When I was young, my wife and I went to a counselor once a month over a few years. He helped us to communicate. You see men and women don't speak the same language. It was then that I learned about kicking the dog. You see, when your wife or your boss bites your head off and you don’t know why, you may be the dog. Being the dog is not fun, but it is a back handed complement. You ask how can it be a complement? You see, the person doing the kicking considers you a safe target, when they can’t kick the person or thing that has caused most of the pain. If you can control your feelings while being kicked and ask questions about your wife’s feelings you may get to the source of the problem and be able to relieve some of her pain. This may work for your boss but be careful.