Dovegiven
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- Oct 13, 2012
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Dear @Dovegiven
Appreciate feeling that fear brother!
A paralyzing fear! So, totally overwhelming to me that I was immobilized I could barely speak and had no clarity of thought whatsoever, but the "fear" and every thought the enemy could throw at me in generating it. For me it took shouting out the name of Jesus, which broke that fear and then jumping out of my seat and running out the door to go about the task that needed doing!!!
For me it was and is the realization that there is power in the name of Jesus, and whenever that fear tries to present itself again.....it takes off at the name above all other names Jesus!!!
Thanks for reminding me of that memory brother.
Apologies for diverting from the subject, to post this.
With the Love of Christ Jesus.
YBIC
Nick
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I think your comment is on track with the topic. That incident happened a few years ago, beginning with a large annual meeting of local church leaders, including pastors, teachers, and various Christian ministries. It's a fund raiser for a list of community projects. The keynote speaker was a prison chaplain. He covered the many blessings and the hazards of his ministry, recounting some terrifying moments, once when caught up in a revolt that lasted half a day. He was sheltered by some Christian prisoners and a guard until his area was cleared. I was blessed with the group, deeply appreciating his faithfulness of 30 years doing that. When the time came I put a check in, glad someone was doing the "dirty work" few would choose to do, and joined the others for catch-up small talk. The preacher stood at the exit, shaking hands, blessing. When I shook his hand is when he made that request. It totally caught me off guard. I was shocked. "Me?, Why me?" I had never dreamed of doing such a thing. He said words I didn't remember, but do remember "The Lord pointed you out. I have been praying for a partner. At least pray about this." I prayed alright. "Lord, please give him an experienced man!" Eventually was added what I remembered Jesus prayed "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done." That didn't make me feel any better.
I realize now it was Satan or a demon over my shoulder, words of discouragement, taking advantage of any level of fear or insufficiency, though at the time I didn't suspect that. I think it was more of a fear like the first time I was part of non-drill general quarters and had to help get helicopters below deck. We never knew what it was about, as nothing bad happened except for a lot more training to shorten the time taken for that task. But the guys on deck in an attack are not likely to survive. Training gets you through, though I had no heads up for what the preacher wanted done.
That fear that night was irrational because I wasn't specifically prepared to do something new like that for God, yet was full of the word of God and power of the Spirit to do things I like doing. I had only done occasional preaching, regular Bible classes, online chat since that first began on the internet, and street witnessing. Although I never experienced a bad incident in those prison visits, I have learned Satan indeed seeks to sift workers like wheat, not bothering with folks only warming a pew. But I also realize when wheat is sifted, the chaff blows away, and the seed remains. I'm still learning to always be the remaining seed if that happens. If it happens it would be because I let my guard down worse than that night. Being sifted is also a regular chore at harvest time, not a curse except maybe for the workers' hard work, like I've seen at Indian tribes harvesting wild rice manually. If Satan were to do the sifting, it isn't me or a friend sifting. I don't think I have yet been sifted by the Devil, and don't figure on that since I observe being submitted to God, which includes accepting His chastening and flogging when needed, resisting the Devil, and having abiding faith he will flee from me.
Peter was full of self confidence and lack of comprehension of the mission of Jesus, wanting what Peter wanted. So I will guard myself against repeating his error. I will also not argue with anyone who should be the greater of two or ten or a thousand in God's Kingdom.