Brothers & Sister in the Lord,
I could really use some prayer backup. My oldest teen is 15, his name is Joshua (Josh). As I have written in past threads, you know that my kids are
doing well but still require a touch from the Lord after being sexually abuse
two years ago. I really need too have the Lord give me some kind of way to
deal with some of the anger that is coming from Josh when he gets angry.
It all comes down to one thing he told me. I don't trust you because I got abused right under your nose. You could not protect me then and you can't now. Sometimes when he does not want to listen to me he can be very verbally abusive to me. I know where it's coming from. After he goes on for
awhile, I just can't hear anymore and I blow up! I say things that are far from
being Christian, and later I can't sleep because I did not handle myself better and was not strong enough to hold my tongue.
I can literally see the hurt in his eyes when he does what he does. It's almost as if he is fighting himself as the tears fill his eyes. After awhile, when he calms down, he will come to me say he is sorry, hug me. I tell him alright,
we talk and that is that. I confess however, that sometimes I don't want to forgive him for the hurtful things that he says. I do it because I know that I must, but the pain of his words has crushed my heart.
There is no more counseling needed. No more that can be done by human hands. I have been praying for the Lords intervention for a very long time.
I'm not asking for the Lord to take this away from me, but rather to strengthen me in spirit and soul that I can plow through this. On the other
side of this inconceiveable pain, my children are whole. I really need the Lord to hold me right now. Being a single parent I really feel alone right now even though I know that I am not. I guess I'm just tired. Pray for my beloved Joshua and Eric that the Lord will move swiftly in finishing the healing he started so long ago. And that he will make me a better parent and a better
example to my children whom I love with all of my heart.
Strengthen me Oh Lord. I look to the heavens from whence cometh my help.
Hear the cries of my broken heart and be swift to bring the answer that only you can bring. In Jesus Name. Amen