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Marriage - when does God consider a man and a woman 'Married'

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Loyal
Marriage - when does God consider a man and a woman 'Married'

It is a debatable topic, and scripture is not explicit regarding the subject. But marriage is a very important topic, it should never been gone into lightly, especially for Christians.

There are I understand, three lines of thought, each having there own positives and negatives. I include this thread for discussion I am sure we all have our own views, but please try keep to scripture as much as is possible

The 3 options considered in the subject of what is marriage in God's eyes.

1 - Marriage
- according to the 'law'
2 - Marriage - requires covenant (vows) and a ceremony
3 - Marriage - begins when a man and woman have sex.

Jesus' first miracle was at a wedding, this is very important in a number of ways but let us stay on topic, with marriage'

What was a Jewish wedding like in Galilee at the time of Jesus?

The traditional Jewish Wedding at the times of Jesus.

1 - There is the marriage covenant
- The father pays for the bride and establishes the marriage covenant.

Further reading Acts 20:28; 1 Cor 6:19-20; 1 Cor 11:25; Eph 5:25-27

2 - The Bridal Chamber is Prepared - The son returns to his father’s house and prepares the bridal chamber.

Further reading John 6:62; John 14:2; Acts 1:9-11

3 - The Bride is Fetched
- At a time determined by the father (Matt 24:36), the groom fetches the bride to bring her to his father’s house. “Although the bride was expecting her groom to come for her, she did not know the time of his coming. As a result, the groom’s arrival was preceded by a shout, which forewarned the bride to be prepared for his coming.”

Further reading John 14:3; 1 Thess 4:13-18

4 - The Bride is Cleansed
- The bride undergoes ritual cleansing prior to the wedding ceremony.

Further reading 1 Cor 3:12-15; Rev 19:7-8 +

5 - The Wedding Ceremony
- The private wedding ceremony.

Further reading Rev 19:7 +

6 - The Consummation
- In the privacy of the bridal chamber the bride and groom consummate the marriage.

Further reading Rev 19:7 +

7 - The Marriage Feast
- The celebratory marriage feast to which many are invited.

Further reading Matt 22:1-14; Matt 25:1-13; Luke 12:36

Jewish culture, is totally different to the western world.

So lets look again at the three options again.


1 - Marriage - according to the 'law'
was the covenant between the couple. In the west it is get into bed first, try before you buy, if they do get married the covenant (vows) came later.

But God requires us to be married by law. Romans 13:1-7; 1 Peter 2:17

2 - Marriage - requires covenant (vows) and a ceremony.
A man and a woman are married in God’s eyes when they have completed some kind of formal wedding ceremony. The vows are said in public, who act as a witness to them saying the vows.

Jesus was presence at a wedding ceremony at Canaan in Galilee. He accepted the wedding procedure of the day, He did not condemn it, he had plenty to say about divorce. In fact Jesus used the Jewish procedure for a wedding at the time he was on earth as a model of His Church, His beloved Bride.

3 - Marriage - begins when a man and woman have sex. God considers a man and a woman married the moment they engage in sexual intercourse. Some who take this to mean that a couple is not truly “married” in God’s eyes until they have consummated the marriage physically. Others argue that, if any man and woman have sex, God considers the two of them to be married. The basis for this view is the fact that sexual intercourse between a husband and wife is the ultimate fulfilment of the “one flesh” principle (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5; Eph 5:31). In this sense, sexual intercourse is the final “seal” on a marriage covenant.

We could refer to Isaac and Rebekah, he took her into a tent, she became his wife. But in the NT at the time of Jesus, a wedding was not like that, a wedding ceremony was as listed above. Marriage covenant first, then the Bridal chamber is prepared, the Bride is fetched, the Bride is cleansed, then comes the wedding ceremony, then the consummation, finally the marriage feast which is a very joyous occasion and could last for a full week.

