two short ones I just wrote down,seems very negative

[sentinel7]

don't know why I wrote these but here it goes:



Long days have past,my hopeless years
with nothing to fear,nothing to lose,
lack of reasons to celebrate with,
I picked up my guts to go on the path.

Still without knowing directions to go,
wonder where to sleep and hide in dread,
all I have in hand is just a broken heart,
vanished dreams and countless lies.

Another day,another sunrise,
another choice that can never be taken,
pigeon-like blue painted all over the sky.
Another try,another takeoff,
fly to nowhere can't be seen by you;
I just want to get away.

Grant me some hope,
attached a little love,
small and softly a gentle breeze.
There's no more pain,
together goes no more scream,
but a innocent baby smiling big:
everything's gonna be ok.




\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\



Give me some crayons and watch me draw,
deep blue lines crush over the paper
It wrinkles as mountains rise and fall,
it spatters as the stars melt and drop.
Above all it sounds familiar and sad
as someone break and weep for all






* * * by Krystal 09\10\16 * * *

 

[sentinel7]

I don't know why and how I wrote these.
two days ago I just wrote another one titled "An Old Love of Mine Came to Me"after seeing a movie about an artist,the"Old Lover of mine" means Art.

I'm a Christian with knowledge of spiritual warfare and once was a full time co-worker in my church,serve the Lord in many ways,being active and have read a lot.

I've attended Christian counseling twice,each stopped after a few sessions and I felt hurt.I can't handle my relationship with our pastor any more and leave my church.

Before I became a Christian I have issues of depressions,listening to and playing dark musics and tarots,constellation etc. It's hard for me to trust people.I've declared truth of God and descarded evil for many times myself.

I used to be prayer-burdened,art-like and very gifted,other Christians see me as a "spiritual" sister.Although my times are always tough but I stick to the Bible and become familiar with verses,which don't equal my spiritual life in every way.


I don't remember what to say next.