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Custody of my kids

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Ive asked yall to pray for me before over my situation with my kids. Apparently after i filed for child support he got a lawyer and is now saying he wants 50/50 custody. I dont have a lawyer yet. I wasnt expecting him to do that anyway. He has went weeks without seeing our kids and my daughter who is now 8 months old acts like she dont know who he is. In the last couple months he has seen them 3 times. I never let him have them without me around because i cant trust him with them. I dont know what to do. I cant stand the thought of them being sent over there half the time. My son is so used to me putting him to bed every night and im the one who has always taken care of both of them. I just cant do it. Im not one of those people who are trying to use the kids against the other parent. Please dont think that of me. Their dad just never really stepped up as a dad and thats part of the reason we broke up. I felt like i was doing it all alone so i didnt want to stay with him.
Everyone please continue to pray for the kids and me. I had a meeting with my lawyer today and its not looking like its going to go in my favor. He will probably get 50/50

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