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(#1 (permalink))
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Sorry Repentance -
04-16-08, 10:11 AM
Sorry Repentance
NLT Parents devotional Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. James 5:16 Consider for a moment the last time you hurt your mate. An unkind word, impatient gesture, or a harsh tone from you did some damage. Yes, something in the last day or so will do just fine. Now, let’s assume for a moment that you have not resolved that offense. What would be easier to do? 1) Go to your mate and say, “You know when I said or did that thing that hurt you? Well, I’m sorry.” Or 2) go to your mate and say, “You know when I said or did that thing that hurt you? I was wrong, will you forgive me?” Granted, we may have to admit that we would find either statement hard to say. But if we want to promote a healthy relationship, does it make a difference how we “confess our sins to each other”? Most people find it much easier to say, “I’m sorry,” than to say, “I was wrong, will you forgive me?” Why is that the case? Are they interchangeable expressions, or do they approach an offended person with very different messages? Consider for a moment that the first is actually a non-confessional statement quite capable of causing further offense, while the second is an example of genuine confession. “I’m sorry” states a feeling but gives the other person no opportunity to respond. It’s not much more that a vague report of discomfort. It doesn’t really take responsibility or accept the vulnerability of confession. It’s not even clear: Am I sorry you got hurt or sorry that I hurt you? “I’m sorry” doesn’t risk having the other person say, “I don’t forgive you.” That’s why we say, “I’m sorry”—because we’re really not. “I was wrong. Will you forgive me?” is scary, because it lets down our defenses. It gives our mate a clear opportunity to retaliate. It forces us to reverse positions—we might get hurt. It allows the depth of the offense to become clear—perhaps our mate isn’t ready to forgive. “I’m sorry” doesn’t ask for forgiveness. But “Will you forgive me” recognizes that forgiveness isn’t something we can take for granted. 
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(#3 (permalink))
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Moderator
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04-22-08, 02:38 AM
Rizen1,
I like this post. Its true that in order to avoid accountability, we've taken to tossing around vague phrases like "I'm sorry". "I'm sorry" can sound like an apology, especially when its spoken with an artificial pained look painted on one's face. But, in reality, its a shallow, meaningless phrase; and most people see it for what it is when they've heard it over and over from the same person. SLE |
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(#4 (permalink))
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New Member
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04-22-08, 05:24 PM
That's so true.
My husband and I have had an ongoing conversation about the difference between just feeling sorry and actually repenting. Sometimes I feel like it's enough to just feel badly for something I've done, but in Christ, we should truly repent of our sins and turn the opposite direction asking God to help us not to do it anymore. The more we see Christ, the more we won't even want to sin because we will know Him more and be captivated by Him more and more. |
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