1. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."

2. "No God - No Peace? Know God - Know Peace."

3. "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"

4. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."

5. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"

6. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads: "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets."

7. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a sign with big red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."

8. "People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."

9. "Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily."

10. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?"

11. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"

12. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."

13. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."

14. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."

15. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."

16. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."

17. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon."

18. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" (U R)

19. "In the dark? Follow the Son."

20. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."

I love 19

"In the dark? Follow the Son."

"Looking for a sign from God? This is it!"

"Fight truth decay. Study the Bible daily."

"Don't focus on your problem, focus on God's power."

"Give God what's right, not what's left!"

"With God, the tasks ahead of you are never as great as the power behind you"

"Better Savings than Wal-mart!"

"Rapture: Separation of Church and State"

You won't be too busy to die!

"Don't have such an open mind that your brains fall out"

Don't give up, Moses was once a basketcase too!"

Free Trip to Heaven - Details Inside!

Life is short - Pray Hard!

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I can't help but post a few gems that I've seen where someone didn't quite think about how the lecture title would look, or how the top and bottom lines of the sign could come together to make a slightly "different" message, etc.

And so I bring a few unintentionally funny signs that didn't quite send the message the author was aiming for I'm sure:

"Don't let worries kill you,
Let the Church help!"

(Sunday School Sign) The infallible word of God is taught hear. [sic]

Wrestling With God
Sun 10:30am

7:30 and 10:30
Why Bother With Church? (lecture title??)

I feel trapped!
Saturday Worship 6pm (Hoping this was another lecture title)

Sunday Lecture: "I'm Saved, You're Saved...Maybe" by Dr. Harold Guess

Download your worries
Get online with God

Baptism by Fire!
Enroll for Preschool

Everlasting Punishment
All are Welcome

Our God is Awesome
Every Sunday at 10:30am

Great list.

These are my favorites

"Fight truth decay. Study the Bible daily."

"Give God what's right, not what's left!"

"With God, the tasks ahead of you are never as great as the power behind you"

The above (3rd one) is so true and awesome!

...Dont wait on the hearse to take you to church..hummm, something to think about. Also, You're never closer to Jesus, as you are, on your knees.

Originally Posted by EUPHRATES

...Dont wait on the hearse to take you to church..hummm, something to think about. Also, You're never closer to Jesus, as you are, on your knees.

that is I just emailed it to my friends thanks for posting