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    12 Ways to be Transformed by the Renewing of Our Mind

    Renewal begins by offering up our whole body, soul, mind and spirit to the Lord. Luke 10:27 tells us, “And he answered, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind…” It takes a conscious effort to present oneself to the Lord by disciplining ourselves for godliness.

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Can you please give me reviews on this song Ive written

Discussion in 'Arts' started by Jesusgirlkk, Jul 24, 2010.

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  1. Jesusgirlkk

    Jesusgirlkk New Member

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    vs.1 "some trust in silver others in gold, some trust in fame might and glory but all that will perish it fadeth away all but Gods power and story"
    chorus "so we trust God, when the pains of life have come, we trust God completly full and wholy, we trust God he fadeth not away, we trust God through all we trust God"
    vs.2 "he is in charge he maketh it all and we give our lifes to him he knows us he sees the sparrows fall he sees it all and we are important to him he knows us" repeat chorus.
    Please honestly tell me all your thoughts I know it's not amasing and needs a little work but I want others opionon on what to change.
     
  2. Quenton

    Quenton New Member

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    First of all it's really difficult to make a four line song not rhyme. So if your going to do a four line song it's best if it rhymes. Otherwise you can always add more lines.

    What genre are you meloding in your head?
     
  3. Jesusgirlkk

    Jesusgirlkk New Member

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    Thank I will think about a way to fix that and i the music I have written for it is more like an old time hymn like amasing grace or anything in that genre. Sorry I don't know the term for it but its not ccm or anything
     
  4. Quenton

    Quenton New Member

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    thats something like where I had to go with it in my head but just see what you can do and i'll take another look at it next time :)
     

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