I'm not really sure where to post this, so forgive me if I'm in the wrong place. Why is it that the more good I do and the more I obey God, the worse my life gets? I know it happens to everyone and that satan tries to discourage us, but in my case it's very severe, almost to the point where I feel like God is playing some kind of joke on me. I mean the more I try, the worse everything gets for me and if I'm involved in anything, it's garaunteed to fail. I suffer from severe depression and severe anxiety and panic attacks because of the nonstop barrage of bad things that happen to me. In the last 6 months I have lost all of my friends, failed at a business, and my fiancee left me for absolutely no reason and I am completely alone left to spend all of my time trapped inside of my messed up head with all of my bizarre thoughts and fears. It's like whenever God tells me to do something, I do it and then more bad things are piled on me and my depression and anxiety gets worse and worse. My prayers for God to heal me of these things has turned into pleading, my pleading has turned into begging, and it never gets better, only worse. It seems the more I pray, the worse I get. I've been dealing with this for 9 yearsand am at the point where it's hard to leave my house because I'm so depressed and am in constant panic mode. I can also feel this very dark, heavy, and evil vibe that radiates off of me. Why is God letting this happen to me and how can I make it go away?