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adultey and divorce - 02-23-07, 07:31 PM

One of the biggest problems with the topic of divorce is people mix the old and new covenants up. Matt chapter 19 must be taken in context with who Jesus was talking to, why he said what he said, and why was the dialog going on.

I corth 10: 32 tells us there are three groups we must rightly divide when we read the bible, the church, the Jews and the lost or gentiles

Matt 19 address divorce but in regards to a question the Pharisees asked him. He was addressing the question they asked him about Marriage under the LAW. It also states they were trying to tempt him to break the Law so they would have grounds to arrest him and discredit him. Jesus explained that divorce was granted by Moses due to the hardness of people’s heart. However, Jesus stated it was not so in the beginning. God never intended divorce, however, once sin entered the earth, divorce is a fact of life. We must understand that the church was NEVER to fall under the Law; neither was the world or gentiles. The law was written to the Jews, so he is addressing divorce under the Law and the Jews.

Today, the Jewish law about divorce does not pertain to you and I. God still hates divorce, but the church falls under the law of LOVE. I could say allot of things here, but know this. God does not like divorce, but loves people who have divorced. The church has so blown out of proportion Matt 19 that you can murder someone and get forgiveness, but if you divorce someone you are an out cast. They use the scriptures in Titus 1: 6, and I Tim 3: 2 and miss use it. When it says a leader should have one wife, they are talking about at that time of office and not talking about having been divorced. You must remember that Timothy and Titus were dealing with a culture that allowed multiple wives. It is not talking about divorce. Romans 7: 1-5 is not talking about divorce but comparing a marriage to us dying to the Law. He is saying that if a womens husband dies, she is no longer under the law of marriage and is free to marry. The marriage Law does not apply. Its the same with us, we died with Christ and have risen to a new life FREE FROM THE LAW so we are no longer under its rule. You can get some teaching about marriage from it, but its specifically teaching us that when you died with Christ, you are free from the Law of Moses and are now under Grace. Your dead!

Now like I said, God hates divorce because it creates chaos in the home and hurts the kids, husband and wife. It tears your heart and cause's great strife. Adultery is wrong, if a husband or wife is being abused mentally, physically I have no problem with a divorce, especially in sexual abuse. However, I would counsel a couple to seek the Law of Love first and do their very best to work things out. But we all know that many times a spouse is innocent of wrong doing and is the victim in the divorce. So, we must walk in love toward our mates, and the church must walk in love to the divorcees and stop saying God can not use them or they can not remarry. The stipulation that adultery is the only reason for divorce keeps the line fine so people are not just divorcing for any reason. However, as a pastor, I have advised spouse's to seek a divorce when there is no chance the covenant of marriage can be restored. I know a man who caught his wife cheating on him 16 times in a twenty year period. Her heart was not going to change so they divorced. I also know a woman who was beaten by her husband on a regular basis and I recommend they divorce. The husband was not going to change and there is no reason for the women to endure that kind of life. If the kids are being abused sexually or physically, get the heck out of the home. Try counseling, but if either spouse will not change, move on and allow God to restore them so they can get on with living their lives.

The church is so dogmatic and mean spirited to people it amazes me. Jesus in John chapter eight reveals Gods heart. The women caught in adultery should have been stoned along with the man, but he extended mercy and restoration and he did it under the law. How much more should we do the same now that we are under Grace and Love???

I am totally against sexual sin and a greasy grace, but each divorce case must be examined on an individual basis. If God can restore and forgive, then so must I.

I have a pastor friend who was divorced by his wife because she could not stand ministry. His denomination kicked him out, took his papers and said God would never use him as a pastor due to his divorce. He was innocent. He spent 15 years working in the secular world, trying to over come the stigma the church attached to him. One day, he studied the word and through the help of others he saw that God wanted to still use him even though he was divorce. He is now traveling as an evangelist and has a church of his own and he is blowing and going for God.
   
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02-24-07, 07:31 PM

I am against Divorce because God is against divorce as I am against killing because God is against it. But there are situation that we must analyze case by case.
But Jesus said He was more important than the Law, because He was (is) the Law. And the law of Jesus is Mercy and Love. If you want to divorce your wife because she is older and fat that will be a sin. But if your husband is cruel with you every day or if he rapes your children, then you should get divorced. To God there are no impossible things, so this husband can be restored anytime, but God always respect humans will. If this husband doesn't want to change his behavior then you should move out.

Last edited by ladylovesJesus; 02-25-07 at 03:40 AM.. Reason: corrected typing error for you
   
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02-24-07, 07:56 PM

"So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith." (Gal 3:24)

Jesus is the fulfillment of the law. This does not diminish the law's importance. The law is just as important today as it was 2000 years ago because those who"hunger and thirst for righteousness" (Mt 5:6) must walk the path of keeping the law under their own power to come to understand that they need Jesus.