But is this 'marriage' in the eyes of God? We should consider also a disabled person who cannot have sex, or a terminally ill person, they marry according to the law, say their vows in public etc, but either the man or the woman dies and they have not had sex, were they married?

Should the various options be ignored, or shall we choose a little from one and a little from another to suit our situation?

When is a man and a woman married in God's eyes?
 
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So, in reality I might assume you don't know, ":p" because your title is a question and your ending is also a question. And the "body" or content of your thread, it also seem to me is a "Syllogism". So I will say this, Let "God" answer the question: I think this verse of "Holy Scripture" is in "implicit" form. If not, the community of "Nazareth" was correct in Labeling "Mary" a "lose woman" and "Jesus" a illegitimate child ".

I think this verse, answers the question "implicit" and "explicitly" inform.

24And Joseph awoke from his sleep and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took Mary as his wife, 25but kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus.

Now if we are having trouble with the "English syntax" the placement of words in verse 25. And ladies, the men might have problems in understanding in what I am trying to say, but you know. Women are a lot smarter than men in this context. Verses 25, " but joesph did not ... her until after Jesus was born. So they were married before they "knew" one another.
You see languages, comes in all kinds of "vernacular" of a given language, To make things clearer to a certain culture. Where there "Cannot" be a mistake in what is said. Especially pertaining to the "Word of God" You see, some people are "Hard or lazy of hearing" Many Christians would be shocked, if they could read some of the "Original copied text" in that language and "the Hyperbole" God used on "Israel"! Enough said on that! And moving on and forgive me of this sidebar.


:cool: Now it cannot get plainer than that.

PS. "In my opinion" :p. Now what do others, think? For I did leave room for "a covenant ceremony"

Personally, I think, "Brother-Paul" you have a "hidden agenda" in starting this thread! "I got my eyes on you":eyes:
 
Loyal
John 4:17; The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus *said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’;
John 4:18; for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly.”

Apparently Jesus didn't consider "shacking up" the same thing as being married.
I'm not sure private/secret/clandestine marriage ceremonies count either. Then there is no neutral party with legal authority
to hold either one to accountability if either one breaks the covenant. I've heard people say well my brother Bubba was there...
that's great but if one of you breaks the covenant, which side is he going to take? I've heard others say it was between me, her
and God. That's good too, but if there is no one there with binding legal authority, then there is no accountability.
The Bible calls this fornication.
 
Loyal
So, in reality I might assume you don't know, ":p" because your title is a question and your ending is also a question.

That is called encouraging a debate brother.

I give three options for discussion, there may be more, lets talk.

And you can put your tongue back in your mouth :sob:
 
Loyal
Personally, I think, "Brother-Paul" you have a "hidden agenda" in starting this thread! "I got my eyes on you":eyes:

No hidden agenda PB, it is obviously your suspicious mind brother.

In a previous post I felt it was a little to personal one one of our dear brothers, and it would be best as an open discussion for all on the subject.

I don't need your eyes on me my friend, my eyes are not on you either, but I know someone who has his eyes on you.
 
Loyal
In the example of the Jewish wedding at the time of Jesus

The couple were considered married, when the marriage covenant was done in public, and the father of the groom paid a dowry for the bride.

1 - There is the marriage covenant
- The father pays for the bride and establishes the marriage covenant.

Further reading Acts 20:28; 1 Cor 6:19-20; 1 Cor 11:25; Eph 5:25-27

At the point of the marriage covenant they were considered married, betrothed but considered married, not when they had sex, they never had sex until at least 12 months and the groom was not allowed to go get his bride 'until the Father said it was time to go get his bride'
 
Loyal
Looking at option 3 we read - Isaac took Rebekah into the tent (they had sex) she became his wife.

3 - Marriage - begins when a man and woman have sex.

Genesis 24:67 (NKJV)
Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.
 
Loyal
I think this verse, answers the question "implicit" and "explicitly" inform.

24And Joseph awoke from his sleep and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took Mary as his wife, 25but kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus.

