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New Member
Jesus says if you lust in your heart over another woman who is not your wife you commit adultery, does your wife then have the right to divorce you if she found out because you have been unfaithful. unfaithfulness being the one reason you can be divorced.
It depends, if she hated her husband for it she would be guilty of murder and then there would be no reason for divorce because she would be considered a widow.::coocoo:
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Matthew 5:27-28

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Matthew 19:7-8

7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?

8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.

When a man looks on another woman who is not his wife, he is committing adultery with her because it is his heart that is 'lost' to her. Now, the reason that divorce is even in the pisture is from the verses in Matthew 19 I shared here. I do not know someone's heart if they do not open it to me. God knows and only He can truly know. Since God knows the heart, speculating the spirituality of another in this context is not for me to do. There ARE ways to know someone's heart. By watching them and seeing what they do.

Also, the Word says, in Matthew 12:34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.

35 A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things.

I believe that a woman who finds out her husband is looking at other women and lusting after them, needs to speak with her husband and not take lightly what has happened. Jesus did not make the 'law' of divorce. When God said, 'the two shall become one flesh', it was NOT to be taken lightly. In society, it is too easy to get a divorce. Divorce is literally a 'death'. A breaking away from the other person. I would not will any person to get a divorce.

I come from a family where my parents divorced when I was quite young...3 maybe. My life growing up was hard. Do not...I repeat do not...allow satan to tell you divorce is easy and there are no consequences...because there are.

I don't know what brought this topic up...but do not take lightly the bond that God ordained for a husband and wife.
New Member
Law vs Truth and Grace (and divorce)

Does a woman have a right to divorce her husband for adultery under the Law?

No she does not. There would be no need, and she would not want to divorce him anyway.

But don't expect that fact to save a marriage.

In fact, the Law doesn't disolve broken marriages with divorce. The Law in its purest form (as written and codified in the Torah and not as practiced by rabinnical folks near Jesus time on Earth who cut corners and allowed loopholes) destroys a broken marriage utterly -- with death.

Assuming a woman could prove her husband was adulterous, there was but one result:

The penalty for adultery was death by stoning.

The husband and his other woman would be killed for their sin and the wife would remain alive as his legal widow -- with full rights and title to any properties he owned. Why would she want to divorce him and lose those rights? She would not. She would watch him die in disgrace and be redeemed as a justified widow who could then even marry again if someone else would take her.

Again, under the Law the ONLY thing that waits an adulterer is death.

There was no animal sacrifice that could be made to get you out of it.

The closest you could come to redemption in adultery was if you as a single man took a single woman who was not another man's wife to your bed, then repented of the hasty act and rightfully married her afterwards to redeem you both.

That's it -- everything else brought fatal consequences.

So again I ask, why do you care what the woman's rights are under the Law?

Under the Law, the adulterer is a dead man who is damned to Hell.

That pretty much wraps up what you need to know about adultery and the Law.


We are supposed to be wiser than this by now.
We are not Jews.
We are not under the Law.

Perhaps you should spend some time reading the Gospel to see how adultery is handled under Grace?

The adulterous husband confesses and repents.
The wife forgives.

She may have the right to divorce him...but if she follows Christ's example and really forgives him in her heart, there is no need for her to do so. And if she *does* forgive him that way -- would he not then remember all the reasons why he loved her in the first place? Could it not revive the marriage?

Put the marriage under the Grace of Jesus Christ and leave the ministry of death that is the Law in the Old Testament where it belongs.
New Member
Some of these answers have been pretty harsh to me, but nevertheless, they are true.
Part of my life story is that my husband has divorced me, not because I committed adultery, for many other reasons.

However, he cheated on me with porn, emailing and chatting with women online and finally, actually being physical with other women. I left him, but when he asked to come back, I let him back into my heart. But I could not trust him like before either. I am finding that I am having a hard time trusting any man that I am interested in, and I would rather end a relationship before it even starts so that I don't have to worry about whether he is truthful, faithful and committed.

Now my two sons go back and forth between me and him, and he lives with his girlfriend and her children. He cheated on her and she took him back. It seems that the cycle continues, but I don't want my boys to think it's okay to disrespect women in that way. It's difficult because that's what they see.

I don't want to tell you that no one does it, but when you are tempted to 'lust', turn your mind to something else immediately. Who knew the consequences to lust for me and my ex husband? I think our divorce could have been avoided completely, in fact, I tried to reconcile many times, but he was more interested in finding other women, so I let him go. I do not wait for him anymore, but I am not ready to commit myself to another man either.
I don't know if you're married or not- if you're married the consequences will affect everyone in your family if you do not take control now. If you're not married, it could affect a future relationship and your commitment to it.
Loyal Member
I am trying to make sense of adultery and whether a divorce is justified when theres children who have to go back and forth between mum and dad as several people I know do this I even flatted eith someone at the time who had two children however she wasnt married to the dad of the children even though they split I think thats different cos they hadnt actually made a commitment or vow before God.

I have one friend whos separated from her husband but still have no idea WHY as she doesnt even want to talk about it or even mention his name.

It has come to the point where, Im thinking God is this any of my business but I dont want to be involved in their messy relationships when maybe I should be encouraging them to actually reconcile with their exes..? Like FORGIVE?

Because some of the exes actually go to church (different one) doesnt this show they are still believers and their marriage could be restored and they are not seeing anyone else. Plus their children are growing up only seeing one parent at a time and I just think they are losing out.

How are the children meant to know whos home they belong to?!

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