First and foremost, I suck at writing...so this might be awkward to read, sorry. Hi, my name is conor, I'm terrified of what my future holds for me. I'm 19, I live at home with my single mom and little sister. I have no job, car, drivers license, and I'm not in school. I'm in an interracial relationship with the girl of my dreams. (I have had sex before marriage, I'm not that strong a man.) Anyway, I don't know what my future holds for me an it truly scares me. I want to provide for a wife and children, I want a job where I'm happy, I want my name to be known, i want to love myself and my life again; I haven't for quite some time. I don't want to fade away into obscurity, I don't want to be another grunt at a 9 to 5 office job where I sit in a cubicle and type away at some screen while I think about how much I hate my life. I know the time to act like a child is gone, but im scared that if I let it go I'll never be the same. I'm not the most religious person out there, so I don't really see God involving himself in my life too much. The world is an ugly place, and I'm scared it will tear me apart. I haven't told anyone else this concern, I don't want to appear weak. My mom is kicking me out at the end of the year and I'm not ready to be on my own in this world yet. I don't want to lose myself among the masses. I need help, advice, insight, anything. Please help me, I don't know what to do right now. P.S. I messed up my sleep schedule so bad, it's 4:15 am at the time I'm finishing this. So my days and nights are severely messed up. Just another problem, pile keeps on getting bigger. Thank you for listening, I look forward to reading your responses.