This verse sums up very clearly what was shared about the wedding/marriage procedure in Galilee at the time of Jesus. It was common that the groom would after the first stages go back home to his father and start to prepare a place for her, just as our Lord is doing for his bride now. The groom would not see the bride again for around 12 months, he had gone away, the bride was preparing for the groom to return for her at any time, lamp lit, trimmed and filled with oil. The groom on the other hand had gone away for the period, for a short while, preparing a place for his bride, but he couldn't go get her until... the father said the time was right.

Matthew 1:24-25 (NKJV)
Then Joseph, being aroused from sleep, did as the angel of the Lord commanded him and took to him his wife,
and did not know her till she had brought forth her firstborn Son. And he called His name JESUS.

In this example they didn't have sex to be called married.

Mary was Joseph's wife through the covenant they made together and the betrothal, period of engagement (they didn't see each again until the father said it was time to 'go get your bride')
 
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No hidden agenda PB, it is obviously your suspicious mind brother.

In a previous post I felt it was a little to personal one one of our dear brothers, and it would be best as an open discussion for all on the subject.

I don't need your eyes on me my friend, my eyes are not on you either, lbut I know someone who has his eyes on you.
I hope so. "For His eyes is on the sparrow and I know he watches over me". I use to love to sing that song, and this old world has tried their best to removed it from the "depths" of my soul. For those lyrics, all stances is so true in many of our lives in Christ!

Why should I feel discouraged,
Why should the shadows come,
Why should my heart be lonely,
And long for heaven, heaven and home,
When, when Jesus is my portion,
My constant Friend is He;
Oh, oh-oh, his eye is on the sparrow,
And I know He watched, watched it over me.
I sing because I’m happy…
I sing because !'m free!

Not, bragging, I can sing it too!
From a kid, my mother taught me how to Sing, From the heart, and I hated it! Gospels, Sacred Heart, Spiritual Songs, and Negro Spiritual. I would get mad in front of her, and sing so deep in my being, the tears would run down her face, And the Female Methodist Pastor across the street would cry, Tears running down their faces. LOL! They knew, something I didn't know. From the early age of grade school, until I graduated from high school, I song in all the schools "Choirs" and Chorus, Glee Clubs, and have conducted a few times "Church Choirs" and The Men's church choirs". Oh yes, one time by accident, our French Music teacher Heard me sing a solo part she was trying to teach a student who seem to not get the required notes, Mind you, I didn't not know she was listening, but outside of the room. Me and some of my friends where playing around. But she was listening outside of the room, This song was in "Opera style" now, the name of this song. Was; "He has the whole world in His Hands" the Solo Part. You see we song by reading music notes! That French teacher started crying, she just kept crying, and said I didn't even know you could sing like that. She wanted me take lead, mine you a was still a rebellions kid. She would list my name on programs to events as Solo, but when she motion me to come I would not come down to sing solo, And she cry and cry. But she got me in the end. The school Choir song at our Graduation, she called up the students who was sitting in the audience who belong to the choir, We went up, now this Graduation Class was way over 200 students, and I think, everyone's father, mother, uncle, Aunt, cousin, grandmother, and grandfather and their brothers and sisters was there and everyone's neighbor and their children's and there sisters and brothers was there, LOL, It look like a 1000 people was there in a big auditorium bright lights everywhere, bouncing off the audience eyeglasses, That song came up, she gave a speech, and "Called My Name Out" on the Microphone! Sweat, I kid you not! Started to pour down my head, My knees started to shake! I am not kidding, it got so, Quiet in there, you could hear a "Church mouse" TT on cotton! My heart started to pound so loud!
Boom,Boom,Boom, Boom. That part Had some "Long Notes" in it! I song it, and the word got out, they didn't know I could sing like that! My mama knew! As a kid in Elementary school we had a kid from the neighbor who grew up to be a "Opera" singer. And he would come back home, and to his elementary school and sing for us little kids, And the school would take us to hear "Opera" events. And as we played as little kids we would imitate "Opera" singers.