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adultery - 02-25-07, 02:41 PM

Gal: 3: 19 what purpose then does the law serve? It was added because of transgressions, till the Seed should come to whom the promise was made; and it was appointed through angels by the hand of a mediator. 20 Now a mediator does not mediate for one only, but God is one. 21 Is the law then against the promises of God? Certainly not! For if there had been a law given which could have given life, truly righteousness would have been by the law. 22 But the Scripture has confined all under sin that the promise by faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe. 23 But before faith came, we were kept under guard by the law, kept for the faith which would afterward be revealed. 24 Therefore the law was our tutor to bring us to Christ, that we might be justified by faith. 25 But after faith has come, we are no longer under a tutor. 26 For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus. 27 For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. 28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29 And if you are Christ's, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise.

The Law WAS our tutor until the seed came. The seed was Jesus Christ. If you are in Christ, you have fulfilled all the Law. It is now written in your heart and the Holy Spirit will prompt you when you break it. We are to acknowledge we are now in Christ and not under Mosaic Law. If you try to live under the Law now, you place yourself under the curse of the Law. The only way to receive Gods promises under law was to keep them all. Break one, they all were broken. Our job now is to recognize we can not keep the Law and accept the fact that when you make Jesus your Lord, you’re accepted by FAITH, not the works of the Law. The laws pertaining to divorce are no longer ours to keep. They were never meant for the world or the church age. We are under Grace. Like I said, God does hate divorce. Remember, it’s the act of divorce God hates, not people who get divorced. We are no longer under the condemnation of the Law of Divorce so if you divorce you CAN REMARRY. Now, divorce people have to undergo sufferings a married couple do not. Split families, financial challenges due to alimony and splitting up of all goods. But the key for ALL Christians to realize is that we must reach out to the divorced and get them back on track. They are still accepted by God, can get remarried, can still be a pastor or fill any position in the church. To really put things into perspective, did you know God got a divorce???

Jerm 3:8
Then I saw that for all the causes for which backsliding Israel had committed adultery, I had put her away and given her a certificate of divorce; yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear, but went and played the harlot also.

If God divorced a whole people group, then who are we to put our silly traditions and rules of men on people that God has ALREADY FORGIVEN and accepted?

I will say this though. If you find someone who has been divorced 10 times (exaggeration to get point across.) Then common sense tells you they are not ready for a leadership position until they learn to run their own life. However, they are not disqualified by God and men should not disqualify them either.
   
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04-03-07, 01:44 PM

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Originally Posted by GetSaved!! View Post
This has me worried,I am married to a divorced woman.I was saved before I was married but I dont feel I was really saved since I didnt even attempt to repent of sin afterward.Im just terribly worried Ive been livng in adultery now,without knowing it but that doesnt make it any better.As far as I know she divorced to get away from abuse.I just dont know if Deut24:1-4 applies here since she initiated the divorce.Any of you more knowledged of the Word have an opinion of this?And if this is adultery would the only way to repent be divorce?
There has been other things done that would abolish the marriage from she slept with someone else or he did the covenant between them was broken. There is a sermon I heard that teaches you on the convenant of marriage by Dr. Myles Munroe if I can get the name I will let you know. So many people have thoughts about this topic but there are many ministers who are married with a second wife and the first wife isn't dead. God is no respector of person and He esteem no one higher that the other. You need to repent about everything and be prayerful. The word says "pray without ceasing." I will try find the sermon title but be encourage.
   
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09-14-07, 06:09 PM

I didn't read the whole topic, but to shed some light into the subject of adultery:

Adultery is sin against the marraige vow/ the Covenant of Holy Matrimony.

Commiting adultery is going against the vow to honour the spouse in that there would be no others.

One is not an adulterer/adulteress for having married a divocee, though the second marriage vow is adultery against the first marriage vow.

Since the child of God can get forgiveness and cleansing for sin according to the prescription afforded to all believers in I John 1:9, one must ask God to forgive both instances of adultery against the marraige vow.

Also, since no man can put asunder that which God hath joined together, by the marraige vow, it is best to reverence the institution of Holy Matrimony as something God ordained and is not within the power of man or his court systems to begin with in obtaing a divorce.

Remembering that is was the hardness of a man's heart towards his new spouse that Mose, a man, permitted the divorce.

Also, in the sense of the courtship of the Jewish tradition, the finding some uncleaness in his bride was a wrong against that courtship agreement and was found to have a precedence over the marriage vow, but only according to men and their hard hearts.

