• Welcome to Talk Jesus

    A true bible based, Jesus centered online community. Join over 13,000 members today

    Register Log In

Need clarification on boundaries

Users who viewed this discussion (Total:0)

Member
Hi everyone, So I’ve decided that I needed some help from my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ on a subject that I’m currently learning, and struggling through.

So with a bit of back story, I met this beautiful girl in a Bible study I randomly decided to join. Immediately I started to develop feelings for her and she later started to feel the same way a year after I met her. I waited to be with her for a year of being her best friend. We just passed our first year together, and we’re crazy in love with each other. We’re one of those sappy couples that make people want to throw up. Our non Christian, and Christian friends all say that they wished they had a relationship like we have and it’s very touching to hear that. I know that our relationship is definitely a gift from God, and that leads to my next, and main point.

Without getting too much in detail, We both are fully aware that we have a crazy, and intense attraction for each other and we should get married. We both aren’t able to get married soon due to the simple fact that God hasn’t given us all the tools we’d need yet. However, we’re very touchy feely with each other.

We’ve never had sex, or anything oral Thank God, but I have seen parts of her ,except her private parts, and have touched them. I touch her butt, and I honestly don’t feel conviction about it. The thing is, I’m worried that I may have hardened my heart to this area of my life, but I’m not sure because we’ve never had intercourse. Jesus does say that if you even look at a woman with lust you sin, but just looking at her without kissing or anything doesn’t make me feel my hormones bubbling.

Is there hardening on my heart? Have we already gone too far? I am undoubtedly in love with this girl and I don’t want anything ruining the blessing we have from God.

I’d appreciate an honest response! Thank you, and God bless you all?
 
Active
Thought experiment:

It's 2029. You are married to this girl. Looking back at 2019, which of your actions and decisions are you glad of, and which do you regret?

It's 2029. You and this girl have now parted ways. Looking back at 2019, which of your actions and decisions are you glad of, and which do you regret?
 
Member
Thought experiment:

It's 2029. You are married to this girl. Looking back at 2019, which of your actions and decisions are you glad of, and which do you regret?

It's 2029. You and this girl have now parted ways. Looking back at 2019, which of your actions and decisions are you glad of, and which do you regret?
I wouldn’t go as far as to regret things. I think we might get a little too intimate, but I wouldn’t dwell on it. The Holy Spirit has definitely told me that I’m within the realm of going overboard and I’m very worried that it’s possible. Like I said, we’ve never had intercourse, or oral sex. But I think that we’re too close for comfort at times.
 
Active
Ok. Sounds like you answered your own question?

I'd also say that self-discipline and good intentions are poor opponents for hormones and the feel of warm skin, so think about an accountability partner or something similar to help you treat each other well.
 
Top