So I thank you Brother-Paul, for bring to my attention; your words "But I know someone who has his eyes on you"!

Cause all of those days was total "Rebellious" in this "testimony" I did not know God, I was not born again, and I made many cry and some of those tears was tears of Joy in those eyes, For "Holy Spirit" was flowing in their hearts! The "Holy Spirit" was on me but it had not entered me! For my time had not yet come! So what I'm saying, those parents don't you fret none. "All things works together for the good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose". So let those tears roll down your faces and let your heart be broken. He that have ears"Let him hear"

Thank you Brother-Paul for directing us to "His eyes is on the the Sparrow and I know He is watching over me"

Yes, thank you, Jesus!
 
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John 4:17; The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus *said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’;
John 4:18; for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly.”

Apparently Jesus didn't consider "shacking up" the same thing as being married.
I'm not sure private/secret/clandestine marriage ceremonies count either. Then there is no neutral party with legal authority
to hold either one to accountability if either one breaks the covenant. I've heard people say well my brother Bubba was there...
that's great but if one of you breaks the covenant, which side is he going to take? I've heard others say it was between me, her
and God. That's good too, but if there is no one there with binding legal authority, then there is no accountability.
The Bible calls this fornication.
You lost me again!! The woman was a adulteress, she had been sleeping around with other women's husbands! Matter of fact 5 !
It is so clear, that a child can understand! He ask her where is your husband, she replied I Have no husband! Jesus, replied you have spoken "The Truth"!!!!!!!!!!!! The women had slept with, in the past 5 different husbands, They were not hers, She do not have one. These men was married to someone else! now how could any man, a stranger know that! Come see this man he has told me everything I have done this must be the Messiah!

You have had 5 husband and the one you got now ain't yours!

Married women I believe understand this portion of the text, better than men. Because men are so dominant sometimes in "their personal theological thinking".

I guess what is confusing to me, somehow you threw the word "Shacking" in there. Now how that got anything to do with the woman at the well, I don't even know. Because Jesus was not talking about who she was living with! I think personally the Bible might have to be written in a different modern day vernacular, because it is a sure fact that most readers do not understand the vernacular of earlier biblical culture nor do they seem to care. The blame is on our leaders and not on our people..
 
Loyal
Now that was PB talking, your heart opened my friend.

Did I strike a right cord I wonder, to me that was PB not John the Baptist sounds like. ;)

Thank you for sharing a little of yourself brother.

You love the sparrow my friend, mine is the Blackbird, morning has broken, like the first morning, blackbird is singing like the first day.

Keep singing brother, He has the whole world in His hand, so we will never walk alone.

Here on earth, I cannot sing well, I cannot hear the notes, I struggle hearing words, but I sing from the heart to my Lord, one day soon brother, one day soon, I will hear and will sing Hallelujah's and more, we will all sing when we are at the wedding feast my friend.

Bless you
 
Loyal
You lost me again!! The woman was a adulteress, she had been sleeping around with other women's husbands! Matter of fact 5 !
It is so clear, that a child can understand! He ask her where is your husband, she replied I Have no husband! Jesus, replied you have spoken "The Truth"!!!!!!!!!!!! The women had slept with, in the past 5 different husbands, They were not hers, She do not have one. These men was married to someone else! now how could any man, a stranger know that! Come see this man he has told me everything I have done this must be the Messiah!

You have had 5 husband and the one you got now ain't yours!

Married women I believe understand this portion of the text, better than men. Because men are so dominant sometimes in "their personal theological thinking".

I guess what is confusing to me, somehow you threw the word "Shacking" in there. Now how that got anything to do with the woman at the well, I don't even know. Because Jesus was not talking about who she was living with! I think personally the Bible might have to be written in a different modern day vernacular, because it is a sure fact that most readers do not understand the vernacular of earlier biblical culture nor do they seem to care. The blame is on our leaders and not on our people..

