Forum for adult discussions?

[Chad]

Would you like to see a forum for adults only discussions? This will include deeper, more detailed discussions regarding sex, personal marriage matters and many ups / downs of adulthood (ie: mid life crisis). This can include serious counseling as well between members.

Do you have any suggestions as to what topics could be discussed in an adults only forum? I am thinking sex first because that is not something (in full details) that should or will be discussed on Talk Jesus forums you see currently.

Are you for or against this idea? Please share your thoughts.

 

[Jesuslovesu]

Chad While I think it is a good idea to have a section that is for adults.. My question is how would we keep the youngin's out? I stand behind you though in any changes that you bring to talk Jesus ty brother. Your sister in Christ Jlu

 

[Chad]

Basically the same way we moderate the mens and womens only forum is the same way we'll moderate the adults only forum. The description on the home page will make clear that its for "18 and over" and of course it will not contain anything TOO graphical (sexually) but still detailed enough when discussing important matters in adulthood. Sex is the obvious one while many other factors come into play.

Share your suggestions of any other adult related topics including marriage matters, personal job related issues, etc). As long as they do not fall into any other forum category, they will fall into the adults only category.

Kids

If the kids come into the forum more likely this is what I believe will happen.

a) too young to understand the sexual discussions and will leave for lack of understanding
b) young (under 18) but old enough to understand. They will still be able to learn Scripture being discussed regarding certainly "adult" matters
c) they will respect the rule and not enter the forum

 

[MavMin]

This type of thing needs to be available. I get lots of questions on such issues through my Ask The Expert site and I am not sure if it is best that many Christians are "ignorant" in this area or not. There are definitely sexual issues that need to be discussed before marriage but many women especially would not know how to discuss them or what to do if they come up after marriage.

 

[Ann]

I think it is a good idea. Issues regarding sex or other adult related issues can have a negative influence in the spiritual life of people. If it can be discussed between adults we may be able to get answers to many questions that I'm sure even people who have been married for many years may have. Resolving even the smallest problem is giving a step ahead, which we are all striving for.

And of course there is always room for improvement even if you have been married for 23 years like I have been.

I say give it a try and if it doesn't work out you can always stop it.

Thank you for all the work that you do and the commitment, we all benefit from it.

Blessings!

 

[Coconut]

If you create an adult forum, I suggest it be only accessable by registered members, not the general public, personally I think all counseling forums should require a pw.

 

[MavMin]

Good point, Coconut but then again there are so many forums that will give a 15 year old a checklist to see if she is ready for sex that are wide open to the public do we want to lock down a Scriptural one? Maybe we need one for R rated discussions and another for something that might require more description or topics that some might feel are more NC-17. On my Ask The Expert page I get asked some really interesting questions.

The last one was not "sexual" but dealt with sexuality since the lady was married in '04 and since then the preacher has come out as gay. She wanted to know if her marriage was still spiritually valid. Do let a discussion like that be open or closed?

 

[david_james]

Basically the same way we moderate the mens and womens only forum is the same way we'll moderate the adults only forum. The description on the home page will make clear that its for "18 and over".

There is no way to enforce this. People will go in anyways.

Kids

If the kids come into the forum more likely this is what I believe will happen.

a) too young to understand the sexual discussions and will leave for lack of understanding
b) young (under 18) but old enough to understand. They will still be able to learn Scripture being discussed regarding certainly "adult" matters
c) they will respect the rule and not enter the forum

a) The kids would ask parents and parents could get mad and sue
b) This age group are usually not mature enough.
c) don't be so sure

 

[Cody]

You could always have an agreement before the page saying that you must be 18 years or older to view the forum. If you put that, there couldn't be any law suits because of the warning? I'm thinking that is right, not sure though.

We can tell when someone goes into a thread because it leaves a history of all the users at the bottom of the page, so we can give warnings and infractions to under aged kids that go into the threads. I also believe this forum should be for users only.

 

[trulyblezzed]

I think it's a great idea because I'm young but I'm married so alot of my friends aren't able to give me marriage counseling. I'm all for this forum!

Proverbs 9:9 Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning

 

[By His Grace]

I think its a great idea and will educate many,
i agree with coconut that it should have a password,
there will be a sense of security.

 

[ronaldo]

i think no we will be left out most of the time all will be in the adult room !

 

[bruren777]

Adult's only!

An adult's only forum is a good idea, because this is a Christian Website, I would hope that it would be with a Christian perspective.

