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Adultery

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what happens when there is adultery amongst christians?
What happens to the children of the marriage thats affected, and how do other church members deal with it.

I had two cases I suppose you call it with children who's parent commited adultery.

One the mum divorced the dad. They go to separate churches, she has custody of the daughter.
The other i think they separated but didnt divorce (yet) but the adulterous mum got custody of the youngest daughter. The dad had the other three children and went to a different church but and the mum doesnt go to any, she hasnt repented and still seeing the ...adulterer. Who was the husbands best friend. What a betrayal.

Anyway am not here to judge or condemn thats just what happened. My concern isnt for the adults who are responisble for their own actions. Im just wondering about the children are they getting proper care?

Is it my place to say something to the adults or is it just to be a friend to the children. I think God wants me to care and pray for the children as they belong to Him though I notice hes only giving me girls. I feel kind of like a nanny, although am not qualified to be one!

The daughters can only see their dads when their mum wants them to see him. Is this a good or bad thing.

Another mum I was called to get alongside had two daughters and she was struggling in her faith and she wouldnt tell me the reason for her divorce. It then dawned on me she was the adulterous one in her heart, and she had kind of broken a relationship to marry this man(after the divorce she was wanting to date a younger unbeliever) but her husband wasnt a believer. However the daughters that were affected, got closer to God and now attend youth group.

Confused? I was and still am. Sometimes I think why cant I have normal friendships with christians who kept their word, and who when they marry stuck with their vows.
 
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Am also not sure if because of divorced/adulterous parents its ok to teach the ten commandments because of the one about adultery. One bible teacher said she avoided it.

I teach bible in schools. As am not married myself I wonder if should say anything. I do think its wrong and singles can be affected by adultery too..i mean i have had married men come on to me before.
 
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I hope this isnt taken as gossip these things are out in the public actually.

What confuses me is..when the person who commits adultery then goes to another church. Does that mean they have repented? I dont think its happened that they then remarry with the person they commited adultery with..

But what happened in the churches Ive attended is when someone commits adultery, even if it was a minister they were told to leave the church. Maybe its just that one they attended with their spouse?

Its all very complicated :-(
I think if someone has commited adultery they wouldnt want to come to church anyway. But then theres a case of a workmate who told me her husband who was like a minister cheated on her. She kept her faith, left his church if course and went to a different one and he carried on with his own as he was like this evnagelist. She had a son.

I mean these people are elder than me in faith and I thought they would be people I can look up to, one used to be my neighbour, so was really shocked that all this stuff happened.

I sometimes chat with the daughter who is i think about 9 years old now as see her sometimes but that neighbour family that split all left that church. The husband goes somewhere else with the other children one joined the navy but the adulterous wife doesnt go anywhere. I cant really say much about her faith as all the time in that church she was there but she wasnt really there so I wasnt sure what her relationship with God was truly like, if shed come to a bible study or sat near me maybe I would know but all I know is she was raised in church. If i knew her better maybe could have said something or prayed for her marriage i just feel bad for the children :-(

I think the bible does say if someone is sinning and weak someone who is stronger can restore them? Since she no longer comes to church hardly see her anyway..and she hasnt asked for help from me but sometimes do see her from afar when she goes to help her mum and dad and her duaghter wants to chat with me. Her daughter just thinks her mum and dad are being silly but her 'uncle' the guy her mum is with is around more often.

Do we just pray that God will sort their marriage out but in the meantime just be real awkward when seeing either mum or dad knowing they arent together as man and wife anymore and just learn not to ask oh hows so and so or expect them ever to do stuff together as a married couple ever again?! From one friend that knows them much better when asked if they were ever getting back together she was like NO DEFINATELY NOT!

Arrgh. And the parents are quite ashamed that their daughters marriage is broken but nothing much they can do as they say she wont listen or repent. Maybe when shes bored of the 'uncle' or he leaves or something?
 

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