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GOOD vs. NICE: Why the Difference Matters
IntroductionModern culture has confused "good" with "nice," and the church has adopted this confusion. We've created a version of God and Christianity that prioritizes comfort over truth, affirmation over correction, and avoiding offense over speaking hard truths. But Scripture reveals something different: good and nice are not the same thing.
Defining the Terms
Nice = Avoiding conflict, telling people what they want to hear, keeping everyone comfortable, never causing discomfort
Good = Doing what's right even when it's hard, telling the truth even when it hurts, loving people enough to confront them, protecting and correcting
These can overlap, but they're fundamentally different. Nice prioritizes feelings in the moment; good prioritizes what's ultimately best.
Biblical Examples: Good but Not Nice
Parenting
Justice
Jesus HimselfWas Jesus good? Absolutely - He was perfectly good. But was He always nice?
None of that was nice. All of it was good - confronting hypocrisy, defending His Father's house, speaking hard truth, loving people enough to tell them what they needed to hear rather than what they wanted to hear.
If Jesus showed up in a modern church and behaved the way He did in the Gospels, He'd be accused of being judgmental, divisive, harsh, and unloving. He'd probably get kicked out for not being "Christ-like" enough - measured against a sanitized version of Christ the church has created.
God the FatherScripture declares that God is good (Psalm 34:8, 100:5, 145:9). But does that mean God is always nice?
None of this is "nice." All of it is good - upholding justice, punishing evil, demonstrating holiness, protecting His people.
The ultimate "not nice" moment: Revelation 20:15 - "If anyone's name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire."
Eternal judgment isn't nice. But it's perfectly good and just, because God's holiness demands sin be dealt with, and those who reject Christ have chosen to face judgment on their own merits.
Why This Matters
Proverbs 27:6 - "Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy."
A friend who tells you hard truth is good. An enemy who flatters you is just nice. The kisses feel better in the moment, but the wounds actually help you.
The modern church has defaulted to "nice" at the expense of "good":
This isn't love - it's cowardice dressed up as compassion. It's the nice parent watching their child play in traffic, unwilling to intervene because discipline might upset them.
Biblical Love Includes Correction
Hebrews 12:6 - "For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives."
God disciplines those He loves. A father who never corrects his children doesn't love them - he's just avoiding the discomfort of being the bad guy.
True love:
Sentimental "love" that affirms everything and challenges nothing isn't biblical love. It's abandonment.
Conclusion
Good and nice are not the same. Sometimes they overlap, but often they don't.
Jesus was perfectly good but not always nice. God is absolutely good but not always nice. And if we're going to follow Christ, we need to prioritize being good over being nice.
That doesn't mean being cruel or harsh for its own sake. It means loving people enough to tell them the truth, even when it costs us their approval. It means speaking hard truths in love, correcting error, calling out sin, and standing firm on Scripture even when culture demands we compromise.
The world has plenty of nice people who will tell you whatever you want to hear. What it needs is good people who will tell the truth in love, regardless of the cost.
Romans 12:2 - "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."
Good, not nice. That's the standard.
IntroductionModern culture has confused "good" with "nice," and the church has adopted this confusion. We've created a version of God and Christianity that prioritizes comfort over truth, affirmation over correction, and avoiding offense over speaking hard truths. But Scripture reveals something different: good and nice are not the same thing.
Defining the Terms
Nice = Avoiding conflict, telling people what they want to hear, keeping everyone comfortable, never causing discomfort
Good = Doing what's right even when it's hard, telling the truth even when it hurts, loving people enough to confront them, protecting and correcting
These can overlap, but they're fundamentally different. Nice prioritizes feelings in the moment; good prioritizes what's ultimately best.
Biblical Examples: Good but Not Nice
Parenting
- A nice parent lets their child play in the street to avoid the conflict of discipline
- A good parent swats their rear and tells them not to go in the street
- Hebrews 12:11 - "For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."
Justice
- A nice judge lets criminals go to avoid being harsh
- A good judge sentences them appropriately to protect society and uphold justice
- Justice without consequences isn't justice at all
Jesus HimselfWas Jesus good? Absolutely - He was perfectly good. But was He always nice?
- Called the Pharisees "vipers," "whitewashed tombs," "hypocrites," "blind guides" (Matthew 23)
- Told them "You are of your father the devil" (John 8:44)
- Made a whip and drove out the money changers, overturning tables (John 2:15)
- Called Herod "that fox" (Luke 13:32)
- Told Peter "Get behind me, Satan" (Matthew 16:23)
None of that was nice. All of it was good - confronting hypocrisy, defending His Father's house, speaking hard truth, loving people enough to tell them what they needed to hear rather than what they wanted to hear.
If Jesus showed up in a modern church and behaved the way He did in the Gospels, He'd be accused of being judgmental, divisive, harsh, and unloving. He'd probably get kicked out for not being "Christ-like" enough - measured against a sanitized version of Christ the church has created.
God the FatherScripture declares that God is good (Psalm 34:8, 100:5, 145:9). But does that mean God is always nice?
- The Flood - destroyed all but 8 people (Genesis 6-9)
- Plagues of Egypt - culminating in death of every firstborn (Exodus 7-12)
- Sodom and Gomorrah - fire and brimstone (Genesis 19)
- Angel killing 185,000 Assyrians in one night (2 Kings 19:35)
- Ananias and Sapphira struck dead for lying (Acts 5)
- The plagues of Revelation - mass judgment and death
- Elijah calling fire from heaven and executing 450 prophets of Baal (1 Kings 18)
None of this is "nice." All of it is good - upholding justice, punishing evil, demonstrating holiness, protecting His people.
The ultimate "not nice" moment: Revelation 20:15 - "If anyone's name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire."
Eternal judgment isn't nice. But it's perfectly good and just, because God's holiness demands sin be dealt with, and those who reject Christ have chosen to face judgment on their own merits.
Why This Matters
Proverbs 27:6 - "Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy."
A friend who tells you hard truth is good. An enemy who flatters you is just nice. The kisses feel better in the moment, but the wounds actually help you.
The modern church has defaulted to "nice" at the expense of "good":
- Avoiding preaching on sin to keep people comfortable
- Refusing to call out false teaching to avoid controversy
- Affirming lifestyles Scripture condemns to seem loving
- Presenting a Jesus who never challenges, corrects, or calls to repentance
This isn't love - it's cowardice dressed up as compassion. It's the nice parent watching their child play in traffic, unwilling to intervene because discipline might upset them.
Biblical Love Includes Correction
Hebrews 12:6 - "For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives."
God disciplines those He loves. A father who never corrects his children doesn't love them - he's just avoiding the discomfort of being the bad guy.
True love:
- Tells the truth even when it's uncomfortable
- Corrects error even when it causes conflict
- Calls sin what it is even when it offends
- Seeks what's ultimately best, not what feels good right now
Sentimental "love" that affirms everything and challenges nothing isn't biblical love. It's abandonment.
Conclusion
Good and nice are not the same. Sometimes they overlap, but often they don't.
Jesus was perfectly good but not always nice. God is absolutely good but not always nice. And if we're going to follow Christ, we need to prioritize being good over being nice.
That doesn't mean being cruel or harsh for its own sake. It means loving people enough to tell them the truth, even when it costs us their approval. It means speaking hard truths in love, correcting error, calling out sin, and standing firm on Scripture even when culture demands we compromise.
The world has plenty of nice people who will tell you whatever you want to hear. What it needs is good people who will tell the truth in love, regardless of the cost.
Romans 12:2 - "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."
Good, not nice. That's the standard.
