In need of some prayer or advice plz

[Cherubpuff]

its been a little over a year since i repented of what I thought were the things keeping me from God..Needless to say, one of them was smoking pot.

I always had my smoking habits under control and never let it run my life or alter the way i think or behave. I'll even go as far to say that I was under heavy conviction of things in my life that I always seemed to minimize when i was sober. now, I'm in no way trying to justify smoking it or make light of using it but the past 2 weeks have been very hard for me.

I no longer associate with my friends or have even talked to them since I made the decision to repent, that and the fact I really have no no one or ever had anyone in my life I felt or was given any type of affection from, makes things even worse.

I'm seriously considering smoking again..this loneliness is killing me and smoking always for the most part helped me deal with it. And yes i enjoyed smoking recreational so im not trying to make excuses as to why I want to start back up. I did like it and i would like to do it again.

I have been praying all week for conviction or some type of word from Jesus but i have received nothing... I'm starting to believe that it can be different for different people. i.e being able to control it and not letting it control you.

I also have to question if I'm being tested. i don't believe that I am as I was and still am being tested in regards to something else I had repented. it simply feels like a desire or habit i want to pick back up.

Im not even sure what to ask for..I guess Im worried that it could be a sin (hence, the reason i decided to give it up).

i want to make sure but as most of us know here at the forums there is much debate as to the usage of controlled substances.

Any prayer or words of wisdom would be appreciated.

 

[DeiSponsa]

its been a little over a year since i repented of what I thought were the things keeping me from God..Needless to say, one of them was smoking pot.

I always had my smoking habits under control and never let it run my life or alter the way i think or behave. I'll even go as far to say that I was under heavy conviction of things in my life that I always seemed to minimize when i was sober. now, I'm in no way trying to justify smoking it or make light of using it but the past 2 weeks have been very hard for me.

I no longer associate with my friends or have even talked to them since I made the decision to repent, that and the fact I really have no no one or ever had anyone in my life I felt or was given any type of affection from, makes things even worse.

I'm seriously considering smoking again..this loneliness is killing me and smoking always for the most part helped me deal with it. And yes i enjoyed smoking recreational so im not trying to make excuses as to why I want to start back up. I did like it and i would like to do it again.

I have been praying all week for conviction or some type of word from Jesus but i have received nothing... I'm starting to believe that it can be different for different people. i.e being able to control it and not letting it control you.

I also have to question if I'm being tested. i don't believe that I am as I was and still am being tested in regards to something else I had repented. it simply feels like a desire or habit i want to pick back up.

Im not even sure what to ask for..I guess Im worried that it could be a sin (hence, the reason i decided to give it up).

i want to make sure but as most of us know here at the forums there is much debate as to the usage of controlled substances.

Any prayer or words of wisdom would be appreciated.

This is just me tossing thoughts around, but I think loneliness is a tool God uses to teach us how to be more reliant on Him, as well as on ourselves, versus substances/other people/things. I know it can be incredibly hard, but know that you aren't alone. As a sort of loner, I'm well acquainted with the lonelies. Allow yourself to feel it but know that it is only temporary. You will get through it

You'll be in my prayers and keep us posted!

 

[rlowe]

Praying for you & God's strength for you to keep from sliding back into this habit.

A habit is a cable we weave,
one thread each day, until
at last we cannot break it.