I bet we all understand if we call her a slapper. But as Jesus did not use the word I guess we should not use this word.

But should she repent she could have still been saved. Go and sin no more Jesus said many times.

He also repeated many times, it was a wicked and adulterers generation. What would he say now... no doubt... everything is as bad as I told you and it will continue to get worse.
 
Loyal
You lost me again!! The woman was a adulteress, she had been sleeping around with other women's husbands! Matter of fact 5 !
I don't read it that way. I read she had been married 5 times. She is with a sixth man now... but she is not married to him. She is "shacking up" with him.

John 4
16. He *said to her, “Go, call your husband and come here.”
17. The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus *said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’;
18. for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly.”
19. The woman *said to Him, “Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet.
 
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This verse sums up very clearly what was shared about the wedding/marriage procedure in Galilee at the time of Jesus. It was common that the groom would after the first stages go back home to his father and start to prepare a place for her, just as our Lord is doing for his bride now. The groom would not see the bride again for around 12 months, he had gone away, the bride was preparing for the groom to return for her at any time, lamp lit, trimmed and filled with oil. The groom on the other hand had gone away for the period, for a short while, preparing a place for his bride, but he couldn't go get her until... the father said the time was right.

Matthew 1:24-25 (NKJV)
Then Joseph, being aroused from sleep, did as the angel of the Lord commanded him and took to him his wife,
and did not know her till she had brought forth her firstborn Son. And he called His name JESUS.

In this example they didn't have sex to be called married.

Mary was Joseph's wife through the covenant they made together and the betrothal, period of engagement (they didn't see each again until the father said it was time to 'go get your bride')
Well, I think I will take my leave on this one, I understand what the Bible says: about marriage, I understand that Joesph and Mary were married. I think that the Bible is so very clear on such things, and God Has made it clear for True Christians to understand it. Even the common people. But your explanation on marriage is very confusing and you trying to explain what God has explain clearly is alarming to me! Notice: "I said to me". Now your explanation of it maybe "Rewarding and edification" to other Christians" or just maybe I cannot get on track of your "edification to the body of Christ" in growing.

If I am ignorance concerning my stances, and if it be so great of important, I believe God will reveal even that to me.
I take my leave. My neighbors are Jewish, some of my children friends are Jewish, my community is Jewish as well , my grandfather was very close to the Jewish community, by occupation, My mother had me and my brother names place on the praying walls in Israel, But me I am not that deep into the Jewish customs and practices of ancient and Jewish culture, especially a expert on Jewish marital customs, since there are many different type of Jewish people and each have their different culture practices. Even in late Old Testament times leading into the New Testament era.

So I take my leave in such matters. For definitely I have not entered into that field of Study.
 
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I bet we all understand if we call her a slapper. But as Jesus did not use the word I guess we should not use this word.

But should she repent she could have still been saved. Go and sin no more Jesus said many times.

He also repeated many times, it was a wicked and adulterers generation. What would he say now... no doubt... everything is as bad as I told you and it will continue to get worse.
The text does not imply that she did not get saved, it implies she did by her testimony. But the text implies "explicitly" she was a lady of the street.

I'm sorry this is kindergarten grade school, debate. And it has its proper place, and must be debated and "Rightly divide" so students, do not be afraid, challenge the so call instructor of "Rigtheousness"! If you don't challenge you will not grow!
 
Loyal
Interesting comments brothers, I initially understood as PB states, but I take your point also B-A-C

This therefore takes me to a commentary for more in depth guidance, the first I always look at, after considering scripture on it's own, is the Tyndale Commentary, there are some interesting points here...

John4:15-16
15
. Responding to the promise of living water that quenches thirst for ever, The woman said to him, ‘Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.’ Her response indicates two things: first, she was now interested in Jesus’ offer; and second, she still did not understand what he meant by ‘living water’.


