My pain and guilt is becoming too much

[CometelyLost]

I don't know what I'm doing on this site but I came across it by accident. My pain is getting too much for me. I got married last May and lost a job days after my marriage and I still have no job and its taking a toll on my marriage and evenmore so, me. My wife is footing all the bills and has two little boys that see me as their father. She has a great job but kids, a mortgage, and everyday bills are too much and I feel so guilty right now. The guilt is becoming so unbearable that I don't see any relief from it soon. I just sit in my car and feel so guilty for how my life's turned out. She's winning the game of life and I have accomplished nothing and am a burden.

I didn't grow up that way. I didn't grow up to be a dependent or a burden on someone. The only way I can get by or help her with anything is borrowing money from her mother. I can't go to mine. I'm not really close to my family. I moved up to StL with her and this isn't how I planned out my life going. She's pushed me to do so much by finishing up my degree and toleratin my mood swings that I have now because of my situation. I try not to infect her but my mood is usually upbeat and always happy but I have nothin to be happy about. Our situation is starting to make her cry now and I can't handle that. This isn't suppose to be how newlyweds go through there first year. My pain and guilt is becoming too much for me to bare. I'm writin this outside of a Walmart where I've been sitting for about an hour in my car just thinking.

I honestly don't think Jesus likes me. My life hasn't changed since a young age. Its just been very tiresome and there have been moments in my past where I almost gave up. I just can seem to ge a break in life and I desperately need it right now.

I just feel so lost right now.

 

[Brad Huber]

Life, despite what the world teaches, is not successful or failure based upon our material worth. Read about the story of Joseph, he suffered many terrible things far far beyond what you, I, or anyone else have had to endure, and yet he had faith throughout it all.

Prov 3:5-6 Trust the Lord with "all" your heart, and lean not on your "own" understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.

Never the less, I understand and have empathy with you, I am praying for you brother!

 

[RJ]

I don't know what I'm doing on this site but I came across it by accident. My pain is getting too much for me. I got married last May and lost a job days after my marriage and I still have no job and its taking a toll on my marriage and evenmore so, me. My wife is footing all the bills and has two little boys that see me as their father. She has a great job but kids, a mortgage, and everyday bills are too much and I feel so guilty right now. The guilt is becoming so unbearable that I don't see any relief from it soon. I just sit in my car and feel so guilty for how my life's turned out. She's winning the game of life and I have accomplished nothing and am a burden.

I didn't grow up that way. I didn't grow up to be a dependent or a burden on someone. The only way I can get by or help her with anything is borrowing money from her mother. I can't go to mine. I'm not really close to my family. I moved up to StL with her and this isn't how I planned out my life going. She's pushed me to do so much by finishing up my degree and toleratin my mood swings that I have now because of my situation. I try not to infect her but my mood is usually upbeat and always happy but I have nothin to be happy about. Our situation is starting to make her cry now and I can't handle that. This isn't suppose to be how newlyweds go through there first year. My pain and guilt is becoming too much for me to bare. I'm writin this outside of a Walmart where I've been sitting for about an hour in my car just thinking.

I honestly don't think Jesus likes me. My life hasn't changed since a young age. Its just been very tiresome and there have been moments in my past where I almost gave up. I just can seem to ge a break in life and I desperately need it right now.

I just feel so lost right now.

Sorry for your dispear.
You are here by no accident, you must believe that and that there are no coincidences in life.

• It is time to get him in your life: Romans 10:8-13...understanding this and believing this is where you will be found and no longer lost.
• You have as much right to this as anyone for Romans 3:10 God is perfect and capable of forgiving you of anything.
• No, Jesus does more than like you, he loves you more than anyone and perfectly 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ...other translations says it keeps no record fo wrong. He doesn't hold anything against you: Romans 8:1
• Your salvation and path to peace is to understand faith and that it is not from you but it is from grace and a gift of God. Ephisiams 2:8.
• Chose to seek him and recieving his free gift is up to you, you have to take his gift, no one can do that for you.
• Welcome, TJ is a great place for you: I am sure that many will try to help!
• The first start is to change you TJ name. Maybe something "like Looking For Jesus" and then once you have done that you can change it to something like "Found Jesus" !

 

[eddieb]

I don't know what I'm doing on this site but I came across it by accident. My pain is getting too much for me. I got married last May and lost a job days after my marriage and I still have no job and its taking a toll on my marriage and evenmore so, me. My wife is footing all the bills and has two little boys that see me as their father. She has a great job but kids, a mortgage, and everyday bills are too much and I feel so guilty right now. The guilt is becoming so unbearable that I don't see any relief from it soon. I just sit in my car and feel so guilty for how my life's turned out. She's winning the game of life and I have accomplished nothing and am a burden.

I didn't grow up that way. I didn't grow up to be a dependent or a burden on someone. The only way I can get by or help her with anything is borrowing money from her mother. I can't go to mine. I'm not really close to my family. I moved up to StL with her and this isn't how I planned out my life going. She's pushed me to do so much by finishing up my degree and toleratin my mood swings that I have now because of my situation. I try not to infect her but my mood is usually upbeat and always happy but I have nothin to be happy about. Our situation is starting to make her cry now and I can't handle that. This isn't suppose to be how newlyweds go through there first year. My pain and guilt is becoming too much for me to bare. I'm writin this outside of a Walmart where I've been sitting for about an hour in my car just thinking.

I honestly don't think Jesus likes me. My life hasn't changed since a young age. Its just been very tiresome and there have been moments in my past where I almost gave up. I just can seem to ge a break in life and I desperately need it right now.

