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How not to lust and to find the opposite sex attractive?

Member
I need skillfull knowledge and help with this. Please do not respond with "have faith and pray". I need some real help with this.
 
Member
How can you not look at women? They are everywhere, and with how they dress these days it makes it harder. Everyone is wearing spandex pants and tv is even worse. I just dont get how to not look lustfully at women. I try to avoid all visual contact but i feel like i cant help it sometimes.
 
Member
Put out all images that provoke you to lust or covet after women, throw out the TV get it out of the house as soon as possible stop watching images of immodest dressed women and every time turn your head away the other side after a while it gets easier and easier as the grip that the lust has upon a man gets lessened if not watched lustfully.

But most important No. 1 by far is CRY OUT to GOD

Cry out really cry out for Him to take away all that does not belong in you and let Him Fill you by His Grace and Love

James 4:
7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

God Bless you,
Dutch
 
Moderator
Staff Member
I need skillfull knowledge and help with this. Please do not respond with "have faith and pray". I need some real help with this.
@a23t

I am going to to say to you "have faith and pray"

Why......because the word of the Lord is true and won't fail you

The devil is a liar and will whisper your failing into your ear

But the word of God says:

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
Philippians 4:13

So commit your problem to Him and trust the He will get you through this.......and take action to show that you are committed to want to change

If you keep feeding a stray cat that comes into your garden....it will not go away.
It will keep coming back for more and more and try to make its abode with you

The same with your lustful thoughts and feelings.......if you keep on feeding them by actively looking at these women.....then the lustful thoughts won't go away.

There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

 
Member
I need skillfull knowledge and help with this. Please do not respond with "have faith and pray". I need some real help with this.

My friend, we must continually ask God to help us see other s through His eyes. The picture you will receive is quite different from His point of view. Instead of a woman dressed like a temptress we can see a damaged soul desperate for God's affection.
There is of course only one way to walk in this lifestyle- to walk in the Spirit. Like Christ we are to be led of the Spirit, empowered by trhe Spirit, doing the Father's will and speaking His Words. Anything else is subject to the flesh and will yield corruption in one form or another.
Press into God, when you are walking near enough to His heart the thing you seek will come naturally as the fruit if the Spirit is born out in you.

Gal 5:16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

Gal 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Gal 5:23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
Gal 5:24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
Gal 5:25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.


1Sa 10:6 And the Spirit of the LORD will come upon thee, and thou shalt prophesy with them, and shalt be turned into another man.
 
Moderator
Staff Member
I need skillfull knowledge and help with this. Please do not respond with "have faith and pray". I need some real help with this.
Sorry brother, but you've just disarmed yourself. Faith & Prayer are valuable weapons in the war against ones carnal nature.

This was written by Paul and the excerpt is taken from a review by John Ritenbaugh that I hope might help some.
Romans 7:22-25 [22] For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: [23] But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. [24] O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? [25] I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Review
Was Paul a novice in the faith when he wrote the book of Romans? God would hardly allow a novice to write Scripture. The apostle Paul was one of the most mature Christians who ever walked the face of the earth. But he saw himself being torn—the flesh lusting against the spirit, and the spirit against the flesh. Paul was in the middle, having to make the choice. If he had not grown spiritually, he would never have seen the conflict; his mind would have passed right over it. Thus, on the one hand, Paul delighted in his understanding of the purpose and perfection of God's law, yet on the other, that insight produced much dismay in him because he could see how far short he fell, from time to time, of its perfection.
The existence of this inward conflict is not a sign that the person is not sanctified. As long as we are in the flesh, we will never be entirely free of this struggle. Human nature does not go down without a fight. It must be overcome! In a way, this evil entity within us actually becomes part of the means of our perfection.
Overcoming is a long process, and it requires diligent and humbling effort to subdue our human nature. However, we must never allow ourselves to fall into the attitude that all of our effort is somehow justifying us before God—even though it pleases God and gratifies us. The holiest of our actions, the holiest of the actions of the holiest saints, are still full of imperfections and defects. Even some of these are done from the wrong motive. They could even qualify as being nothing more than a splendid sin in God's sight. Nevertheless, we are saved by grace through faith. Even with that, God requires that we make an effort to do what we can on our part. End

When man reflects on woman, and that woman is not his wife, he will be getting himself in dire circumstances especially if carnality (flesh) is a problem with that person. You want practical and that is difficult. Running the other way as scripture says is a help, but one would argue the difficulty say, if the woman works with you or any other situation you might want to come up with. The change must be by you and in you on how you see them. What might help is if you don't see everyone woman in a lustful fashion. Like, mom, sister, grandma, etc. My hope is that you don't also see them as such.

Remember that women are not objects, but real live people! Lust normally, will turn them into objects thereby dehumanizing them. So your task is to first get control of your imagination and to stop allowing "what if" mind games to take control. I'm sure you already know what I'm talking about. Next you need to start seeing women as they really are. As mothers, daughters, children, making them sisters/mothers in Christ Jesus. Make them human my brother!