I was on another website where it was suggested that a forum be started for adults only. It didn't take long for things to get really disgusting.

People don't realize that their screen name can be used by another person from an entirely different website. That other person can post things that most people wouldn't think of posting.

Anyone can google a screen name, if it happens to be the same as yours, it could be embarrassing. I had different screen name than the one I have now. That screen name was being used by a gay guy on another website, he was vulgar. I changed my screen name!

 

[SpiritLedEd]

I voted "no".We already have a Men's forum, a Women's forum, and a counseling forum. Aren't they for adult subjects? I don't think we need another forum.

SLE

 

[shingie]

I think w need security levels

Chad I think we need kids to also access the site because there are some staff for old people that help kids esp when it comes to abstinence and understand what God`s word says about it. There should be some security levels that grants access to kids up to a certain level of information.

 

[Whendancer]

A password is a good idea

Chad, thank you for taking a poll on this. It's always nice to know that our imput matters.

Whendancer

 

[happyharold4]

I am only a visitor here but my vote if asked would be no not needed----You have a good Christian site here and that type of format good easily go south and the whole site could be damaged as a result----I'd say stick with what you have as it's pretty well covered.

Happy

 

[Kit Carson]

Good point, Coconut but then again there are so many forums that will give a 15 year old a checklist to see if she is ready for sex that are wide open to the public do we want to lock down a Scriptural one? Maybe we need one for R rated discussions and another for something that might require more description or topics that some might feel are more NC-17. On my Ask The Expert page I get asked some really interesting questions.

The last one was not "sexual" but dealt with sexuality since the lady was married in '04 and since then the preacher has come out as gay. She wanted to know if her marriage was still spiritually valid. Do let a discussion like that be open or closed?

This one just jumped out at me.

Yes the lady in question in 04 her marriage is valid and all is O.K with God so long as we know all the facts. If presented as it has been then the ones being married were innocent of the fact the preacher was gay. Their marriage was conducted by them with all good intent and with all that is required for marriage.

What a preacher does or if he does fall later or is deceptive in his way, is between the preacher and God. It will not reflect upon the innocents who trusted him. As long as they trusted God, and wished to obey, God knows this and it is no reflection upon them.

See how easy that was to answer without any graphic details. And could also provide support for the youngsters too.

I think all things can be answered by Gods will and out of the bible with no need for a lot of details.

Young people most of all have lots to combat in this world, they are the ones who need support the most.

Kit

 

[Whendancer]

Why Would We Need A Forum About Sex?

Hello, Again, Chad, I just got "hooked" into this thread again from a new response. And, after reviewing some of the other responses, I am going to have to again with HappyHarold04 (?) on this one.

Nothing goes "south" like discussing something that is so personal and intimate. Those chats can take on an unwholesomeness that would reflect very little of Christ and more of "flesh".

Blessings!
Beverly aka Whendancer

 

[B-A-C]

My first instinct is to be against it.

Not only do I think "letting the younguns in" would be bad, but I also think there are certain subjects that men discuss with other men, and women with other women, and that line shouldn't be crossed either. I'm not sure how you would enforce this.

I have been on TJ for about 3 years now, and I love this place. I frequently chat and post more than my share of messages, but it doesn't take the place of church. Nor should it. This is a little hard to explain, but here goes a shot...

Some people watch church on TV. They say "church is church, it isn't a building" and while I agree with that, the church is a body of people.

I can't really tithe if I'm at home. (some churches let you "mail in" checks).
But I don't know that guy in the 3rd row, or that lady in the 5th row on TV, so I can't know how to pray for them. They don't even know I exist, so they can't pray for me. There is no prayer support, no encouragement from the body. I have no accountability to anyone, and no one has any accountability to me. How can I do a ministry from home? How can I show the fruits and share my gifts of the spirit to other believers (to edify the body) if I'm not around them?
I attend a small group (a bible study of sorts) and we know everyone in the group very well, we have dinners at each other houses, and call each other when we are sick, or traveling, or miss church unexpectedly. We help each other move, we know wives, husbands, kids and grandkids, and we have personal relationships that are hard to build on-line. (especially with an entire online community). I care for these people and pray fopr these people in a different way than I do with people I know from TJ.

While I have gotten to know a "very few" people well enough here on TJ that they pray for me and I pray for them and we share personal things, they aren't always the kinds of things I would recommend shared in a "public" forum.

My two (make it three) cents.