I just feel so lost right now.

you said "I honestly don't think Jesus likes you" I have been right where you are now. I have felt that despair. the hopelessness. And what I can tell you about it from my experience is you can not see a way out of this. And all your logic tells you there is no way to by your power fix it. But I can tell you of a certainty there is a way out because I got out of that slump. You also spoke of needing a break right now. Does God lie? For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (jer 29:11)
God knows what he is doing. and I tell you that you need to get thankful for what you got. you need to start praising God. there is power in praise. start looking at what you got good in your life God has done for you. for instance you got a wife. I dont have a wife. you also have a car. and obviously somehow you got gas in your car to get to walmart. My advice is to stop doubting God and start having faith. Stop looking at your problems at look to God. God is God in the good times and God is God in the bad times, God is God on the mountain top, and God is God in the valley. Now consider the mountains. We all love to be on the mountain top dont we. Where life just couldnt get any better. It is easy to praise God in those times. But I ask you is God unworthy of praise just because you arent living high on the hog? But look at the mountian tops and tell me what you see/ ice caps and rocks. Now look to the valley and tell me what you see. green green green. Trees and grass. It is in the valleys we grow. That we become stronger. And also where we learn to trust God more. So I tell you, embrace your valley because God does know what He is doing. Acknowledge God in all your ways and He will direct your paths.
So stop sitting in your car in a parking lot having a pity party. No good will come of it. The break you speak of desperately needing is Jesus. If you seek Him out and you start walking in the spirit God will remove the abrasive traits you mentioned you having towards your wife. God can fix all that. And also i read a study once about the first 2 years of a marriage are usually the hardest. Just seek God and let Him have his way. If you do this I think you will find It turns out that you wouldnt want it any other way.
and you are right, Jesus doesnt like you.... HE LOVES YOU!!!
matt 10:30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

edit: Christ is the sum and substance of life. A christians JOY is independent of outward conditions. Paul had joy in prison. Joy ultimately arises from fellowship with Jesus. A good read for you I think would be philippians.

 

[Fragrant Grace]

For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Romans 6:23

Greetings @CometelyLost

You are not completely lost.....the Lord has led you here
He loves you and He longs to give you His free gift of salvation

And He will accept you just as you are....no matter what you have done, no matter what your problems are
He loves you

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
John 3:16

Just as I am, without one plea,
But that Thy blood was shed for me,
And that Thou bidst me come to Thee,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, and waiting not
To rid my soul of one dark blot,
To Thee whose blood can cleanse each spot,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, though tossed about
With many a conflict, many a doubt,
Fightings and fears within, without,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
Sight, riches, healing of the mind,
Yea, all I need in Thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, Thou wilt receive,
Wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve;
Because Thy promise I believe,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, Thy love unknown
Hath broken every barrier down;
Now, to be Thine, yea, Thine alone,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, of that free love
The breadth, length, depth, and height to prove,
Here for a season, then above,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come!*


*Charlotte Elliott 1835

 

[CometelyLost]

I hear what you all are saying. Its just so hard right now with no job and no money coming in. I don't get any unemployment so I literally have no money. I try to stay optimistic but its increasingly hard as I had interviews and didnt get either of them.

 

[Fragrant Grace]

I hear what you all are saying. Its just so hard right now with no job and no money coming in. I don't get any unemployment so I literally have no money. I try to stay optimistic but its increasingly hard as I had interviews and didnt get either of them.

Greetings @CometelyLost

I understand how hard it must be for you.

Here at Talk Jesus we can point you to our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ
He accepts you just as you are
You don't need any money
And His free gift to you is better than money can ever buy.....forgiveness from sin and a certainty of eternal life

Come unto Me and I will give you rest
Matthew 11:21

 

[eddieb]

I hear what you all are saying. Its just so hard right now with no job and no money coming in. I don't get any unemployment so I literally have no money. I try to stay optimistic but its increasingly hard as I had interviews and didnt get either of them.

1 peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

My money right now is not constant flow and has been awhile since I had enough to do anything with. Money is not promised in scripture. The only thing I can find promised in scripture is food and clothes. I have never even been able to apply for unemployment due to having crummy jobs. Where I live there are no interviews for anything I know how to do. I have to wait till spring before I can get more work. and cold fronts keep blowing in. There is a song that comes to mind, it goes like..... Glory glory Hallelujah, since I laid my burdens down.... thats what you need to do. get on your knees and lay your burdens down at Gods feet. Just as it says in 1 peter 5:7 cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you. Even Jesus was overwhelmed by the weight of the cross and needed someone to help him carry his cross. Give it to God and He will take it. God dont want you tired or stressed.

 

[RJ]

I hear what you all are saying. Its just so hard right now with no job and no money coming in. I don't get any unemployment so I literally have no money. I try to stay optimistic but its increasingly hard as I had interviews and didnt get either of them.

• If you can only understand that you are here for a purpose that this is not a coincidence.
• Their are other options until you get your feet on the ground. Have you applied for unemployment or food stamp benefits?
• When one door closes another one will open if you have faith.
• It is one thing to be down on your luck and poor in money but it is much worse to be poor in spirit!
• God wants to give you his free gift of the Holy Spirit but you need to ask him for it. If you don't know how, TJ's is the perfect place to find out ; just ask and plenty will tell you how!

 

[Notworthy]

Turn to Jesus brother, turn and repent. Find a church, repent and start following God. It is written in the Bible, "Be still, and know that I am God" your problems are never too big for the one that created the stars and the heavens! So glad you found this brother! Please go to church, seek Jesus, only He can heal you. Jesus says,

Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and He with me.

Revelation 3 :20

Seek Jesus, not only will He show you a better life, but through Him you are able to do things you wouldn't be able to. It also says,

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. God bless