16-18. Jesus did not respond directly to her request. Instead, He told her, ‘Go, call your husband and come back.’ Jesus had touched upon a sore point, for the woman replied, I have no husband, to which Jesus responded, You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.

This text has been interpreted in two ways.

First, metaphorically so that the woman’s past experience with five husbands symbolizes the Samaritan nation languishing under foreign gods. Those adopting this view point to 2 Kings 17:24-33, which tells how, following the deportation of many people from the northern kingdom of Israel, the Assyrians brought in people from five other nations who worshipped their own gods to repopulate the land. It was intermarriage between these people and those of the northern kingdom who were not deported that produced the Samaritan people. The Jews regarded them as a hybrid race and one whose relationship with Yahweh had been compromised. Their unfaithfulness was regarded as religious adultery (in the OT adultery was used as a symbol of Israel’s unfaithfulness to Yahweh when she went after other gods). Interpreted along these lines, Jesus’ words to the woman allude to the Samaritans’ previous worship of the gods of the five nations. However, the evangelist did not intend Jesus’ words to be understood in this way, for, as he unfolds the story, Jesus sends the woman away to get her husband and then return—something that needs to be taken literally, not metaphorically. (It has also been noted that although people from five nations were brought in to repopulate the land, the gods they worshipped as listed in 2 Kings 17:30-31 were seven, not five.)


Second, the text has been interpreted literally, and this approach is the correct one. Nevertheless, it can still be understood in different ways. The word translated ‘husband’ (anēr) in the NIV can mean either ‘husband’ or ‘man’ (a male). If we take anēr to mean ‘husband’ she could have been married five times and each time her husband had died, or each time she had been divorced (in a society where divorce was almost entirely a male prerogative), and now she was living with a man who was not her husband (meaning someone else’s husband). If anēr is taken to mean ‘a man’, it is possible that she had never been married, but had had a series of affairs with men, culminating in a final adulterous relationship. The text does not enable us to determine which of these interpretations is correct. Either way, it seems Jesus’ intention in mentioning these things was not to create a sense of guilt, but to confront the pain in her relationships with men. This would accentuate her thirst for a meaningful relationship with God and make her receptive to the revelation he was offering her.

HUSBAND translated from:
Greek Word:
ἀνήρ
Transliteration: anēr
Phonetic Pronunciation: an'-ayr
Root: a primary word cf <G444>
Vine's Words: Fellow, husband, man, sir
English Words used in KJV:
man 156
husband 50

sir 6
fellow 1
not tr 2
[Total Count: 215]
a primary word [compare <G444> (anthropos)]; a man (properly as an individual male) :- fellow, husband, man, sir.
Strong's Talking Greek & Hebrew Dictionary.

Therefore may not be husband but another man.

The striking thing about all this is not the number of husbands or lovers this woman had lived with, nor even that the man she now had was not her husband, but that Jesus had such knowledge about her personal life. This is another illustration of what the evangelist says in 2:24-25: ‘Jesus ... knew all men. He did not need man’s testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man.’ Jesus’ supernatural knowledge, revealed in his understanding of Nathanael (1:48) and the Jews who ‘believed’ in him (2:24), is revealed again in the case of the woman of Samaria. This is what the evangelist focuses upon as he continues his narrative.

Tyndale Commentaries - John.
 
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I don't read it that way. I read she had been married 5 times. She is with a sixth man now... but she is not married to him. She is "shacking up" with him.

John 4
16. He *said to her, “Go, call your husband and come here.”
17. The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus *said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’;
18. for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly.”
19. The woman *said to Him, “Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet.
The reason you do not see it that way is because you are not familiar with the "English grammer" " "English syntax" writing forms and placement of words. You can read words good and understand a word meaning, but "English syntax" escapes you! I am not talking about "context" here but "English syntax" and how words are place in the context" if you miss the "Syntax" in this case is called a "compound complex syntax". Now if you are prayerfully engage in "Reading the "Holy Scripture" and continually relying upon the Holy Spirit guidance in which has been your practice through out the years and not the guide of a commentary. The Spirit of The Living God , will even reveal this truth too!
 
