, “for later, at the park when I gets hungry...”
Before children, I suspected - innocently enough, that most ‘situations’ would be of normal experiences: occasional artwork scribbled on walls; of staying close at the heels of the same who were chasing the dog with fistfuls of peanut butter; of neighbors calling - their voices in a frenzy of fear because my child somehow managed to climb on their roof, scaled their chimney, and was dropping hateful Barbie appendages from his younger sister’s bedroom down the brick smokestack while my daughter stood screaming. Normal everyday stuff.
But it’s the frogs put in their rain boots to claim as a home, the snails dropped in the rice crispy cereal box (to see if they make noise then when they move), glue sticks emptied of what was once inside under their beds to capture all things evil (to help out God), which catch me unprepared and a bit...frazzled.
Yet these...‘situations‘...also fills me with hope.
God gives such a spirit of ingenuity, shows that we don’t need all the answers - just the freedom to laugh in spite of the circumstances. And pray. Big time. All the time. For as long as air is going in, and going out of this starting-to-turn-gray-haired body.
Besides, hugs seem a bit more real, less glamorous, more natural, unexpected and without judgment when I don’t pause first to check for wafers, frogs, glue sticks and the status of Wise Men left on the dining room table.
Much too soon such things are replaced with other choices. Sobering stuff. As they grow, and my job as a parent is fine-tuned to hear what it is that they are experiencing. Me, I’m fine-tuning communication periods directed to God, comfortable and confident that He will show the same Grace as He’s given in directing what’s important, what’s expected, yet keep these spontaneous and not so spontaneous Spiritual Tea Times between He and me open, chuckling on occasion.
Karen Rice
Copyright 2005
Submitted by Richard
Would life be different if those who didn't have children were able to eavesdrop on one-way conversations between a parent and child?
I was reading a story by Philip Gulley this morning about how during a meal shared, his wife - without pausing for a heartbeat, communicated with their two year old. She asked him not to lick catsup off the nearest Wise Man’s head. Most parents, reading this wouldn’t even question such a thing, identifying without questioning reason. Just a simple, "Hon, put the Wise Man down, use the fries instead". See, we have a secret, learned the hard way that it’s reasoning through such antics which will break you. Why be long winded about such things, when the answer will be modifications of the traditional ‘because’. To demand more will only cause distress and enough mental injuries to scar for a lifetime. (parents, not kids).
***
Being the newest volunteer member of our church Altar Guild, I dragged a surely three year old in tow, bribing him with part of the day spent in the park if he behaved long enough for me to set up for Sunday’s services.
***Note to those without children yet, the % of this working in your favor are between zero and none***
As my angelic son sat quietly, I set the tray for the first service, then carried it to the front of the church. Quickly returned to the altar room, to carry the other two trays to a small kitchen off the side of the church. Immediately noticed that all the wafers earmarked as bread for communion were gone. Not just from one tray, but both.
No way could little hands digest that many that quickly. But I dumbly asked anyway. “Timmy, did you eat all the wafers?”
Big brown eyes innocently looked up to me and he shook his head no.
(Note to self: if you gotta ask, practice early the art of specific questionings)
Modifying my question, while scooting down to his level, I looked directly into his eyes. Held them there to get his attention. Asked somberly, “Timbo, do you know where the wafers are that were on the trays?”
Now he understood, and with a huge grin, pulled at the waistband of his shorts and the training pants he wore. Answered Mom with the only logic that made sense to him, “for later, at the park when I gets hungry...”
Before children, I suspected - innocently enough, that most ‘situations’ would be of normal experiences: occasional artwork scribbled on walls; of staying close at the heels of the same who were chasing the dog with fistfuls of peanut butter; of neighbors calling - their voices in a frenzy of fear because my child somehow managed to climb on their roof, scaled their chimney, and was dropping hateful Barbie appendages from his younger sister’s bedroom down the brick smokestack while my daughter stood screaming. Normal everyday stuff.
But it’s the frogs put in their rain boots to claim as a home, the snails dropped in the rice crispy cereal box (to see if they make noise then when they move), glue sticks emptied of what was once inside under their beds to capture all things evil (to help out God), which catch me unprepared and a bit...frazzled.
Yet these...‘situations‘...also fills me with hope.
God gives such a spirit of ingenuity, shows that we don’t need all the answers - just the freedom to laugh in spite of the circumstances. And pray. Big time. All the time. For as long as air is going in, and going out of this starting-to-turn-gray-haired body.
Besides, hugs seem a bit more real, less glamorous, more natural, unexpected and without judgment when I don’t pause first to check for wafers, frogs, glue sticks and the status of Wise Men left on the dining room table.
Much too soon such things are replaced with other choices. Sobering stuff. As they grow, and my job as a parent is fine-tuned to hear what it is that they are experiencing. Me, I’m fine-tuning communication periods directed to God, comfortable and confident that He will show the same Grace as He’s given in directing what’s important, what’s expected, yet keep these spontaneous and not so spontaneous Spiritual Tea Times between He and me open, chuckling on occasion.
Karen Rice
Copyright 2005
Submitted by Richard