I know circumstances have differing effects on the mind of many, but divorce is not an institution of God but of man.

Separating oneself from an abusive spouse is highly recommended and in all situations, until reconciliation is made.

Sorrowfully, that reconciliation is not made until death occurs, and then that isn't always the case that reconciliation was ever made.

Better to forgive and make the best of it.

Better to let God choose the spouse coupling attraction with spiritual harmony between the two, and NOT this "Adam and Steve" mess!!!!

Forgiveness will always have dominion over a hard heart, just ask pharoah if that's not true?
   
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Divorce - 06-14-08, 06:27 PM

This is a hot topic. This topic has been close to my heart for a long time. I was raised as a Baptist. But my first marriage ended in divorce because of adultery on my ex-wife's part. Well because it ended in divorce I am frowned upon in the Baptist faith. Because of the divorce I can not even serve as a deacon in the church, yet alone be a pastor as I am becoming now. I have remarried and my wife and I are both saved. There are two big things I would like to point out. Scripture says when you are saved and washed by the blood of the lamb all your sins are forgiven. Scripture also says that once you are forgiven God can't remember sin. So if God has forgiven me, even though I was not at fault, then why would a particular faith still hold it against me. This is why I have changed religions. I believe the ultimate authority and judge is God, not the church.God knows if your heart is true when you ask for forgiveness, and if it is you are saved and born again. Just my thoughts on a very touchy subject.
God Bless
Robert
   
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06-15-08, 01:15 PM

The fact that the church holds it against you is ridiculous, unscriptural and man-made rules. Don't let it get to you. GOD will judge them accordingly just as He will judge everyone.


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Adultery - 06-15-08, 01:41 PM

This is why I have changed religions. I believe the ultimate authority and judge is God, not the church.God knows if your heart is true when you ask for forgiveness, and if it is you are saved and born again. Just my thoughts on a very touchy subject.

Brother, the statement this is why I changed religions is the key to all this junk on divorce. Serving Christ is not a religion, its a relationship. Religion is killing the church. There is no difference between much of the church today and the religious rulers of Jesus time. We have so many puffed up men who follow the doctrine of men and beat people into a state of hopelessness using vain teachings and are all full of their educated selves.

If a person has been divorced multiple times, they must ask themselves why. There is a problem and they need to discover what it is before they serve as a leader. Reason being, if you are a pastor and especially if you have been with a congregation a long while, it really hurts the church. Make sure your marriage is strong and stable. Leadership takes enough heat without internal strife at home. But even if you have been involved with a divorce, God still loves and accepts you and will work with you to fulfil his will in your life.

Yes the bible says God hates divorce, but there is a reason. Jerm 3: 8 states he divorced Israel. God gave them a writ of divorcement for breaking covenant. If God can divorce, and you can not, then it means he is double minded. Nope, not so!

. If you follow that scripture and its references you will find over and over that God did divorce Israel because they broke the covenant. It’s why he hates divorce, not the divorcee. We all know now that all men can come to God through Christ and that includes the Jews who God divorced. He has now established a new covenant. Read Jer 31: 31.

By all this I mean the following. Yes God hates divorce and his very best is not to have it happen. However, through the death, burial and resurrection of Christ, the sin of divorce was paid for. There are many people who have been divorced and they did not want one. They can still be pastors; they can still serve in the church. The thing that really angers me, these same hypocritical pastors and boards who reject the divorced, will still take there tithe, expect them to work in the church, yet they reject them because of some stupid religious standard men set up! God never said you could not serve in the church. Please do not quote me I or II Tim or Titus. It’s speaking to a society that endorsed multiple wives not divorce. All its saying is you must be married to one wife, nothing to do with divorce.

Sad to say, you can commit murder and the darn church will parade you around and say oh look, he gave his life back to Christ and use you to testify, yet get a divorce and you are treated as a leper.

I am not divorced been married 33 years, but I have a heart for those who have endured the foolishness of men. Go with Gods grace and peace brother and love the people as Christ loved the church.

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06-17-08, 09:17 AM

Quote:
Brother, the statement this is why I changed religions is the key to all this junk on divorce. Serving Christ is not a religion, its a relationship. Religion is killing the church. There is no difference between much of the church today and the religious rulers of Jesus time. We have so many puffed up men who follow the doctrine of men and beat people into a state of hopelessness using vain teachings and are all full of their educated selves.

Again, excellent!

I am not divorced been married 25 years, but I have a heart for those who have endured the foolishness of men. Go with Gods grace and peace brother and love the people as Christ loved the church. Amen


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