Loyal
Well, I think I will take my leave on this one, I understand what the Bible says: about marriage, I understand that Joesph and Mary were married. I think that the Bible is so very clear on such things, and God Has made it clear for True Christians to understand it. Even the common people. But your explanation on marriage is very confusing and you trying to explain what God has explain clearly is alarming to me! Notice: "I said to me". Now your explanation of it maybe "Rewarding and edification" to other Christians" or just maybe I cannot get on track of your "edification to the body of Christ" in growing.

If I am ignorance concerning my stances, and if it be so great of important, I believe God will reveal even that to me.
I take my leave. My neighbors are Jewish, some of my children friends are Jewish, my community is Jewish as well , my grandfather was very close to the Jewish community, by occupation, My mother had me and my brother names place on the praying walls in Israel, But me I am not that deep into the Jewish customs and practices of ancient and Jewish culture, especially a expert on Jewish marital customs, since there are many different type of Jewish people and each have their different culture practices. Even in late Old Testament times leading into the New Testament era.

So I take my leave in such matters. For definitely I have not entered into that field of Study.

The point to note brother is the Jewish practices in Galilee, as you say there are some variations in Jewish practice, more now than then, but this also tells me why Jesus chose the wedding feast at Canaan in Galilee, lets also not forget about 2/3 of the scriptures of Christ's ministry was around Galilee.

He chose His disciples from there, He chose their various occupation, fishermen, tax collector, etc, he spoke in language they knew, in things they knew, I will make you fishers of men, etc.

It is important, I believe, to consider the culture and location of the times of Jesus including what he said and taught.

The procedures of the wedding are replicated by our Lord for His Church, the ekklesia, His bride, right up to the Father is the one who tells the groom when to go get his bride, no one know the day or the hour except the Father in heaven.

During the marriage it was also traditional for the groom to offer wine to the bride, if she refused the wine offering the marriage would not go ahead, but she doesn't, she has been waiting patiently for the groom to come for her, then the wedding feast can begin.

Unlike the western world the Wedding Feast can last up to a week, they dance and sing. I once went with a brother to a Jewish hotel, the person/speaker that night was Helen Shapiro, with that name she had to be Jewish, she was, and she was a Messianic Jew, PTL. Helen had a hit song in the 1960's. Walking Back to Happiness, this was before she became a Messianic Jew, she gave her testimony, after that she invited those there to join then in dancing and singing as it would be at a Jewish wedding, their dancing was like folk dancing to us, but very happy, very joyful.

That was in the 1970's when the Messianic Jews was formed, it seem like yesterday, I remember it still just like yesterday.
 
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Therefore may not be husband but another man.
Perhaps... but He tells this woman... you've had 5 (fill in the blank)... the man you're with now is NOT (fill in the blank).
What made this 6th man different from the other five? If the other five were not her husbands, why didn't Jesus simply say.. you're with the 6th guy who isn't your husband.
Somehow, something was different about the other 5.
 
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Interesting comments brothers, I initially understood as PB states, but I take your point also B-A-C

This therefore takes me to a commentary for more in depth guidance, the first I always look at, after considering scripture on it's own, is the Tyndale Commentary, there are some interesting points here...

John4:15-16
15
. Responding to the promise of living water that quenches thirst for ever, The woman said to him, ‘Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.’ Her response indicates two things: first, she was now interested in Jesus’ offer; and second, she still did not understand what he meant by ‘living water’.


16-18. Jesus did not respond directly to her request. Instead, He told her, ‘Go, call your husband and come back.’ Jesus had touched upon a sore point, for the woman replied, I have no husband, to which Jesus responded, You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.

This text has been interpreted in two ways.