If you must imagine something then when these thoughts start to hit imagine your Lord Christ Jesus right next to you! You do know that He is inside of you and what you do, see, thing of. He is totally aware of. Those are thoughts along with scripture which you can bring to mind that difficult as it will be to do (Remember Paul) you must continue to try to do.

That is why humility, and allowing yourself to fall to your knees in prayer and trusting that God can and will work in you the change that only He can do (Faith), will find its root in your very spirit . Continue to examine yourself daily, because the minute you believe you have it kicked will be the time you'll get attacked. The adversary doesn't sleep in trying to find ways in turning away from what you know to be true and right. Come here to TJ as you have just done. Chat, talk, find another you can have as an accountability partner, just like an alcoholic does.

Know that you are being prayed for brother. Never give up Hope and continue to fight the good fight!
Lunch is over, back to work :-(
YBIC
C4E
Takes time.

2 Corinthians 3:18 But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, [even] as by the Spirit of the Lord.
 
Member
Thank you to everyone for the help especially "christ4ever" it helped alot, i have read the bible a few times but am struggling with a relationship with god, i think that is what i need to work on and the devil knows it so he is telling me there is no hope and it is pointless to try to stop looking at women. Im not some kind of pervert i am just not happy with feeling like a slave to the women that looks practically naked. One hand i saw she is dressed like a ***** and one hand i cant not look at her. It is a battle but ill try my best and by the grace of god i hope i will have the strength to deal with it as it comes. On another note paul of the bible is awesome huh? I always get draw to paul and luke wish they were still around haha
 
Moderator
Staff Member
He will provide you the strength brother!

Isaiah 41: 10 Fear thou not; for I [am] with thee: be not dismayed; for I [am] thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

Psalm 37:39 But the salvation of the righteous [is] of the LORD: [he is] their strength in the time of trouble.

Don't worry my brother, you, I and the rest of the Body of Christ will have the opportunity to meet! We have an eternity!
John 6:39-40 And this is the Father's will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day. And this is the will of him that sent me, that every one which seeth the Son, and believeth on him, may have everlasting life: and I will raise him up at the last day.

Stay faithful my brother!
God bless you and guide you in all things. In the name of Christ Jesus I pray. Amen
C4E
 
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Administrator
Staff Member
@a23t

I highly recommend this bible based book called Every Mans Battle. You can find it here in the bookstore or order it from your local bookstore. It's excellent and offers biblical perspective and practical solution for absolute victory over lust, resisting temptation and honoring God.

In the end, you also stop hindering blessings in your life once you overcome this sin.

From Talk Jesus Bookstore:
book link

Faith and prayer is essential, in all things.

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. // Ephesians 5:3
 
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Member
I need skillfull knowledge and help with this. Please do not respond with "have faith and pray". I need some real help with this.

G’day a23t
here are some verses to ponder on to help you overcome.

[James 1:13-16] When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; (14) but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. (15) Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. (16) Don't be deceived, my dear brothers.

[1Peter 2:11] Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul.

[Matthew 5:28] But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

[Psalm 107:6] Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress.

[Psalm 107:20-21] He sent forth his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave. (21) Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men.

[Psalm 91:3] Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare and from the deadly pestilence.

[Psalm 34:19] A righteous man may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all;

We were made to overcome through the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ

[Colossians 1:14] - In whom we have redemption through his blood, [even] the forgiveness of sins:

[1John 1:7] But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.

[Heb 9:22] In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.

[Revelation 12:11] They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.

[Romans 6:11-14] In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. (12) Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. (13) Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. (14) For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.
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Bind and Defeat the strong man

[Matthew 12:29] Or again, how can anyone enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can rob his house.

[Mark 3:27] In fact, no one can enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man. Then he can rob his house.

[Luke 11:21-22] When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are safe. (22) But when someone stronger attacks and overpowers him, he takes away the armor in which the man trusted and divides up the spoils.

We are more than conquerors through Him who saved us and gave us choice to sin or live a righteous life and resisting temptation from the devil which is challenging you at the moment.

[Rom 8:38-39] For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, (39) neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

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Whom the son sets free will be free indeed. God actually has been waiting for you to lean on Him to overcome what holds you. You have our prayers and support here at TJ. I believe you can overcome

[Joel 2:32] And everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved; for on Mount Zion and in Jerusalem there will be deliverance, as the LORD has said, among the survivors whom the LORD calls.

[Luke 10:19] I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.

Have faith my friend that you will overcome this challenge you are facing today.

[Philippians 1:6] being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

[Philippians 4:6]Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Faith and prayer are paramount to overcoming the obstacles before you, God expects us to come to Him to overcome and having the word transforming our life from within

[1Peter 5:7] Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

[John 8:32] Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.

Keep fighting the good fight of faith ‘a23t’ and overcome in Jesus Name. Amen.

God Bless.
 
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