First, metaphorically so that the woman’s past experience with five husbands symbolizes the Samaritan nation languishing under foreign gods. Those adopting this view point to 2 Kings 17:24-33, which tells how, following the deportation of many people from the northern kingdom of Israel, the Assyrians brought in people from five other nations who worshipped their own gods to repopulate the land. It was intermarriage between these people and those of the northern kingdom who were not deported that produced the Samaritan people. The Jews regarded them as a hybrid race and one whose relationship with Yahweh had been compromised. Their unfaithfulness was regarded as religious adultery (in the OT adultery was used as a symbol of Israel’s unfaithfulness to Yahweh when she went after other gods). Interpreted along these lines, Jesus’ words to the woman allude to the Samaritans’ previous worship of the gods of the five nations. However, the evangelist did not intend Jesus’ words to be understood in this way, for, as he unfolds the story, Jesus sends the woman away to get her husband and then return—something that needs to be taken literally, not metaphorically. (It has also been noted that although people from five nations were brought in to repopulate the land, the gods they worshipped as listed in 2 Kings 17:30-31 were seven, not five.)


Second, the text has been interpreted literally, and this approach is the correct one. Nevertheless, it can still be understood in different ways. The word translated ‘husband’ (anēr) in the NIV can mean either ‘husband’ or ‘man’ (a male). If we take anēr to mean ‘husband’ she could have been married five times and each time her husband had died, or each time she had been divorced (in a society where divorce was almost entirely a male prerogative), and now she was living with a man who was not her husband (meaning someone else’s husband). If anēr is taken to mean ‘a man’, it is possible that she had never been married, but had had a series of affairs with men, culminating in a final adulterous relationship. The text does not enable us to determine which of these interpretations is correct. Either way, it seems Jesus’ intention in mentioning these things was not to create a sense of guilt, but to confront the pain in her relationships with men. This would accentuate her thirst for a meaningful relationship with God and make her receptive to the revelation he was offering her.

HUSBAND translated from:
Greek Word:
ἀνήρ
Transliteration: anēr
Phonetic Pronunciation: an'-ayr
Root: a primary word cf <G444>
Vine's Words: Fellow, husband, man, sir
English Words used in KJV:
man 156
husband 50

sir 6
fellow 1
not tr 2
[Total Count: 215]
a primary word [compare <G444> (anthropos)]; a man (properly as an individual male) :- fellow, husband, man, sir.
Strong's Talking Greek & Hebrew Dictionary.

Therefore may not be husband but another man.

The striking thing about all this is not the number of husbands or lovers this woman had lived with, nor even that the man she now had was not her husband, but that Jesus had such knowledge about her personal life. This is another illustration of what the evangelist says in 2:24-25: ‘Jesus ... knew all men. He did not need man’s testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man.’ Jesus’ supernatural knowledge, revealed in his understanding of Nathanael (1:48) and the Jews who ‘believed’ in him (2:24), is revealed again in the case of the woman of Samaria. This is what the evangelist focuses upon as he continues his narrative.

Tyndale Commentaries - John.
So in essence the common people of the NT era, and now, might as well throw their Bibles in the trash cans, for it has become secondary for instructions of righteousness and is unreliable because God's Word is not plain enough, and they should go buy "commentaries" and let the Commentarian explain to them what God wants. And God's intentions. Because The Word of God is not able to speak to His people,plain enough that they may understand. In this New Testament era! Even with the help of the Holy Ghost or His Son, Jesus Christ! Now I say: I believe the "Holy Scripture" speaks plainly to the child of God , and that child only needs a "pointer " . And not a nterpreter. And that pointer always point them to the book, and tells them to read it, in its entirety over and over again, and pray over and over and give you understanding of God and not biblical knowledge! You study to know who God is! And Jesus is the one who decides what you shall received in Knowing and growing in, who God is, and throughout eternity we will be learning who God is! We shall forever be learning who God is! If you could just understood what I have just said! And you cannot understand that with a human mind! For those words are "Spiritual" full of life" For even the hidden language from this world ! For if you are God's children you hear me! And understand the words that I speak!
 

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